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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27761956">After the Hospital</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/EverAJoy/pseuds/EverAJoy'>EverAJoy</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>The New Mutants (2020), X-Men (Movieverse), X-Men - All Media Types</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Depression, F/F, F/M, Family, Friendship, Past Abuse, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 22:08:07</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Graphic Depictions Of Violence</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>40,835</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27761956</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/EverAJoy/pseuds/EverAJoy</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>After escaping from the hospital, the New Mutants must figure out what happens next.</p><p>Told mainly from Illyana's pov, this story follows the New Mutants as they escape from Essex Corp, learn to control their powers, and meet the X-Men.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Danielle Moonstar/Rahne Sinclair, Roberto da Costa &amp; Illyana Rasputin, Roberto da Costa/Illyana Rasputin, Sam Guthrie &amp; Danielle Moonstar &amp; Illyana Rasputin &amp; Roberto da Costa &amp; Rahne Sinclair</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>96</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>173</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>CHAPTER I: Plans for the Future</p><p>Unsurprisingly, Dr. Reyes had lied about how far the closest town was. Illyana estimated that they had only walked sixteen miles instead of the supposed twenty. Still the walk was long and exhausting.<br/>
Rahne and Dani walked in front of the rest of the group, holding hands and talking about what was next. Roberto and Sam mainly walked in silence, but occasionally they would talk about what they were going to do when they reached town. And Illyana walked next to them. Not with them; next to them.<br/>
She had no idea why she chose to continue walking with them. With Reyes gone, her teleportation was once again unlimited. She could simply make a portal to Limbo, and from Limbo go anywhere in the world she wanted. Maybe she’d go to Bermuda and take a vacation, or head back to Russia and live her life away from Essex Corp. But the idea of leaving the other four mutants seemed unpleasant, so she found herself walking for several hours instead of teleporting to safety.<br/>
‘Like they would ever survive without me,’ Illyana thought. ‘Yes, that’s why I’m staying. Not because it would help me, but because they would be dead in less than a day.’<br/>
Although Illyana knew she was lying to herself, she was not ready to admit that she was staying because she felt safe with them.</p><p>**************************************</p><p>When they finally reached the town, the sun had long since gone down, and all five mutants were exhausted and hungry. In the distance, Illyana saw a convenience store across from a rundown motel. It was not much, but it was better than a cage.<br/>
“I’ll be right back,” Illyana told the others. She vanished in a flash of blue light before any of them could protest.<br/>
Illyana teleported into the store. She quickly grabbed some protein bars, chips, and bottles of water. Stuffing the stolen goods into her pillow case, the blonde peeked over the aisle and saw that the worker was restocking the shelves. ‘Perfect.’ She quickly teleported to the register and grabbed all of the cash. She teleported out of the store and to her friends--wait not her friends--before the poor man even knew she was there.<br/>
“Did you just rob a convenience store?” Sam questioned in his thick southern accent when the blonde reappeared with the supplies. Sam, Rahne, and Dani looked shocked while Roberto did not even seem phased by her behavior.<br/>
Illyana raised her eyebrows at the accusing mutants. “All five of us have killed people and are wanted by some shady organization and probably the government, but you draw the line at stealing?” Illyana asked him in her normal condescending tone. Before Sam could respond, the Russian girl spoke again. “Listen. We have no money and no supplies, and we’re likely being hunted by those creeps in Essex Corp. We do not have time to take the high road.”<br/>
While she could tell they weren’t happy about her words, the others knew she was right. They would never escape Essex Corp if they did everything the legal way. They would have to break some laws in order to survive. Shouldn’t be too hard, right?</p><p>**************************************</p><p>They had only asked for one motel room. Outwardly, they said it was because they didn’t want to waste money on multiple rooms. But the five mutants truly just did not want to sleep alone.<br/>
The walls were brown with peeling paint. The carpet floor was dirty and had some disturbing stains. And Illyana was quite positive that the bedding had not been changed in weeks. Yet, the blonde had never felt so relaxed as she did sitting in between Roberto and Sam on the edge of one of the beds. Dani and Rahne sat across from them, and Dani kept her hand firmly in Rahne’s as if she were scared to let go.<br/>
“So where do we go from here?” Dani finally asked after over ten minutes of sitting in silence.<br/>
Roberto sighed and put his head in his hands. “Well we know we can’t stay here,” the Brazillian boy replied. “Essex may already be looking for us, and this will be the first place they look."<br/>
Dani nodded. “We will have to leave in the morning and continue traveling until we get somewhere safe.”<br/>
“But where?” Illyana snapped. “Do you know anyone looking to take care of a bunch of teenage mutants with little control over their abilities?”<br/>
It was silent for a moment. “What about the X-Men?” Sam asked quietly, as if he were afraid that his idea was stupid.<br/>
“What about them?” The blonde asked coldly.<br/>
“They help people like us. They could keep us safe from Essex.” Sam looked like he wanted to say more, but kept his mouth shut upon seeing the cold look on Illyana’s face.<br/>
“He’s right,” Rahne said. “They may be our only hope.”<br/>
Illyana did not like the idea. She did not want to be around any more people, let alone superhero mutants that always made the right decisions. She had not made the right decision in years; she acted out of fear and a need for survival. She knew that none of them would ever understand why she had to kill all of those people. Unlike Dani, Sam, and Roberto, she had not killed them on accident. It wasn’t even truly self-defense like it was in Rahne’s case. No, Illyana had acted out of a desire for revenge and a desire to be free. None of them would ever understand that.<br/>
Yet she knew they were right. They were just kids. They couldn’t take down an organization like Essex Corp alone. If they were going to survive, they would need help. And there was no help quite as powerful as the X-Men. The blonde realized that her friends were staring at her, waiting for her reaction. She simply nodded at them, letting them know that she was not opposed.<br/>
“So, now that that’s settled,” Roberto began, “does anyone actually know how to contact the X-Men?”<br/>
They once again fell into silence. None of them had any idea, but it was late and they were exhausted from fighting a demon bear and walking sixteen miles. They agreed that they would leave in the morning and figure out the details of their plan once they slept. With that in mind, the five mutants turned out the lights and went to their assigned beds.<br/>
Surprisingly, Illyana had offered to take the small couch in the motel room. She wanted to have some space when she slept. She didn’t want to alarm them when she had her nightmares. Not that they cared about her well-being, but she did not want them to feel like she couldn’t handle herself. She cuddled with Lockheed, and her dragon told her good night before they both fell asleep.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter II: Inner Demons</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Illyana dwells on her personal demons, and Essex Corp strikes against the New Mutants.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>CHAPTER II: Inner Demons</p>
<p>Illyana woke long before the others did. This came as no surprise to the blonde as she had never been able to sleep for long. Too many things were looking to hurt her when her guard was down. She refused to be hurt ever again.<br/>She decided that she would take advantage of her early start and hopped in the shower. She scrubbed herself clean of all the dirt, dust, and blood that covered her body. She scrubbed so hard hoping to clean herself of all of the blood that stained her hands, but some people were just too far gone for forgiveness. Illyana was one of those people. She didn’t deserve anything but pain and misery.<br/>It took her a long time to accept that. When she was a child living with the smiley men, she used to dream that someone would come save her and she would live happily ever after. She soon found that her dreams were a lie concealing her from the truth: she was wicked. She was a monster hiding under pretty blonde hair and a beautiful body. That’s why she wasn’t afraid to kill or steal to get her way. That’s why even after all of that therapy, she couldn’t bring herself to regret killing those men. She deserved all of the suffering that she had gone through.<br/>By the time the others had gotten up, Illyana was dressed and in a deep conversation with Lockheed. They were discussing how powerful she would be now. Without Reyes’s shields blocking her powers, she had full connection to the dimensions again. She could already feel all of her sorcery returning to her. In the hospital, her sorcery was limited to small things like summoning her sword or making crayons move, but now she could do so much more. At least she thought she could. It had been a long time since she was free to practice her magic.<br/>By the time all of the mutants had finished showering, Illyana’s hair was completely dry and she was hungry. When she voiced this complaint, the others agreed with her, and they walked to a nearby diner. After ordering their food, the group ate in silence wanting to focus on their first restaurant meal in a long time. Illyana was so focused on her pancakes, that she did not notice that something was wrong until Roberto nudged her.<br/>The sight on the TV made her blood run cold. Apparently, a giant demon bear destroying a building did not go unnoticed by the government. The news reporter said that mutant activity was the suspected cause, and that government officials and the X-Men were currently looking for said mutants.<br/>“Great,” Sam muttered sarcastically. “How much do you want to bet that those government agents will hand us back over to Essex the moment they find us.”<br/>“We don’t know that for sure Sam,” Rahne reassured him. But it fell on deaf ears. Even Rahne knew that they could not take the risk that the government would help them. They had to leave. Immediately.<br/>Sam threw down some of the cash to pay for the food, and all five of the mutants rushed out the door.<br/>“So what do we do?” Dani asked.<br/>“I honestly have no idea,” the southern boy said. “We should hotwire a car and try to make it to the next town. We won’t make it far enough on foot.”<br/>“You think we should steal a car?” Rahne asked appalled. Her poor Catholic heart could not handle the idea of being involved in so much theft.<br/>“We don’t really have any other option.”<br/>It was settled. There were no more arguments to be had on the subject. They needed to go, and they needed to go quickly. Fortunately, Roberto was very skilled at hotwiring cars, and within minutes they were driving out of town in the opposite direction from the hospital.<br/>“Are you sure we should be driving away?” Rahne asked nervously. “The X-Men are looking into this case too. We agreed that they could help us.”<br/>“Yes, but I would rather not take the chance that Essex finds us instead,” Sam said as he turned onto an empty street.<br/>Illyana stopped listening to the conversation. She knew why Rahne was worried. The X-Men really were the best option at the moment, but Sam was right. It was too big of a risk. Instead of adding to the conversation, Illyana began to talk to Lockheed about how the woman on the news was wearing the ugliest bright red lipstick she had ever seen.<br/>“Yes Lockheed,” Illyana agreed, “she did look like a clown.”<br/>Illyana’s conversation was interrupted when Sam abruptly stomped on the breaks. Everyone screamed as they flew forward at the sudden stop.<br/>“Sam, why the hell did you do that?” Illyana snarled angrily as she cradled Lockheed. The abrupt stop hadn’t hurt her dragon, but it could have. Sam did not answer. Illyana was about to rudely ask again when she saw the man standing in the middle of the road.<br/>Man was the wrong word for what the man was, he looked like a demon. He had red scaly skin and large spikes on his face. Illyana squeezed Lockheed closer to her; she was not ready to face more demons. She had hoped she would never see one again.<br/>The five teens rushed out of the car to face the demon-like mutant. Illyana was on edge, she didn’t like how quiet it was. As if this whole situation were perfectly set up. The demon man had a diamond shape pendant on his jacket, and it took Illyana a moment to realize where she had seen it before.<br/>Reyes.<br/>“We need to go now!” The blonde shouted at her friends. Before her friends could react, the ground beneath them began to shake. Illyana turned her head and saw another mutant on the other side of the road wearing one of the stupidest uniforms she had ever seen. He had a helmet with a glass shield to protect his face. Despite his stupid outfit, he was powerful. With a movement of his hands, the ground began to split.<br/>'Okay, this is not too much to handle.' Illyana thought to herself. 'I can just teleport behind him and stab him. Easy.'<br/>And then the gunshots started.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter III: No Holding Back</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>The New Mutants have their first fight against Essex Corp. It goes very well until it doesn't.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>CHAPTER III: No Holding Back</p>
<p>Rahne screamed as the bullets raced past the young mutants. She seemed to be frozen in fear, and Sam had to grab her arm and drag her behind the car to safety.<br/>“They’re going to kill us,” Dani muttered fearfully.<br/>“No, they’re not,” Illyana said. She examined the ‘bullets’ and found that they weren’t bullets at all; they were tranquilizer darts. “They’re going to try to take us again.”<br/>“Well we can’t let them,” Sam said as his arms began to glow purple. “I’m not going to let them turn me into a killer.”<br/>Rahne looked around to see that all the other mutants looked ready to fight. ‘This is such a bad idea,’ she thought before she changed into wolf form. If they were going down, they were going down fighting.</p>
<p>**************************************</p>
<p>Fortunately for Illyana, she had no moral problem with killing or, at the very least, severely harming the Essex Corp agents standing in front of her. Fighting came naturally to her; she was meant to kill. She wouldn’t stop until none of them were breathing.<br/>First things first, take out the man who was causing the avalanche. Simple enough. She appeared behind the mutant and ran her sword through his back--straight through the heart. One down, about thirty to go.<br/>She continued on like this: flashing next to the opposing mutants and taking them down quickly. Her kill count was now twenty-five; seven more than the day prior. Illyana knew that the self-loathing would take over later, but, for now, she would rather kill a hundred more people than be dragged back to another cage. Her whole life had been cages. She had just gotten her first taste of freedom and she wasn’t ready to let it go.<br/>She vaguely noticed that her friends were fighting alongside her. Sam kept flying through and knocking people down; Roberto was in full solar form and was using his strength and heat to his full advantage; Rahne was tearing into people, and Dani was standing next to her with a gun that she had stolen from one of the people that Illy killed. All of her friends were okay... she was okay... until she wasn't.<br/>It happened so suddenly that even Illyana’s killer instincts were thrown off. One moment Illyana was preparing to cut through a man with her sword, the next she couldn’t move. She was frozen; every movement was met with an invisible force. ‘Telekinesis,’ the blonde thought. This wasn’t a good sign.<br/>Illyana sensed her before she saw her. A dark haired woman with a glowing pink sword walked towards her. In her right hand was a syringe, probably filled with a sedative. Unfortunately for the telekinetic bitch, Illyana wasn’t just a regular mutant.<br/>“Ignis inferni,” Illyana hissed while making eye contact with the bitch. Around her, blue fire erupted from the ground; the flames grew with Illyana’s anger… and Illyana had a lot of anger. In the background, she heard the screams of the Essex Corp agents as they were engulfed in the fire, but Illyana’s focus was on the dark haired woman. “Non amplius imperium.”<br/>The woman looked shocked as her hold over Illyana broke. Illyana slowly rose to her feet, sword in hand and eyes glowing blue. If they were going to have a sword fight, it would be without any telekinetic help. Illyana swung first, and the two were locked in battle. Illyana put her full focus on the battle; the sounds of the fight around her faded away as she fought to kill.<br/>The woman was obviously a skilled fighter, but Illyana was meaner. She fought dirty. If the woman was close to striking her, Illyana teleported behind her. At one point, the woman managed to cut her arm, but Illyana didn’t feel it. She was numb to everything but the current battle. Numb to everything but the rage within.<br/>Illyana wasn’t blind to the sudden look of concentration that passed over the woman’s face. She just didn’t think anything of it until she felt a prodding in her mind. The blonde’s rage was reignited in full. How dare the bitch try to get in her head.<br/>“You think you can control me?” Illyana bellowed. Her voice startled even her. It didn’t sound like her, didn’t sound human. It was pure demonic. The woman looked startled as Illyana swung her sword and cut through the pink sword. The woman tried to back up, but she should have known that you can’t run away from a teleporter.<br/>Illyana swiped her sword and slashed her across the stomach. The woman fell to her knees in agony. The look in her eyes was pure fear; she knew she had lost. She knew that the girl in front of her was a demon with no reservations about killing her. She closed her eyes as Illyana raised her sword, ready for the final strike. Before Illy could kill the woman, she heard a sound. The only sound that could break her out of her focus. One of her friends screamed in pain.<br/>Illyana turned her head and saw Dani on the ground bleeding. Rahne stood over her protectively, but they were surrounded on all sides. Without thinking twice, Illyana abandoned her fight and teleported next to Rahne. She knew that putting herself in a situation where she was surrounded was not the smart move, but her primary concern was for the girl laying on the ground. Sam and Roberto joined the girls in their fight against the men, but it was no use. Their focus was broken.<br/>More cars pulled up bringing more agents from Essex Corp. The New Mutants were totally outnumbered and down a member. They couldn’t win this one.<br/>Slowly, one by one, Illyana saw all of her friends get knocked down. Rahne was more concerned with protecting Dani than she was with protecting herself, so she didn’t see the tranq dart until it was too late. Sam got hit over the head by a mutant with six arms, and he was out cold before he hit the ground. Soon, it was only her and Roberto still fighting.<br/>None of the agents could get too close to Roberto without burning up, so it was the perfect defense. If too many people got in his way, he simply burned hotter and they had to back off. It was the perfect plan, until it wasn’t. A mutant walked towards him and before their eyes turned his body into water.<br/>“Berto!” Illyana screamed. But her screams were in vain. The water put out his fire, and Roberto was forced back into his regular human form. The water man held up a syringe and Roberto watched fearfully as the man began to bring it closer to his neck. Illyana couldn’t take it. She felt a sudden burst of anxiety and anger, and she let it flow through her like a tidal wave.<br/>She screamed.<br/>Louder than she ever had before. She felt her power escaping her; surrounding her and her friends in a circle of blue light. And in a flash they were gone.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Notes:<br/>So I brought in some popular X-Men villains, even though they're only there for a short time.<br/>Avalanche is one of them, but Illyana kills him rather quickly.<br/>I saw someone bring Psylocke into another story to have her fight Illyana, and I liked the pairing, so I added her too.</p>
<p>Also, Illyana is beginning to discover how powerful she is. She used her magic to summon fire and break Psylocke's telekinesis, but she also used her teleportation abilities in a way she never has before. Magik has now discovered that she can teleport all of her friends with her across the dimensions...I'm excited for all the doors this opens up for this story.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter IV: Limbo</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Illyana wakes up in Limbo with her friends and has a heart to heart with Roberto.</p>
<p>A bit of a filler chapter, but there is some serious character development here.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>CHAPTER IV: Limbo</p>
<p>When Illyana came to, she was shocked to find herself in Limbo instead of in a cage. Lockheed, in his physical dragon form, laid curled up on her chest. He blew warm air through his nose as he slept soundly. ‘Some guard dragon you are,’ Illyana thought. ‘Sleeping while I’m knocked out. I could have died.’ But she stroked her beautiful dragon anyways. Lockheed was the only constant in her life. The only thing that she knew would always be there for her. Everyone and everything else was just temporary. People tended to leave her once they realized how much baggage she had. It was just a matter of time before her friends left too.<br/>She didn’t want to admit it to herself, but she had to. She loved Berto, Sam, Rahne, and even Dani. She felt safer with them than she had felt in years. In fact, she hadn’t felt safe since she was a toddler, wrapped in her mother’s arms. Somehow, even with all the craziness and an evil organization chasing them, Illyana had never felt more safe. More free. More happy.<br/>Happy was an odd word for her. She wasn’t truly sure if she knew what happiness was. She could not remember a time she had felt it. Such an emotion was lost on her in her dark childhood. She got joy from little things: pulling pranks, rebelling, and seeing the anger on people’s faces when she inevitably found the right buttons to push. She got excitement from teleporting for the first time, playing with Lockheed, and drugging Dr. Reyes’ tea. But if she were ever meant to be happy in her life, she couldn’t picture a happier time than escaping with her friends. Hearing them talk and laugh and just being genuinely excited to rediscover the world made her want to rediscover the world too.<br/>She wanted to discover new things with them. There was so much she had never done. She’d been locked in cage after cage since she was four years old. She’d never had cookies or brownies, never drank soda, never ice skated, never did anything that kids were supposed to do. As a child, she learned it was best to never look forward to the future. Thoughts of learning, of experiencing, of having friends and a family were banned for her mind. She knew that the chance of anything good happening to her was slim to none. But now she had a chance. A chance to be happy and discover who she was outside of cages.<br/>But it couldn’t last. Sooner or later, her friends would come to realize that her personality wasn’t just an act. She was simply wicked through and through. She did not have enough good in her to behave how normal teenage girls should act. She had been spiraling for thirteen years, and now she was stuck in her own pit of evil. They would see that. They would leave. Just like her family, just like everyone.<br/>Illyana was so wrapped up in her thoughts that it took the sudden movement of her head to get her out of them. ‘Wait,’ she thought, ‘why is my head moving?’<br/>She looked up and saw that she hadn’t been laying down on the ground in Limbo. Well, she had, but she hadn’t. Her body was on the ground, but her head was in Roberto’s lap. Strangely enough, Illyana wasn’t mad that he put her head in his lap. She was actually sort of thankful because laying on the ground would have hurt her neck. He was staring off at the sky, soaking up Limbo’s weird red sun. He didn’t realize that she was awake until she moved to sit up.<br/>“Hey,” Illyana greeted him. “How long was I out for?” She looked around her to see that all of her friends were still passed out on the ground. They had not recovered from the battle with Essex yet.<br/>“A little under an hour,” Roberto replied. “I’m relieved you woke up. I have absolutely no idea where the hell you took us to.” He paused for a moment before continuing. “Wait! This isn’t Hell right?! I mean the ground and sky are red, and you do talk a lot about demons, and-”<br/>Illyana put her hand over his mouth to shut him up. “No,” she stated firmly. “This isn’t Hell, this is Limbo. My special place. My own dimension. I created it when I was six by sheer force of will. Do not ask how because I have no idea.” At this point, Lockheed woke up and crawled off of Illyana. The dragon walked towards Dani who thankfully was no longer bleeding, and curled up next to her.<br/>Roberto was silent for a moment. “If you could teleport all of us this whole time, why did you make us walk sixteen miles and steal a car.”<br/>Illyana rolled her eyes. “I had no idea I could teleport the rest of you with me to Limbo. I guess there is a first time for everything,” the blonde huffed. “I mean, I brought Dani here once, but that was through a weak portal and was more meant to startle her than transport her. The portal really would not have done much.” Illy stood up and dusted the red dirt off of her clothes. “It’s a good thing I woke up before them. It will give me time to figure out how to get us all back to Earth.”<br/>“Wait, you don’t know how to get us back?” Roberto asked incredulously.<br/>“I don’t even know how I got us here,” the blonde deadpanned. She closed her eyes and tried to concentrate on the dimensional energy around. She was feeling for the right energy to take her where she wanted. She figured she could drop them a state or two from where they were. That way, they would have a head start on Essex Corp. She didn’t trust herself to take them farther than a few hours away though. She had never teleported more than herself, and she decided that she did not want to start out with a difficult journey. She had just found the perfect wavelength when Roberto placed his hand on her arm.<br/>“Have you figured it out yet?” He asked. His question was not rushing her, it was calm and soothing.<br/>Illyana nodded at the Brazilian boy. “I can get us as far as Pennsylvania,” she said. “We were in Virginia before, so that gives us plenty of space to further escape from Essex.” She sighed. “I’m sorry, I wish I could take us further. It’s just that I have never teleported with this many people.”<br/>Roberto squeezed her arm that he was still holding. “It’s okay I understand. Don’t you dare feel bad. You saved us.”<br/>Illyana simply shrugged at him, but Berto wasn’t having it.<br/>“No seriously,” he exclaimed. “We all would have died without you teleporting us to Limbo. Even before that, you were amazing out there. You cut through those soldiers like they were clay. You are the strongest person I have ever met. Thank you.”<br/>They stared into each other’s eyes for a few minutes. Roberto’s hand was still on Illyana’s arm, and Illyana had no intention of moving it. It was strange; she had always hated other people’s touch. It reminded her too much of the way the Smiley Men used to caress her, or the way all the people who had her before Essex had touched her because she was “pretty as can be.” But Roberto’s touch comforted her, warmed a part of her that had long been frozen.<br/>“I know your secret by the way,” Roberto broke the silence with a smile. “Don’t worry, I won’t tell on you?”<br/>Illyana raised her eyebrows in annoyance and confusion. “What do you mean secret?”<br/>“I saw you out there,” Roberto said as he stepped closer to her. “You were close to killing that dark haired woman that you were fighting, but you stopped when you heard Dani scream. You dropped everything to go help her. You gave up your own personal vendetta to make sure that we were okay.”<br/>Roberto took another big step towards her. They were practically face to face, but Illyana did not move back.<br/>“I know your secret,” he continued. “You care. You care more than you will ever let on. You hide it behind mean comments and deadly glares, but you have a soul somewhere deep inside you. I hate to break it to you, Illy, but you’re human. Just like the rest of us.”<br/>And in that moment, for the first time in years, Illyana did feel human. Just a little bit.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Yay!!! Illy is starting to recover from years of trauma and abuse. Also I'm slipping Roberto and Illyana in as a ship in this story.<br/>I know that they're not a thing in the comics, but I feel like in the movie, their characters are kind of meant to be.<br/>Roberto is traumatized after having killed his girlfriend with his powers, and Illyana is very hard to kill. She is the exact thing he needs at the moment: she is strong, tough, and seemingly unbreakable.<br/>And Berto is warm and ridiculous. He is so human. And Illyana needs to get in touch with humanity.<br/>I'm excited to further develop them in this story; I think they will make each other stronger.</p>
<p>Also, for those of you wondering, the X-Men will be joining the story in the next chapter or two. Don't worry I got plans for Illyana and Colossus.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Chapter V: Searching</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Colossus and the X-Men search for the New Mutants, and Colossus looks back at the day his sister disappeared.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Note: This chapter is going to be from Piotr AKA Colossus's point of view.<br/>Also, I know my file description sucks. It was not supposed to be great, it was just supposed to provide general information to the X-Men about the New Mutants. Please keep that in mind, and enjoy the chapter!!!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>CHAPTER V: Searching</p>
<p>Piotr paced back and forth in Professor X’s office. He could tell that his fellow X-Men were getting annoyed with his restlessness, but, for once, his friends’ feelings were not his priority: his sister was.</p>
<p>**************************************</p>
<p>He had been digging through the ruins of the creepy hospital; he was in charge of lifting the heavy objects because he was so strong. Next to him, his girlfriend Kitty had been simply phasing through the ruins as they and the other X-Men searched for clues to what had happened there. So far, there had been no clues except for the video footage. But the video footage was spotty at best. It clearly showed a giant bear destroying the facility, but everything else was confusing. There were flashes of blue seemingly fending the monster off, then there was something that resembled a purple comet joining the blue light. Then the bear disappeared. It made absolutely no sense.<br/>
He had been near ready to quit his search when Kitty shouted that she found something. All of the X-Men rushed over to the brunette to see what she had found: files. Five files with a diamond emblem on the cover. An emblem they knew all too well.<br/>
“Of course Essex Corp. would be behind this,” Wolverine snarled. “What is it this time? More cloning experiments? A failed experiment at building a robot army to take over the world?”<br/>
“Kids,” Kitty answered simply. “Mutant kids.”<br/>
Dread passed over every one of their faces. Mutant children were being experimented on and they had no idea. It was their job to protect mutant kind, but these mutants, not just mutants but kids, were treated like lab rats for some sick organization. Piotr felt sick just thinking about it.<br/>
They looked at each of their files.</p>
<p>Danielle Moonstar:<br/>
Age: 16<br/>
Power: Unknown, psionic energy detected</p>
<p>Rahne Sinclair:<br/>
Age: 15<br/>
Power: Transformation into a wolf and were-wolf like abilities</p>
<p>Roberto da Costa:<br/>
Age: 17<br/>
Power: Sunlight absorption allowing subject to reach extreme temperatures and have increased strength</p>
<p>Sam Guthrie:<br/>
Age: 16<br/>
Power: Energy blasts from hands allowing subject to propel himself in the air</p>
<p>But it was the last file that they saw that made Piotr sick to his stomach.</p>
<p>Illyana Rasputin<br/>
Age: 17<br/>
Power: Teleportation across space and dimensions; ability to summon a magical sword at will; armor that covers part of her body that appears at will; subject appears to also have abilities not from her mutant gene. More tests needed.</p>
<p>Piotr could not move. He was stuck staring at the file; more specifically the picture on the file. A teenage girl with yellow-blonde hair and cold brown eyes.<br/>
It had been thirteen years since the metal X-Man had seen his sister, but he definitely recognized her. Same beautiful blonde hair; same thin nose; same everything. The only thing that was different was her eyes. His snowflake had such warm and lively eyes as a child, but now her eyes were cold and void of emotion. But the difference did not matter to him. After all of these years, he had found proof that his baby sister was alive.</p>
<p>**************************************</p>
<p>That was why Piotr would not stop pacing. His sister was out there somewhere, possibly injured and being hunted by Essex Corp. He simply could not stop himself from pacing until Professor X found Illyana and the other mutants. He tried to stand still for a moment, but he felt like he was gonna explode with restless energy. He just kept repeating the same phrase over and over again in his head. ‘She’s alive. She’s alive. She’s alive.’<br/>
He remembered when he found out that she was taken. No, taken was the wrong word. His sister had been sent away. His parents had always hated mutants. They thought that all mutants were a plague sent to wipe out human-kind. Unfortunately, having three mutant children did not help to lighten their opinion on the situation.<br/>
When his brother Mikhail’s powers had surfaced. His parents shunned him. They forced him to enlist in the Russian military because they hoped that war would scare the mutation out of him. Instead, Mikhail ended up dying in battle. His parents did not mourn their oldest son. They moved on, raising their other son Piotr and even having a daughter. Piotr had loved his sister; he read her bedtime stories, played with her on the farm, and helped to make sure that she was always safe and happy. His parents loved both of them, or so he thought, until his mutant powers had manifested.<br/>
It was so sudden, one moment he saw a tractor heading towards his baby sister, and the next he was in front of the tractor. His body turned to steel and with his strength, he stopped the tractor from running over the young Illyana. His baby sister was delighted. She giggled and jumped on top of him; his mutation was fascinating to her. Unfortunately, his parents did not see it the same way. They screamed at him, called him a disgrace and a mistake. They demanded that they leave their home immediately. Had it not been for Professor Xavier coming to Russia to recruit him to the X-Men, he would have been homeless. So he left for America with the professor and left his sister with her parents.<br/>
What a mistake that had been. Piotr assumed that she would be fine at that home; she was a little girl, she did not have any mutant powers, and his parents adored their daughter. Illyana was a bright light to the entire family, and he was so sure that his parents would hold onto that light. He planned to visit as often as he could, making sure to monitor his sister in case she mutated like he and their brother had. But he had left her alone with monsters.<br/>
He remembered that horrible day. Thirteen years ago Professor X flew him home so he could see his family. He was of course greeted with cold glares and harsh words from his parents, but they did not matter to him. He asked where his sister was, and their response shocked him to his core. They said they had not seen her for weeks.<br/>
Piotr of course did not trust a word that came out of his parents mouth, and Professor X seemed to have the same thought. Xavier read Mr. and Mrs. Rasputin’s minds and found the truth. They had determined that since two of their children were mutants, that the third one would be as well. They did not want another mutant child in their life. So when men in black clothing came and offered to take Illyana off of their hands, they had happily obliged. When Piotr found out, he was so enraged that he almost killed them. The only reason he didn’t was because the professor stopped him.<br/>
Piotr and the other X-Men had looked everywhere. They tracked down the men that took her, but they were already dead by the time they got there. Wolverine theorized that they were just the delivery men, and that the men in charge killed them off when they were no longer useful. They followed every loose end they could, but they all led nowhere. Professor X even tried to find her on Cerebro, but the signal ran cold. It was as if she did not exist, and if someone did not exist on Cerebro, they either blocked their minds or they were dead.<br/>
And Illyana was not old enough to block her mind.<br/>
He mourned his baby sister, knowing that more likely than not she was dead. It took years for him to be able to look in the mirror and not feel guilty for leaving her. Kitty was a big help in that. She spent a long time convincing him that he was a good man and was still worthy of love. And he fell in love with her too. Still, Illyana’s death haunted him as his worst mistake. But now, after all of these years, he found out that his sister was alive. She was really alive.<br/>
But according to Cerebro, she was still nowhere to be found. It was driving him crazy. None of the five mutants were showing up. It was like they completely vanished. They had shown up for a few minutes at the beginning of the search, but then they vanished. However, they traced the signal and found a site of a fight.<br/>
About fifty Essex Corp soldiers laid dead on the ground. This shocked all of the X-Men. Five teenage mutants did all of that? The ways that some of them had died were clear; a lot of them were cut and dismembered with some sort of weapon; some were mauled; some seemed to have been burned alive. What was most confusing was how the majority of them died. About thirty of the men seemed to have died from being thrown back by a powerful force. Their bodies laid spread out in a circular formation, surrounding a large circle that was burnt into the dirt on the ground. Whoever had done that had been extremely powerful.<br/>
But, like with all the trails that Piotr had followed in his quest to find his sister, the trail ran cold at the site of the battle. There was no trace of any of the kids, no proof that they were even there--besides the fifty dead bodies, of course. So, the X-Men went back to trying to track them using Cerebro.<br/>
This went on for hours. More waiting. More pacing. More waiting. More pacing. More waiting. More pacing.<br/>
Finally, just as Piotr felt like he was going to go insane, Professor X entered the office with good news. “Cerebro has just detected a shift in dimensional energy in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania,” he said. “It also detected new mutant signatures in the city.”<br/>
Piotr felt his spirits rise. He knew it was them; it had to be them.<br/>
Cyclops nodded at the professor's news. “That makes sense. Colossus’s sister is a teleporter. That’s why we could not find them; they literally were not in this world.”<br/>
With that, the X-Men went to prepare the jet to take them to Philadelphia. Colossus sat in the X-jet feeling a hope that he had not felt in years. He was going to bring his sister home.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>And the X-Men have officially entered the story!<br/>As you can probably tell, I kept some things the same as the comic books, but I also drastically changed some things.<br/>I kept that Illyana and Piotr had an older brother named Mikhail that had died (in the comics they thought he died, but he was really in a pocket dimension I think). I also kept the origin story of Piotr's powers because I feel like it is a cute story that paints him out to be a good brother.<br/>I did change their parents however; I felt that having their parents hate mutants and them being the reason why Illyana was taken is a good backstory for a character. It would explain a lot of her abandonment issues and a lot of her self loathing.</p>
<p>The story will be back in Illyana's POV next chapter.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Chapter VI: Milkshakes</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>The New Mutants leave limbo and find a place to get food. They are interrupted by surprising guests.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Illyana is going to be a lot more civil with her friends in this chapter, as she is beginning to open up to them.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>CHAPTER VI: Milkshakes</p><p>As they waited for their friends to wake up, Illyana and Roberto passed the time by telling jokes and playing with Lockheed. Illyana had used her magic to make a small glowing blue ball that the two mutants used to play fetch with the dragon. Lockheed was loving the attention. No matter how far Roberto threw the ball, the dragon would come right back wagging his tail like a golden retriever. Illyana was glad to see Lockheed this excited; there was hardly ever time for play in their lives. But she was sad that as soon as they got back to Earth, she would have to turn him back into a puppet.<br/>
"It's just temporary," Illyana promised him. "As soon as we get somewhere safe, I'll allow you to have physical form again."<br/>
It took two hours for everyone to finally wake up. Sam woke first, clutching his head and saying how he definitely had a concussion. Then Dani woke; the cut on her head had stopped bleeding, but it would leave a nasty scar if she did not get stitches soon. Rahne woke last, but the tranq darts left her feeling weak and tired. It would be a while before she regained her strength.<br/>
When everyone was finally awake, the five mutants gathered around to come up with a plan.<br/>
“I’m going to drop all of us in Philadelphia,” Illyana explained. “From there, we need to get food and money and find a way to get further away from Virginia.”<br/>
“How are we supposed to get money?” Rahne asked. “You’re not planning to rob another convenience store are you?”<br/>
“Not if you have any better ideas,” Illyana said challengingly, raising a blonde eyebrow at the wolf. Rahne stayed silent; at the moment, stealing was the only way to survive.<br/>
“We’re going to need to get some medical attention also,” Roberto added glancing worriedly at Dani and Sam. “They’re not in any shape to travel, and I don’t want to ignore their injuries just for them to get worse.”<br/>
“We’re going to be fine,” Sam protested. “We don’t need to be worrying about this right now. We have bigger problems. Besides, it’s not like five young mutants can walk into a hospital. Especially if they’re being hunted by the government.”<br/>
“We do need to be worrying about this right now,” Roberto argued. “And who said anything about a hospital? We’re going to a big city, there are bound to be plenty of mutants there. We just need to find some willing to help us. For the most part, mutants help mutants. We just need to find the right ones.”<br/>
“And what if we run into the wrong mutants, Roberto?” Dani asked. “We can’t take the risk of being turned back in to Essex Corp."<br/>
"Or worse,” Sam added.<br/>
“They’re right, Berto,” Rahne said. “As much as I hate it, we can’t afford to be worrying about nonfatal injuries at the moment. We need to focus on getting food and getting out of Philadelphia as our first priorities.”<br/>
Illyana could tell that Roberto hated the idea--no he despised it--but he was outnumbered.</p><p>**************************************</p><p>The five mutants sighed in relief when they walked into a popular burger joint; they decided food was a necessity and that people would be less likely to notice them in a crowded place. They had washed all of the blood and dirt off of their skin, so they looked like regular teenagers eating dinner. Illyana for once was glad that they would not stand out in the crowd.<br/>
Her hand grazed over her pocket full of freshly stolen money as she sat down at a table with her friends. She was starving and kind of excited. She had never eaten at a restaurant before, and there was so much to try. The menu was a struggle though; there were so many words that she was not familiar with, so the blonde leaned over to ask Dani what she should get.<br/>
Fortunately, Dani did not make a big deal over Illyana not understanding what to do. “I would go with the number four special and a milkshake.”<br/>
Illyana nodded at this. “What type of milkshake would be good? I’ve never had one before.”<br/>
When they heard her statement, the four mutants all looked at her in shock. “You’ve seriously never had a milkshake before?” Sam asked. Illyana just shook her head, and immediately all of her friends began declaring which flavors they thought she would like best. Dani declared that Cookies &amp; Cream was the superior choice, but Rahne and Sam were adamant that chocolate was the best. It was Roberto however that won.<br/>
“I feel like strawberry is the best option for you,” he said matter of factly. Rahne, Dani, and Sam immediately agreed with him, knowing that strawberries were something that Illyana loved to eat at the hospital.<br/>
So the five mutants ordered burgers and milkshakes. Roberto was right, strawberry milkshakes really were the best option for Illyana. They may be her new favorite food. The five mutants sat there talking and laughing as they ate their food. At one point, Roberto said something really flirtatious to Illy, and everyone threw their fries at him. They told funny stories from their childhoods, laughed about dumb stuff they did in the hospital, and joked about how Dani and Rahne were attached at the hip. They were having so much fun, they almost forgot that they were not regular teenagers.<br/>
But then someone pulled up a chair and sat down next to them at the table, and the moment was gone. They were snapped back into the reality of being on the run. The man was huge; he had to be at least six foot seven with a large frame and bulging muscles. He had dark brown hair, brown eyes, and sharp facial features. His eyes seemed to be glued to Illyana, making the blonde feel very uncomfortable.<br/>
Behind him were five other adults: a brunette man wearing red sunglasses, a kind looking red haired woman, a dark skinned woman with white hair, a short man with a permanent scowl on his face, and a very small brunette woman. They were all staring at the young mutants, causing the group to prepare for the possibility that they would have to fight.<br/>
The large mutant leaned in closer to the group. “We need to talk.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>AAAANNNNDDD enter the X-Men. Yayyyy.<br/>I know that this chapter is short and very filler, but it was necessary so that I can transition into the next part of the story. Also, I felt that it was necessary to give Illyana a normal, human teenager moment. So I drew from my own obsession with milkshakes.<br/>Don't worry, the action and drama will be back shortly.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Chapter VII: The Return of Essex Corp</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>The New Mutants and the X-Men face off against Essex Corp</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hey! Sorry I went so long without an update (I know it was only four days, but I feel bad). It's finals week at my college, so I've been so busy and stressed. But I'm almost done with the semester, so I will resume writing regularly. Here is an extra long chapter for making all of you wait.</p><p>This chapter switches between Illyana and Colossus's POVs, so pay attention.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>CHAPTER VII: The Return of Essex Corp</p><p>“Who are you?” Rahne asked with a snarl. Illy could see the brunette’s eyes turning gold--the wolf was out to play.<br/>
The white haired woman stepped closer to the table. If she was scared of the menacing look in Rahne’s eyes, she did not show it. “Allow me to introduce myself,” the woman said. “I am Storm, the big guy in front of you is Colossus, that is Shadowcat,” she gestured to the small brunette woman, “the one with the red glasses is Cyclops, next to him is Jean, and the grumpy man is Wolverine.”<br/>
Roberto shot his friends a confused look. “Where have I heard those names before?”<br/>
“The news, most likely,” Storm replied. “You may know us better as the X-Men.”<br/>
The New Mutants all shared the same look; a look that said ‘are we really going to believe this?’ Dani and Sam seemed to automatically believe them, Roberto seemed unsure, Rahne seemed like she did not trust them, and Illyana was just confused about how she could read her friend’s facial expressions that easily. Finally Rahne broke the silence.<br/>
“Prove it,” the Scottish girl said coldly. Illyana looked at her friend with a mixture of shock and amusement. Since when did Rahne have a mean bone in her body? Still she agreed with the girl’s question, and was about to ask it herself.<br/>
“I beg your pardon,” Storm said with a baffled expression.<br/>
“Prove. It,” Rahne said as her eyes began to glow a brighter gold than before--almost yellow in color. Illyana choked down a laugh, she had to admit she was quite proud of the way that her friend was staring the supposed X-Men down. The X-Men looked quite confused, as if they had never been challenged in this type of manner.<br/>
“Did the doggy stutter?” Illyana asked with a malicious smile. At the sound of her voice, Colossus jumped and returned his gaze to the blonde. He was staring at her almost as if he could not believe that she was real. Illyana decided to ignore the man for now; he was an uncalculated variable that was overcomplicating the current situation. “If you can’t prove it, then I’m going to have to ask you to back off.”<br/>
Illyana decided to join Rahne, and her eyes began to glow ethereal blue. Sam, Dani, and Roberto watched their friends in utter confusion. Both Illy and Rahne had the same cold, analytical look on their faces as they surveyed the uncomfortable mutants in front of them.<br/>
“I never thought I’d see the day that Illy and Rahne joined forces to terrorize people,” Roberto remarked in a tone that was half amused and half nervous. “They’re a lot more terrifying of a duo than I would have imagined.”<br/>
The girls ignored Berto and continued sending a death stare at the X-Men. Illyana was relieved that, for once, she was not the only one having trouble trusting new situations. Her childhood taught her that everyone has an ulterior motive, and that blind trust would lead to her ending up in another cage. Rahne seemed to share that sentiment, even though she had only been in Essex for a little over a year.<br/>
“Fine,” the man with the shades, Cyclops, said. “But not in here. There are too many… people who would not understand.” It was then that Illyana realized that some of the restaurant's customers were glancing at their table nervously and whispering. The glowing blue and gold eyes probably screamed mutant. They would have to go, before word of mutants in Philadelphia reached Essex Corp.<br/>
Illyana was about to voice this concern to her friends, when she felt it. Her senses were going haywire, the air felt colder, and her mind was screaming at her to get out; her powers were telling her that something was near--something bad.<br/>
“Get down,” she said quietly, shocked that Essex had found them so quickly.<br/>
“What?” Shadowcat asked, seemingly shocked at the abrupt change in conversation.<br/>
“Down, now,” Illy said as the glass windows were shattered by syringe-bullets. Everyone screamed as they dove on the ground. Broken glass was everywhere, and Illyana could feel blood running down from a cut on her cheek. Roberto was trying to crawl over to Sam, who's already bad state was worsened by the sound of the loud gunshots. Worst of all was Rahne. Dani was kneeling over her girlfriend, shielding her with her body, but Illyana could still see the damage. Broken glass pierced her skin in multiple places: her cheeks were cut, her arms had multiple pieces coming out of them, and there was a large piece jutting out of her stomach.<br/>
“How did they find us so quickly?” A distressed Dani asked as she held her girlfriend’s hand. Illyana suddenly felt colder than she had in a long time. She turned her gaze to where the X-Men were also on the ground, trying to dodge the bullets.<br/>
“You led them to us,” she snarled. The X-Men looked down, not meeting her eyes; they knew the blonde was right. Colossus looked really sad that Illyana was angry at him. That infuriated her--why the hell did he care? “I’m going to provide a distraction. Get them out of here. I can probably buy us two to three minutes before I get shot.”<br/>
And before any of them could argue with her plan, Illyana disappeared in a flash of blue light.</p><p>**************************************</p><p>Colossus had one of Sam’s arms wrapped around his shoulder; Sam’s other arm was around Roberto. He had offered to help lug the nearly unconscious boy out of the restaurant, and Wolverine had picked up the wolf girl before they all made a run for it. The X-Men and the remaining members of the New Mutants stopped in an alleyway a couple of blocks away to regroup and figure out what to do next.<br/>
“We have to get out of here,” Jean said. “They need medical attention immediately.”<br/>
“We can’t leave without Illyana,” Roberto and Colossus argued simultaneously. Colossus looked at the young mutant and nodded gratefully. He was glad that Illyana had someone in her life that was willing to risk their life to protect her.<br/>
“I’m not saying that we abandon her,” Jean argued, “but we need to get these two to the jet before coming back for her.”<br/>
“No,” Sam groaned in his half-conscious state, “I’ll be alright. We’re not leaving her. She wouldn’t leave us, so we’re not leaving her.”<br/>
“We’ll come back for her,” Jean said softly to the boy. Colossus was about to argue, but before he could, Jean continued. “Besides, we don’t even know where she is at the moment. It could be very hard to track her down.” Jean was quiet for a moment. “They could have already gotten her.”<br/>
“Oh, please,” a voice crooned behind the group, making all of them jump, “if all it took to kill me was some bullets, someone would have succeeded a long time ago.” Illyana Rasputin was leaning against the brick wall right behind all of them. Her right arm was bleeding, and she had blood covering her shirt, but Colossus determined that she was not gravely injured.<br/>
“We’re surrounded on all sides,” the blonde continued in her thick Russian accent. “I count over a hundred. They must be really determined to bring us in, if they went to those lengths.”<br/>
“Can you teleport us all out of here?” Cyclops questioned her.<br/>
“No,” she answered quickly. “Including me, there are eleven people in this group. I have never ported with anywhere close to that many people before. I could end up killing every one of you, or accidentally losing you in some dimension never to be seen again.”<br/>
“Doesn’t seem like a good idea,” Kitty agreed. “So we’re going to have to fight our way to the jet then.”<br/>
“Jet?” Roberto asked.<br/>
Colossus nodded. “We parked it about two miles south of here, but it’s cloaked heavily so it won’t draw attention.”<br/>
“Illy,” the Brazillian boy said, “I know you hate teleporting with other people, but we need to get Sam and Rahne out of here. Can you take them to the jet?”<br/>
“We left our friend Rogue on the jet in case something went wrong,” Kitty added. “She’ll be able to help them.”<br/>
The blonde girl nodded. “I’ll be right back,” she said as she grabbed Rahne and Sam’s arms. She looked Dani and Roberto dead in the eyes. “Don’t you dare die before I get back.” Then she vanished.<br/>
“Okay,” Wolverine said with a grin as his metal claws grew from his hands. “Now that the kids are taken care of, let’s go have some fun.”</p><p>**************************************</p><p>It had not even been five minutes, but the battle was already brutal. Syringe bullets were flying everywhere, and the mutants had to focus a lot of their attention on dodging them. Fortunately for Colossus, he simply just had to enter his metal form and the syringes bounced right off of him. Then it really became about punching and throwing anyone that stood in his way.<br/>
To his right, Jean and Cyclops were working together to take out the Essex soldiers. Cyclops was using his optic blasts to fend them off, while Jean made sure no bullets touched them. To his left, Wolverine was cutting into the soldiers with his claws, and Kitty was phasing through bullets and fists as she fought. Behind him, Roberto’s skin had turned black and he was using his powers to fight off anyone who got close to him or Dani. Together, they were all making a huge dent in Essex’s ranks.<br/>
Even through his metal skin, Colossus could feel the air suddenly becoming cold. The wind became wild and fast, knocking the bullets away from the mutants and the guns out of the soldiers hands. Colossus looked up momentarily to see Storm floating in the sky, her eyes white and storm clouds surrounding her. It looked for a moment like they were going to easily win this fight, but then all of the mutants were suddenly on the ground clutching their ears as a high pitch scream sounded down the street.<br/>
The screaming continued and Colossus looked at his friends to see their ears dripping blood. He found himself once again glad to be made of metal. He looked up and saw one of the most beautiful women he had ever seen in his life. Her hair was black as night, so black that it was almost blue under the streetlights. Her skin was dark and unblemished, and her beautiful body was barely covered in a blue tube dress. She would have been perfect if not for her murderous, blood-red eyes.<br/>
As the woman screamed, visible sound waves exited her mouth at an alarming rate. His ears were hurting so bad that he almost didn’t hear Kitty screaming next to him. Colossus looked at his girlfriend in fear; Kitty Pryde’s ears were dripping with blood. This woman, this Siren, was killing her. Colossus tried to get up, because he was the only one not completely incapacited by the pain in his ears, but the constant soundwaves knocked him back down.<br/>
Fortunately, or rather unfortunately for Colossus, his little sister appeared out of nowhere and slit the Siren’s throat with a small knife. Next to him, the other mutants sighed in relief, but Colossus stared in horror at his little sister. Illyana did not even seem slightly concerned about the fact that she just killed someone. In fact, she looked completely indifferent.<br/>
Illyana raised an eyebrow at the mutants. “I believe I specifically told all of you not to die.”</p><p>**************************************</p><p>The X-Men, along with Illyana, Dani, and Roberto ran down the streets towards the field where the jet was parked. Luckily, when the Siren used her powers, she knocked out the remaining soldiers in that section of the fight. Still, as they ran, they occasionally were confronted by Essex soldiers. Illyana made quick work of them; sometimes the other mutants would help in taking them out, but Illyana found it more efficient to do the killing herself.<br/>
Everytime she killed one of the soldiers, Illyana noticed that Colossus flinched. She chalked it up to him being a do-gooder hero who did not believe in killing. It really was annoying. He kept looking at her like he expected her to be an angel, but Illyana was a lot closer to a demon.<br/>
They were almost to the field when Illyana’s senses rang warning bells in her head. “Wait,” she began, but it was too late. Storm was hit by a blast of purple light and thrown back into the street. In front of them, between them and the jet, were twenty more soldiers ready to fight. This time, all of the soldiers were mutants, and Illyana knew that this fight would be much harder than the last one.<br/>
It started so suddenly, one second both sides were staring at each other, the next the battle was on. Illyana found herself in a fight with the mutant who threw the purple blasts at Storm. Illyana had a lot of respect for Storm for getting up so quickly, because those blasts hurt like a bitch. The man had great reflexes too; everytime Illyana disappeared and reappeared, the man was ready to dodge her sword. It was obvious that her mutant powers were not going to be enough in this case, so she went for her more demonic powers instead.<br/>
“Sanguinem vicissim ut glaciem. Spiritus verto gelu,” the blonde hissed out as her eyes glowed brighter. She felt the power build within her and expand from her to wrap the man in a cocoon of blue energy. Before her eyes, the man slowly froze. His eyes held anguish and fear, but Illyana did not drop her gaze until he was frozen solid. “Conlidam quasi vitrum.” Illyana watched as the ice began to break and the remains of the man crumbled away at her feet.<br/>
She turned her head to find her next victim to find that the other soldiers were quickly moving away from her. “Oh, come on,” Illyana mocked. “Didn’t your mama ever teach you not to run from a teleporter.” And the chase was on.<br/>
Illyana made quick work of the next four mutants, but everyone else seemed to be struggling in the fight, but then Dani had an absolutely awful idea.<br/>
“Hey, Cyclops,” Dani shouted. “I’m so sorry. You are going to hate this, but you’re terrified of snakes.”<br/>
“Dani,” Illyana shouted, “don’t you dare.” But a twenty foot cobra appeared in front of the mutants.<br/>
“What the f-” Cyclops began before he jumped out of the way as the cobra lunged for the mutant soldier next to him. The remaining soldiers began to fire at the snake, but Illyana knew from experience that their powers were worthless against Dani’s mirages. The snake began to swallow soldiers whole and took joy in hitting them with its tail. It took a moment for Illyana’s shock to go away, but when it did, she began to help the snake to take out the remaining soldiers. It took less than a minute for the rest of the soldiers to be dead on the ground.<br/>
“Well,” Dani began, “that turned out a lot better than I expected.”<br/>
Illyana could not help but laugh at the proud look on Dani’s face, the confused looks on the X-Men’s faces, and the look of sheer terror on Cyclops’s face.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>"Sanguinem vicissim ut glaciem. Spiritus verto gelu" = "Blood turn to ice. Breath turn to frost"<br/>"Conlidam quasi vitrum" = "Shatter like glass"</p><p>Idk any actual spells that Illyana uses in the comics, so I'm making up my own stuff.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Chapter VIII: It’s Not a Hospital, It’s A Med Bay</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>The New Mutants are taken to the Xavier School For Gifted Youngsters, and Illyana bonds with Dani.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hi! I'm so so so so SOOOO sorry. I know last chapter I said I was going to update regularly, and then I disappeared for over a week. The first two days was because I had to finish finals, and then I got really sick. And I'm not talking like "Oh I had the sniffles." I'm talking I could not even watch TV or listen to music without wanting to die sick.<br/>So I had a very bad virus (not covid thankfully) that killed me for a few days. Luckily, I'm feeling better now so I am back. I will be sure to start updating consistently again.<br/>Again, I am so sorry. Here is the long awaited 8th chapter.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>CHAPTER VIII: It’s Not a Hospital, It’s A Med Bay</p><p>The second the jet landed at Xavier’s School for Gifted Youngsters, the young mutants were rushed to the med bay to assess their conditions. Rahne was still unconscious, but Rogue had succeeded at patching her up and stopping the bleeding. Rahne would still need stitches, and she would not be able to shift into a wolf for a few days, but Illyana was relieved to hear that she would be alright.<br/>
Rogue and Jean put their full focus on patching up Rahne the moment they got into the med bay. They treated her in a separate room from the other mutants, but the walls were glass, so they could all see their friend. Shadowcat, who Illyana had learned was actually named ‘Kitty’, had quickly observed Sam and determined that he had a severe concussion. Luckily, he would also be alright after a lot of rest and a bunch of pain medicine. After Kitty assessed Sam, she quickly began to clean the cut on Dani’s head and gave her stitches. She also offered to stitch the cut on Illyana’s arm, but the blonde declined. Instead, she grabbed the cleaning supplies and needle and played doctor on herself.<br/>
She’d had a lot of practice stitching herself up over the years, so it was no problem with her. Besides, she would never let some strange woman that she had just met get too close to her while she was injured. She had had her fair share of doctors and adults who did not have her best interest at heart; she would rather have scars than get burned again. Illyana winced as she began to stitch up her arm, but she refused to ask for help.<br/>
“Are you sure you don’t want Kitty to do that?” Colossus asked in a worried tone. Illyana just ignored him. The man was really getting on her nerves; he seemed to be obsessed with her existence and would not leave her alone. He had been practically glued to her side from the moment that they got off of the jet. She promised Roberto that she would not stab any of the X-Men, but she was really tempted to break that promise whenever the metal man opened his mouth.<br/>
“Illy can take care of herself,” Berto assured. “Besides, we don’t have the greatest history with hospitals.”<br/>
It was awkwardly quiet after that. Illyana finally finished stitching her arm and began to clean the cut on her cheek; she was very thankful that the cut would not require stitches. Even with all the scars that littered her body, she had yet to have a scar on her face. The men who had her would never dare ruin her face. It would ruin the view, and her looks were one of their favorite things about her. Even after having killed all of those men and separating herself from that situation, Illyana still could not bear the thought of something happening to her face. It was the only good thing about herself.<br/>
She was pretty. That was the only thing that mattered in the eyes of people. She could be evil and broken beyond repair as long as she had a pretty face.<br/>
As the blonde looked at herself in the mirror, she struggled to find the beauty that people often told her about. To her, she just looked empty. Her eyes looked sunken and full of a cold despair. Her skin was too pale after a lifetime of being locked up. She did not look beautiful--she looked like a hollow shell. Like at any moment she could crack.<br/>
Illyana was so absorbed in her reflection, that she did not hear that conversation had resumed behind her. Dani and Berto were telling the story of their time in the hospital and how they had escaped Essex Corp. They were explaining how Dani used her mirage powers to summon a demon bear that ate the doctor.<br/>
“I still can’t believe you’re the one that got to kill Reyes,” Illyana teased, deciding to join the conversation. “You were there the least amount of time, and yet you got the satisfaction of feeding her to a bear.” The blonde girl sent her friend a sly smile, letting her know that she was not actually mad. While Illyana would have liked to kill Dr. Reyes, she was glad that at least it had been one of her friends. And, besides, she could not picture a better death in her head than the demon bear destroying her shields and swallowing her whole. Absolutely beautiful; ten out of ten death.<br/>
“Well, I didn’t mean to kill her,” Dani defended herself, although she did not seem to feel too guilty about killing the doctor. “It just kind of happened. Anyways, after the bear killed Reyes, I passed out, and the bear decided that it would try to kill us now.”<br/>
“Yeah,” Berto muttered, “thanks for that by the way.”<br/>
Dani blushed and muttered a quiet apology. “So Illyana and Lockheed went to fight the bear to buy time for me to wake up and stop my illusions. And then Sam--”<br/>
“Wait,” Kitty interrupted, “who is Lockheed?”<br/>
“My dragon,” the blonde answered defensively. She did not like it when people questioned her best friend. She especially hated it when people assumed that he was a puppet, so the blonde girl began to glare so everyone got the hint to keep their mouths shut. She pulls the dragon out of her back pocket, and Colossus’ eyes seemed to hold some sort of recognition. “I promised him I would allow him to be in physical form when we got away from prying eyes. I guess this is good enough.”<br/>
The blonde allowed her eyes to glow blue and let her powers flow into the plush dragon puppet, and Lockheed shifted into physical form. Her beautiful dragon nuzzled itself against her hand and curled up next to her on the hospital bed. The dragon looked at her happily before looking up and growling. Illyana followed Lockheed’s gaze to see the X-Men staring at the dragon in shock.<br/>
“Th-that’s a dragon,” Kitty stated with a dumbstruck look on her face.<br/>
“Yes,” Illyana said curtly, “it is.”<br/>
“But a real dragon,” Colossus voiced incredulously.<br/>
Illyana was really rethinking that promise to Roberto.<br/>
“Sorry,” Kitty added, “I’m just really curious as to how you made him into a real dragon.”<br/>
Illyana shrugged. “I wanted him to be real, so he is real.”<br/>
The two X-Men seemed at loss for words, so they decided to carry on. They had brought clothes for the young mutants to change into and some bathroom supplies so they could wash up. Dani, Roberto, and Illy decided to take turns showering since Sam and Rahne were both still passed out. Roberto had called first shower, but Illyana simply teleported in front of him and went into the bathroom first.<br/>
“Cheater,” Roberto shouted through the door causing Illyana to smile softly.<br/>
Despite her desire to give Berto a hard time and take over the bathroom, Illyana took a quick shower before brushing her teeth. She did not want to take a long time in the bathroom while she was in a strange, unknown place. When she walked out, she overheard Kitty and Colossus talking in hushed voices about how he should “wait until tomorrow to tell her.” Whatever that meant.<br/>
The X-Men left the room to give the group some privacy and allow them to sleep. Soon, all three of the young mutants had finished washing up and were getting into their “not-hospital” beds. Lockheed curled up next to Illyana, and told her goodnight.</p><p>**************************************</p><p>Illyana woke up from her usual nightmares when she felt a prodding in her brain. She shot up abruptly and turned her head to the probable source of this mental invasion.<br/>
Dani was writhing in her bed. Her dark hair was fanned out around her, and her fists were clenching the sheets. It was obvious that she was having a nightmare and her powers were latching onto any source of fear.<br/>
The blonde quickly teleported over to her friend. “Dani.” She shook her. “Dani!” She shook her again. Finally the blonde decided that she would have to do this the hard way. She slapped Dani in the face. It felt really good to slap Dani for a second, but that second passed really quick when Dani shot up like a bottle rocket and their heads collided.<br/>
“Блядь,” Illy cursed in her mother tongue. That was definitely unpleasant.<br/>
“Illy,” Dani exclaimed. “What the hell?”<br/>
“Hey!” The blonde argued. “Don’t ‘what the hell’ me. You’re the one that was trying to get into my head and summon my nightmares.”<br/>
The dark haired girl paled. “Oh gosh… I’m so sorry. I didn’t even realize it.”<br/>
Illyana looked at the ashamed and scared look on the younger girl's face, and, for once in her life, she did not feel like making the situation worse with mean words. “That’s alright,” she said softly. “You will get the hang of it eventually.”<br/>
“How do you know that for sure?” Dani asked miserably.<br/>
“Because we all do. You’re still new at this. Your powers have not had a chance to settle yet, and you have not had a chance to explore them. We all go through a rough period at first. When I first mutated, every time I would sneeze I would teleport a couple of feet from my current position.”<br/>
Dani laughed at that, real laughter. Illyana was glad that one of her only childhood anecdotes that wasn’t depressing was enough to cheer up her friend. It was good to know that her past did not just hold misery.<br/>
Dani sighed. “I guess I should stay awake for the rest of the night. I don’t want to risk getting into Berto’s head next.” Illyana looked over to where the Brazillian boy was lying down. Somehow, even with all the noise, he was still passed out on the bed. She suppressed a smirk at how deeply he was sleeping; at least one of them was not uncomfortable in the new environment. Illyana sat herself down on Dani’s bed.<br/>
“Alright, I’ll stay up with you,” the Russian girl said. When Dani was about to protest, she cut her off. “I don’t sleep long anyways. My nightmares were a sign that I was about to wake up and spend the night staring at the ceiling, so it really is no trouble.”<br/>
Dani seemed to relax at that, and scooted over so Illyana could lie down next to her. Illyana was shocked; she had not expected such a mundane gesture. It felt like Dani was showing her in a subtle way that Illyana was her friend too. And despite all of her fears, Illyana for once did not want to run from happiness.<br/>
So she laid her head down next to Dani, and listened to the younger girl tell her childhood stories for the rest of the night. Illyana did not add anything to the conversation other than laughter and some teasing remarks, but the conversation was good.<br/>
She felt good.<br/>
She felt human.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. Chapter IX: Discoveries</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>The New Mutants go to speak with Charles Xavier.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>CHAPTER IX: Discoveries</p>
<p>The following morning was eventful. All of the young mutants, except for Rahne who was on bed rest, had to go to a meeting with Professor Xavier first thing in the morning. Illyana was pouting and dragging her feet. There is nothing she would not rather do than sit in a room with a judgemental telepath and tell her life story. But apparently she did not have a say in the matter, and Roberto told her that everything would be fine.<br/>
So that’s how Illyana found herself waiting in the professor’s office along with Dani, Berto, and a half-conscious Sam. For the life of her, Illyana could not figure out why Sam was essential to this meeting; the poor boy was so heavily concussed that he likely would not remember any conversations that would happen. However, everytime one of the group would voice these concerns, Sam would wave them off and say that he was fine… but it was hard to believe him when his words were so slurred.<br/>
After what felt like an eternity of waiting, but was actually probably only three minutes, Professor Xavier wheeled into his office followed closely by Storm and Cyclops. They asked the usual questions: How did you end up as prisoner’s in Essex Corp? How did you escape? What are your powers? And so on. Illyana completely stopped paying attention within the first five minutes of the meeting. She was still annoyed that she had to be in this meeting in the first place, and she was even more mad that she was not allowed to bring Lockheed with her. Fortunately, her dragon was not too upset, and he decided to spend the time protecting Rahne from further harm. Despite the fact that Lockheed was not mad at the arrangement, Illyana was livid. She always had him with her when she was in an uncomfortable environment, and she had come to rely on his comfort to get her through awkward situations.<br/>
“Illyana?” The professor asked, dragging the blonde girl out of her thoughts.<br/>
“Hmm?” She responded with a raised eyebrow. She was not even going to pretend like she was paying attention to this conversation.<br/>
“I asked if you could tell me how you ended up in Essex Corp.”<br/>
Suddenly memories flashed before her eyes. Smiling demons; bright red eyes; her younger self screaming as she was dragged to a different dimension; her screams as her captor stole piece after piece of her soul; the first time she ever killed; blood spewing out of the man’s mouth as he choked on his own blood; fire; scars; pain.<br/>
Nothing but pain.<br/>
That’s all her life had been, and Essex Corp. took advantage of her in her weakest moments to bring her more pain. She would never have a break from it. And she could not bring herself to admit all the trauma she had been through.<br/>
“No,” she answered simply, “I can not.”<br/>
The professor tried to press further, but she kept her mouth shut and sent him a bored, cold glance. She made sure her expression screamed ‘I am done with this conversation.’ But then she felt that prodding in her head; like a pressure sneakily trying to get past all of her mental defenses. In a fit of quiet rage, Illyana used her power to increase her mental barriers; there was no way she was going to let him into her mind. She did not care how much trouble she got in, she did not want anyone in her head no matter what. There was too much wrong in there.<br/>
After not being able to get anywhere with his mind reading and realizing that he was on Illyana’s last nerve, the professor sighed. “I guess that’s all for now,” he said. “You will all be getting a full check up later today to make sure that you are all in good shape. For now feel free to roam the grounds, but be sure not to go too far. We don’t know what Essex Corp. will be willing to try.”<br/>
“They seem to be willing to try a lot,” Roberto grumbled. “I still can’t believe that they sent that many people after us. Seems like a bit of an overkill.”<br/>
“Well, who can blame them after what you guys did in West Virginia,” Scott said. The four young mutants sent each other confused looks.<br/>
“What do you mean what we did in West Virginia?” Dani asked in a confused tone. “We barely got out of there with our lives.”<br/>
Now it was the X-Men’s turn to be confused. Cyclops, Storm, and the Professor were silent for a moment, and Illyana figured that they were having a telepathic conversation. Cyclops opened a drawer in the desk and pulled out a folder. He opened the folder and pulled out a large photograph. Illyana recognized the site of the first battle with Essex Corp. There were bodies lying everywhere-- way more bodies than her and her friends had left behind. They were surrounding a circle that was burnt into the ground, right where her and her friends had been before they teleported away.<br/>
“What the hell happened there,” Illy voiced her confusion.<br/>
“I think you did,” Roberto said in awe. Illyana was about to protest about how she was powerful but not that powerful, when Roberto elaborated. “It had to be you. Dani, Sam, and Rahne were unconscious. You saw me get knocked down, and you started glowing. I had never seen anything like it. When you blew, we were suddenly in Limbo, so I assumed that you just teleported us, but you must have given off some sort of energy to knock back the attackers.”<br/>
Illyana sat there in stunned silence. She was used to being more powerful than she could handle, but she had never done anything on this level without her knowledge. But then again maybe she had; whenever she emergency teleported away from a situation, she never came back to see what she left behind. It’s very possible that she had left a lot more bodies behind over the years than she thought.<br/>
It was at this moment that Illyana realized that she had lost count of how many people she killed. This thought freaked the blonde out. She was fine with her eighteen; she knew who she killed and why she did it. But now she had completely lost track of what she had done. Sure those people were attacking her, but she didn’t even think twice about killing them. After seeing all of those bodies and knowing what she did in the last two battles, she knew that her kill count had to be over fifty. She had taken fifty lives. Illyana suddenly felt really cold; not physically, but mentally. Whenever her thoughts got too scary or guilt creeped up on her, Illyana tended to shut down. It was easier not to feel anything than to feel bad.<br/>
She also noticed something else that made her blood run cold. There was a body missing. A certain telekinetic, telepathic, pink sword wielding bitch was not among the dead. She was still out there, and something told Illyana that she’d be back for revenge.<br/>
With her cold attitude back, she finally decided to address what Roberto said. Everyone in the room had been staring at her as she contemplated this revelation. “Well,” she finally said, “that’s new.”<br/>
After some more awkward silence, the professor finally dismissed them, but Illyana knew that she would be questioned more during her ‘check up.’ The four mutants quickly stood up and rushed out of the office. None of them had any plans to explore at the moment; they were all going to go sit with Rahne and try to cheer her up. It was never said out loud, but Illyana knew that was the plan. In this short time, they had become inseparable. They were all pretty codependent on each other, but that did not seem like such a bad thing to Illy who had never been able to depend on anyone.<br/>
Roberto had his hand on Illyana’s arm as they walked down the stairs, and the blonde did not mind at all. She knew that he was just trying to calm her down after finding out that she accidentally caused so much destruction. She knew that he was showing his support and telling her that they were not mad at her. Roberto understood her, and he knew not to ask how she felt, but to comfort her anyways.<br/>
While Roberto’s touch was welcome, the next touch was not. Illyana had to keep herself from immediately going on the offensive when someone lightly touched her shoulder as they walked down the hallway. Her mind immediately flashed to other places she had been touched without her consent, and she wanted to crawl into a hole and hide. She quickly shook the hand off and turned her head to see Colossus standing there awkwardly.<br/>
“Do you mind if we talk?” The tall man asked.<br/>
Yes. Illyana did in fact mind. She minded a lot, but he looked so desperate and scared that she almost felt bad for the older man. She looked back at her friends, silently asking them what they should do. Sam just shrugged at her, and Dani raised her eyebrows as if to say ‘Why not?’. Roberto simply tilted his head slightly and looked her in the eyes, but Illyana still knew exactly what he was trying to say. ‘Whatever you think is right.’<br/>
So, despite her initial reluctance, Illyana followed Colossus down the hallway thinking that, at the very least, she could finally figure out why he kept trying to be close to her.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>DUN DUN DUN<br/>So, Psylocke is still alive. Also, Illyana realizes that she has a lot more power than she realizes, which is scary because she already had a lot of power.<br/>Plus, you may have noticed me mention another comic book character. It was a real blink and you'll miss it, but there may be a certain demon that will be a part of Illyana's back story...this demon's name may start with a 'B' and end with a 'elasco'...<br/>And get ready for the next chapter, because the Rasputin Family Drama will finally join the plot.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0010"><h2>10. Chapter X: Orphan</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Piotr gives Illyana some shocking news.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>CHAPTER X: Orphan</p>
<p>Illyana perched herself on the edge of the gray leather chair; she positioned herself so she appeared unassuming, but, if need be, she could jump up to run or fight very easily. It’s not that she perceived Colossus as a threat, but she did not want to take the chance that she was wrong in her judgement of him. Besides, the way he acted around her put her on edge. She would rather be safe than sorry.<br/>
Colossus was pacing back and forth in the small, private room he had led them to. Every once in a while he would stop and open his mouth to start talking, but then he would shake his head and keep pacing. Illyana would generally be amused at such a large man being so anxious, but for some reason his nervousness was making her nervous as well. What could he possibly have to tell her that was so horrible? Was he about to confess to mass murder? Or that he had robbed a bank? Illyana decided that it could not possibly be either of those two options because those had nothing to do with her.<br/>
Finally he stopped pacing and spoke quickly, as if he were vomiting out his words. “I was born in Russia.”<br/>
Illyana simply rolled her eyes. “Uh-huh,” she said.<br/>
Colossus stilled. “You don’t sound surprised.”<br/>
“You have an accent,” Illyana stated as she rolled her eyes a second time. Was this about both of them being Russian? Was he seriously looking to bond with her because they both come from the same country? He was about to be sorely disappointed when he realized that she did not have any real memories of Russia, besides being locked in a cage.<br/>
It took him a moment to recover from his embarrassment before he started again. “My name is Piotr,” he explained. “Well, everyone here calls me Peter, because Americans are horrible at pronouncing things and I gave up. But that shouldn’t be much of an issue for you because you’re fr-” he realized he was rambling and stopped himself. “My name is Piotr Rasputin.”<br/>
Illyana stilled. She felt that cold feeling creep back into her heart. What kind of game was he playing?<br/>
“When I was young,” he continued, “my parents always hated mutants. When my older brother’s powers manifested, they sent him away to the Russian military to die. And then when mine came, I was only fifteen so they could not send me to the military. So they just kicked me out. Luckily Professor Xavier found me, but I still had to leave everything behind; my home, my friends, and my little sister.”<br/>
Illyana stilled. He needed to stop talking right now. She felt a sharp pain in her chest where her heart was, and she noticed that her hands were shaking slightly. She couldn’t control it.<br/>
Despite her discomfort, he continued on with his story. “I was planning to visit as often as I could. I did not want to leave her behind, but I did because I thought she would be safe. I never imagined that my parents would get rid of her,” he paused momentarily. “I-I never imagined that they would get rid of you.”<br/>
“So, what are you saying?” Illyana asked coldly. Her voice sounded shaky even to her own ears. She knew exactly what he was insinuating. She just did not want to believe it. She could not believe it.<br/>
“You’re my sister,” he said softly. His eyes held so much hope, but hers held nothing but anxiety. Her heart was racing, her hands were shaking, and she could feel that familiar magical bubble building in her chest; the same one that always arose whenever she was distressed.<br/>
“No,” she said defensively. “No, I’m not.”<br/>
Piotr looked sad at her response, but he was obviously not surprised. “I know this is a lot to take in, but I’ve been looking for you for over a decade. And here you are. моя маленькая снежинка.”<br/>
He said the last part quietly. So quietly in fact that Illyana almost didn’t understand him. But she did.<br/>
<em>My little snowflake.</em><br/>
Suddenly memories flashed into her mind. They were so blurry, and she could not be sure if they were actually real or not. The memories were almost nothing; just of her as a young child laughing. There was a teenage boy with dark hair laughing with her. He was reading her bedtime stories, then playing with her in the mud, then helping her build a snowman.<br/>
Her head hurt and her shaking got worse. She had never thought about her life before she was taken. She always instilled in herself that if she did not have anywhere to go back to, then being stuck in her own personal Hell would not be as bad. She could survive it if she did not have anything to miss; no childhood to look back to and certainly no brother coming to her rescue. She couldn’t breathe. She needed to get away from him.<br/>
She stumbled over her feet as she backed up. Illyana did not even remember standing up, but she was suddenly on her feet and desperately putting some distance between her and Piotr. Her breaths were quick and shallow, and she realized that the edge of her vision was turning blue. Her eyes were probably flickering between blue and brown in her panic. Her hands started tingling as her magic flared up to defend her against whatever was making her so anxious.<br/>
“Where were you?” She finally spoke. Her voice was deathly quiet. After a moment of no answer, she repeated her question. This time louder, until she was almost screaming. “Where were you? If you were supposedly my brother, then where were you when I needed a brother?”<br/>
“We looked everywhere for you,” he pleaded desperately. “We tracked down the men that took you, but they were already dead. The professor even tried to find you with his mutant tracking machine Cerebro, but it was all dead ends. You were nowhere to be found.”<br/>
“Bullshit!” She was screaming now. Her anger was pulsing through her and making her unable to control her volume. “I was somewhere to be found. You just didn’t find me.” Everything in her vision was glowing blue now. She needed to get out of there before her magic got too out of control.<br/>
She turned to storm out the door, when he grabbed her arm to stop her. Big mistake. Between her already heightened emotional state and her issues with being touched, her magic spiraled out of control. “Don’t touch me,” she shouted, her voice coming out deep and demonic. She saw a flash of blue, then all of a sudden, all the glass in the room shattered: the vases, the picture frames, even the windows. It all shattered and exploded throughout the room.<br/>
She looked around horrified at what she had done. There was no way that they would let her stay with the others after she caused this much damage. She had ruined everything. Just like she always did.<br/>
“Illya-” her brother began, but she teleported herself to Limbo before he had a chance to finish.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0011"><h2>11. Chapter XI: Sparks</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Illyana looks back on her terrible past.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>CHAPTER XI: Sparks</p>
<p>Illyana laid on the ground in Limbo. Her heart was heavy and aching, her head was spinning, but at least she had stopped shaking. She stopped moving at all. She could not bring herself to sit up or even curl into a more comfortable position. So she just continued lying on the ground, her back beginning to ache as much as her heart, and thought about her life.<br/>Most of her life was blurry; mere flashes of pain and sorrow that she had spent years blocking out. She had done everything she could to block out her entire past, but the worst memories never seemed to go away. And now, as she was lying on the ground, they flashed through her mind once more.<br/>She did not remember much of the day she was taken. She remembered screaming for her mama at the top of her lungs as she was pulled further and further away from her. Her mother just stood there; even as a child, Illyana could tell that her mama did not care anymore. This fact just caused her to scream louder and louder, hoping to win her mama’s love back.<br/>She vividly remembered the day the smiley men came for her. Despite being only four years old, the traumatic memory had ingrained itself into her memory. The men who had taken her threw her at the feet of the demons. Bloody and scared, she had done nothing but lie on the ground waiting to be hurt again. But the smiley men did not hurt her--not yet anyways. They went straight for the men and tore them limb from limb right in front of the terrified young girl.<br/>Illyana remembered the blood running down their bodies. One man’s eye was gouged out, and he was still alive, screaming and slowly bleeding to death in front of her. She remembered the exact moment he stopped fighting for life and just succumbed to the darkness. And now, thirteen years later, she found herself jealous that he had found some sort of peace.<br/>The next two years felt like Hell to the young blonde, but she did not know what pain was yet. The smiley men beat her and drugged her everyday. They would always mutter to each other about triggering her powers, leaving her confused and more scared.<br/>She remembered the nights that she would lie awake. She would wrap her arms tight around Lockheed, the only thing that the men let her keep from home. In her mind, to save herself from the pain, she would picture a place where they would be safe. A beautiful red world where only she existed and Lockheed was free to fly around and play with her. She went there so often, it eventually became real.<br/>It was the only good memory from her nightmare of a childhood. When young Illyana opened her eyes and found herself in the beautiful red world, she thought that she was dreaming again. Still, she was joyful for the temporary break from reality, and she ran around her world. Lockheed flew next to her and enjoyed being free. For a moment they were free. Unfortunately, freedom never lasted long.<br/>Some of the red dust got into her nose, and she sneezed. Since she was so young and could not control her powers, any sudden change of her body sent her teleporting away. She found herself back in her room. The smiley men surrounded her, and she could not figure out why. That is, until she looked down and saw her body covered in red dirt. That was the first time she had taken herself to Limbo.<br/>She had thought that the smiley men would be mad, but they seemed delighted. At the time, she was just happy to avoid a punishment, but they were just moving onto the next phase. The worst phase. The phase that robbed her of her innocence, her humanity, and most of her soul. In real time, she began to shake again. Panic welled up in her chest, and involuntary tears streamed down her face. Her distress was the proper motivation to finally sit up.<br/>Even in her worst state, she could not bring herself to think about what happened next. That was a certain type of pain that needed to stay buried. The smiley men could stay haunting her day in and day out, but Belasco would remain where he could not hurt her. She still dreamed about him almost every night, but she could wake up from dreams; she could not wake up from her thoughts.<br/>Her thoughts were swarming her brain. She was overwhelmed and slowly drowning in a sea of hurt. She wished that she had brought Lockheed with her. Her dragon would know how to calm her down. He knew every detail about what happened to her, and he knew how to stop her from thinking of it. Unfortunately, he was off with her friends. She would have to sneakily go and grab him before she left for good.<br/>The thought of leaving made her heart sink. She had finally found people willing to put up with her; people that she wanted to be around. She had found friends that understood that she was a mess, and cared about her anyway. But, of course, her past always found a way to catch up with her and ruin everything.<br/>She always ruined everything.<br/>And now she would have to be alone again. For the first time, she did not want to be along.<br/>“Illy,” she heard a voice say, snapping her out of her destructive thoughts. She stood up with a confused expression, no one else had access to Limbo. After a moment of silence, she shook it off. It must just be her head messing with her.<br/>“Illy!” The voice said ever louder. “Illyana!” She knew that voice. All the destructive thoughts in the world couldn’t make her not want to talk to him, so she found herself opening a portal and stepping back into New York.</p>
<p>**************************************</p>
<p>Roberto was wandering around the grounds of the Xavier Institute, desperately hoping to see any trace of yellow blonde hair. He needed to find her, to make sure that she did not run off alone. She couldn’t be alone anymore, and she didn’t have to be.<br/>“Illy,” Roberto called. He had been running around calling her name like an idiot for over an hour. He felt ridiculous, he didn’t even know if she could hear him. If she was in Limbo, it was possible that she was completely cut off from this world. However, his feelings did not stop him from shouting, just in case she did eventually hear him.<br/>“Illy,” he shouted again. “Illyana!” He stopped and looked around desperately, thinking about where to search next. Suddenly there was a flash of blue light, and a familiar blonde haired girl appeared a few yards away from him, with her back turned towards him. Roberto ran towards her but slowed as he neared her. He could tell just by the way she had curled into herself that she had been crying.<br/>“Hey,” he began softly as he sat himself down next to her.<br/>“Hey,” she said back, her voice hoarse from tears. It was quiet for a moment. “He’s my brother.”<br/>He simply nodded. “Yeah, I heard. So, what are you going to do about that?”<br/>Illyana seemed to get even sadder with the question. “I guess I have to go,” she said solemnly. “I’m so sorry. You guys really wanted this to work, but I ruined everything.”<br/>“What are you talking about?” Roberto asked incredulously. “You didn’t ruin anything.”<br/>“I destroyed the entire room,” Illyana pointed out.<br/>“Yeah,” Roberto admitted, “you did, but no one blames you for that. This is a school for mutants, apparently explosions happen all the time. And besides, they all know that you were upset.”<br/>“So, they are letting me stay?” She asked with a confused look.<br/>“Yes, they are,” He said, but then he looked at the anxious look on her face and continued. “Is that what you want? Do you want to stay?”<br/>“I-I don’t know,” she said with a shrug. “I really don't. I know I want to stay with you guys, but I don’t need a brother. I don’t need anything from my past.”<br/>“Okay,” Roberto said firmly. “If that’s how you feel, if you want to leave, we’ll leave with you.”<br/>“What?”<br/>“You heard me. We already discussed it; me, Sam, Rahne, and Dani. If you need to leave, we’re coming with you.”<br/>“But you guys are safe here, and you li-”<br/>“We’re staying together,” he cut her off. He scooted closer to her and wrapped her arm around her shoulder. “It’s the five of us against the world.”<br/>Illyana leaned her head on his shoulder and scooted even closer to him. For a couple of minutes, they sat like that, curled up in one another and staring at the sunny sky. They were completely silent, but the silence was not awkward, it was comfortable.<br/>“Alright,” Illyana said, breaking the silence. “We’re staying. I want to stay for you, and Dani, and Sam, and Rahne.”<br/>He looked into her eyes and saw determination to stay. He saw more emotion than he had ever seen from the girl. Her big brown eyes were looking at him, and he felt hypnotized by her gaze. Where their skin touched, he felt sparks dancing around his skin. He felt electrified.<br/>He wondered if she felt it too.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Not me listening to Sparks Fly by Taylor Swift and getting inspired....</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0012"><h2>12. Chapter XII: New Experiences</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>The New Mutants decide to try their hands at being normal teenagers.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hey so I changed the formatting for this story because I think it will make it easier to read. I may go back and change the way all of the chapters are formatted soon.</p><p>Also, quick note: I will not be writing in accents. I will mention that a character has an accent, but I will not change the way that certain words are written to depict the accent. I just do not know enough about different accents and cultures to do it properly, so I would rather not do it at all. So characters like Illyana, Piotr, Rahne, etc. will be written as speaking similarly to everyone else. (Just in case anyone got confused.)<br/>The only character that will kind of have the accent written is Sam. This is because I am also southern, so I feel comfortable writing a southern accent. I honestly have to go back and correct everyone else’s speech and stop myself from saying “y’all” and writing triple contractions like “shouldn’t’ve”.</p><p>Anyways, enjoy the chapter.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>CHAPTER XII: New Experiences</p><p> </p><p>The group developed a new pattern over the next three weeks. They would wake up in the morning and find a quiet place to eat breakfast, just the five of them. Then they would talk about random things until it was time for some of the group to go to school; Roberto did not want to go to classes at first, but eventually he reluctantly joined Dani, Sam, and Rahne. Illyana decided not to go to classes. They would follow morning classes by eating lunch together, then the group would go back to afternoon classes while Illyana explored the house. Then they would eat dinner, and hang out… just the five of them.</p><p>Although there were many options of teenage mutants to talk to, the group was not very socially open. They were nice to people, with the exception of Illyana, but they made it clear that they wanted to be alone. The group had grown remarkably codependent, and while they knew it was unhealthy, they preferred codependence to being hurt again.</p><p>This thought process applied to all methods of being hurt again. While most of the group liked the X-Men, they were all very involved in Illyana’s plot of avoiding her brother and the rest of the older mutants. It started with Illyana simply teleporting out of the room whenever any of the X-Men came into the room. Eventually, it got to the point where Rahne would hear footsteps in the hallways and warn Illyana. The group would then pretend that they had not seen Illyana in a long time, and this really annoyed the older mutants who knew that they were lying.</p><p>Illyana had no desire to see her brother. Not even slightly. She did not need a brother; she did not need someone to look after her. She learned how to live without him, and there was no room for him in her life. Therefore, she was going to continue teleporting out of the room to avoid any and all interactions with him.</p><p>Fortunately, their lives did not only consist of family drama and classes; the young mutants were gladly enjoying their freedom. While Dani had only been stripped of that right for a little over a week, for the others it had been months or years since they were able to do as they pleased. They took advantage of the lack of curfew and limited socialization hours to be regular teenagers. They played a lot of late night card games, watched really cheesy American movies, and did everything they could not do while at the hospital.</p><p>One thing that the group loved to do was force Illyana to explore new things. It started as a joke; they were playing Never Have I Ever, and Illyana was destroying them because she had never been allowed to do anything. While Illyana was wrapped up in winning, her friends were horrified by how limited her life was. So they jokingly decided to force her to do everything she had not been allowed to do, and the joke slowly shifted to a determination to experience life.</p><p>This is how Illyana found herself sitting on the barstool in the kitchen while her friends made her brownies. Apparently the fact that she had not had basically any dessert in her entire life--or at least several years--was a criminal offense. So her friends were making her a new dessert every couple of days; they started with chocolate chip cookies, which were followed by snickerdoodles, apple pie, cupcakes, and now brownies.</p><p>The smell of chocolate filled her nose, and Illyana found herself really excited to try the treats. She felt a certain delight at how determined her friends were to give her happy memories and good life experiences. Every day, she realized more and more that they were not going to randomly ditch her. They were stuck together, and the blonde could not help but to remember Roberto’s words from a couple weeks before. <em> The five of us against the world. </em></p><p>She could not keep the grin off of her face as Roberto slid into the seat next to her and placed a plate in front of her. The brownie looked rich and gooey, and the Russian girl was practically starving after having to wait. Her friends gathered around as she picked up her fork; they all looked pretty excited to see what her reaction would be. The first time they had done this, Illyana had been wildly uncomfortable, but she eventually got used to them watching her.</p><p>Illyana picked up the fork and brought a bite of the brownie to her mouth. “О боже мой,” she practically moaned as she ate the brownie. Her friends cheered at her happy reaction and high fived each other. They were all acting like huge dorks, but life was going good.</p><p>At least it was, until a voice interrupted them.</p><p>“Wow,” Kitty exclaimed as she walked into the kitchen with Jean in tow, “it smells great in here.”</p><p>The five young mutants immediately tensed. Rahne sent Illyana an apologetic look, but the blonde just shrugged it off. The wolf had been busy being excited and did not hear the footsteps, and Illyana definitely was not going to be mad at her for that. At least it was only Kitty and Jean, and <em> he </em> was not there.</p><p>“I see you made brownies,” Jean said as she looked around the kitchen. “I’m glad that you kids seem to be adjusting well to this new environment.”</p><p>The group simply just nodded, wishing that they would go away. It’s not that they hated Jean and Kitty, it’s just that they felt uncomfortable talking much around people outside of their group.</p><p>“Illyana, it’s good to see you here,” Kitty said with awkward enthusiasm. The poor phaser was obviously trying to bond with the younger girl. “How is your adjustment going?”</p><p>“Fine,” Illyana answered simply before taking another bite of her brownie.</p><p>Kitty waited in awkward silence for a moment, obviously hoping that the blonde would elaborate further, before continuing talking. “Well, I know you guys were given some clothes from other students, but I was sent to ask if there is anything you guys need. We’re hoping to get all of you some more clothes and stuff before the end of the month,” she paused for a moment before looking specifically at Illyana. “Your brother--uh Peter--wanted to know if there was anything you specifically needed, or even just wanted.”</p><p>“No,” Illyana said coldly. “I don’t need anything. Not from him.”</p><p> </p><p>**************************************</p><p> </p><p>After Illyana’s cold statement, the room was filled with awkward silence until Jean and Kitty quickly left the room. The group was immediately at ease, and they grabbed the rest of their brownies and ran upstairs. Dani sat on the floor of the room that she shared with Rahne and Illyana, and she curled up into Rahne. Sam sat across from them as they waited for Illyana and Roberto to come back with whatever game they were going to play that night.</p><p>“Have you guys noticed something going on between Illyana and Roberto?” Dani asked.</p><p>Rahne sat up and moved apart from Dani so that she could talk easier. “I’m glad I’m not the only one who noticed,” the Scottish girl said. “They’ve been so touchy and they keep looking at each other with those big eyes.”</p><p>“I know for a fact Berto likes her,” Sam interjected in his thick southern accent. “I can’t tell y’all how often he talks 'bout her like a love sick fool. I think Illy's just as bad, but in a more secretive way. She's been laughing at every joke he makes. Berto's not that funny, and since when does Illy laugh in a way that isn't sarcastic?”</p><p>“Young love,” Dani said in a mock dreamy voice as she grabbed Rahne’s hand. “They grow up so fast.”</p><p>“Not too fast,” Sam snorted. “Neither of them are ever going to admit it. They’re both too stubborn.”</p><p>“Maybe, they just need a push,” Dani said as she smirked evilly.</p><p>It was then that the three friends decided to plot to make sure that Berto and Illy got together. A relationship was the next item on Illyana's list of new experiences.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>What will their secret plot be?!?!</p><p>I know that this chapter was mostly fluff, but the drama will be back soon.<br/>I may not update very consistently for a few days because I am going to my grandma's house for Christmas and the wifi sucks there. I will still try to post over the break though.</p><p> </p><p>MERRY EARLY CHRISTMAS EVERYBODY!!!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0013"><h2>13. Chapter XIII: Work In Progress</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>The return of the Rasputin family drama.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hi! So Christmas has passed and I haven't posted in a few days. So what does everyone need after the sappy holidays????<br/>Depressing chapters and family drama! Yay!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>CHAPTER XIII: Work In Progress</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Illyana sat on her bed alone with nothing but her thoughts and her colored pencils. She had stolen art supplies from one of the classrooms in the middle of the night. It wasn’t much, just some pencils, paper, and markers, but she was happy. Drawing was the only way for her to express the horrors in her mind without speaking them out loud, and her mind had a lot of horrors.</p>
<p>So she drew. She spent several hours drawing while her friends attended class. She drew all of her anger, sorrow, and misery; she drew her hopes and her fears; she drew violence and peace. The colors scribbled together like a kaleidoscope. To a passerby, the picture would look without purpose, but to Illyana it held more emotion than she would ever be able to express.</p>
<p>Only she knew that the red lines symbolized the blood of the lives she took. Only she knew that the crescent moons were not crescent moons, but smiles waiting in the shadows for her to break down. Only she knew that the black and blue scribbles represented the shadows that haunted her life and the magic that struggled to keep her alive. Only she knew that the red circles were eyes; <em>his</em> eyes: the eyes of a man whose name she could not speak to this day. And only she knew that the strange swirly symbols were <em>his </em>mark. The mark that he carved into her back as she screamed, begged for him to stop.</p>
<p>But he never did.</p>
<p>Illyana put her colored pencils down and held her picture away from her face so she could study it. It was not beautiful, nothing she ever made would be beautiful, but it called to her. It screamed at her in a language only she could understand. As she stared at it, she could almost drown in the pain and sorrow of the past. The only reason she did not drown, was because she had anchored herself away from the emotional storm. She knew that she could not break, or she would never be fixed again.</p>
<p>So instead of breaking down, she stared at her work. The colors and shapes blending together to make a pattern that resembled shattered glass. How fitting to her current situation considering that everything around her crumbles to pieces.</p>
<p>When she could no longer bear looking at it, she quickly shoved it in a drawer. She could never bring herself to destroy any of her work. Even the most painful pieces held so much meaning that she would rather lock them away forever than lose them.</p>
<p>Just as she put the drawing away, her senses screamed at her that she was no longer alone. There was indeed someone else in the room with her.</p>
<p>“What the hell are you doing in here?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“What the hell are you doing in here?” Illyana snapped.</p>
<p>In truth, Piotr did not really know what he was doing there. Kitty had dragged him through the wall because she claimed that he needed to bond with his sister, but Illyana had made it clear that she had no intent to do that.</p>
<p>When Piotr could not answer, his girlfriend answered for him. “We just wanted to see how you were doing,” Kitty said with a warm smile.</p>
<p>“I <em>was</em> doing fine,” Illyana stated in a cold voice.</p>
<p>Kitty’s smile faltered and Piotr just sighed. He had no idea what to do to make Illyana warm up to them. She treated them like a disgusting infestation that the exterminator could not get rid of, but he had to try something. He searched for her for so long, he could not bear the thought of never fixing things.</p>
<p>His eyes caught sight of the art supplies that were sitting on her bed. “I see that you have found a way to entertain yourself,” he said as he sat on the edge of her bed. Illyana only crossed her arms and leaned against the wall. After a few moments of silence, Piotr decided to try again. “Have you decided when you’re going to begin to attend classes? I know American schools are very weird and different, it took me a while to figure stuff out, but you can catch on quick.”</p>
<p>This seemed to be the wrong thing to say. He thought his presence was enough to get on every one of her nerves, but apparently, she had a few left for him to get on. Her fists clenched, her arms were shaking slightly, and, for a split second, the look of cold indifference on her face transformed into one of hurt.</p>
<p>“No,” she said suddenly, “I’m not going to classes.”</p>
<p>Piotr and Kitty frowned. “Why not?” Kitty asked. “Are you having trouble with English? Because there are a lot of people her who are not from America, and we have people who can help you with the language.”</p>
<p>Illyana only seemed angrier, and Piotr noticed that the air felt a lot colder than it did a minute ago. At this point, Piotr heard the door open, but he did not pay any attention to it.</p>
<p>“Why don’t you just try it?” Piotr suggested kindly, trying to break the tension. He did not understand why this conversation was aggravating his sister so much. Did she really hate him so much that a few minutes of conversation would set her off? “You will probably like classes if you give them a chance. But if you do hate them, no one will make you continue. Why not just try? What’s the worst that can happen?”</p>
<p>As he finished speaking, he saw her walls begin to crack. Her face fell, her shaking worsened, and he saw panic in her eyes. But before he could do anything, she disappeared in a flash of blue light.</p>
<p>“What the fuck did you just do?” A boy’s voice shouted from behind him. Kitty and Piotr turned around to see Dani, Rahne, Sam, and a very angry Roberto standing in the doorway. Roberto stormed into the room and got right into Piotr’s face, his hands angrily clenching around his notebook. “What do you think you are doing?”</p>
<p>“We were just talking to her,” Piotr defended himself. “I did not know that she would get so angry and defensive.”</p>
<p>“That’s because you don’t know a damn thing about her,” Roberto seethed. “You’re so wrapped in your own world, with your head up your ass, that you did not stop pushing her when she got uncomfortable.”</p>
<p>“I was just trying to fix th-“</p>
<p>“Exactly,” Roberto cut him off. “You were trying to <em>f</em>ix things. Despite what you, the professor, and even Illyana believe, she is not broken. She does not need to be fixed. So quit trying.” His hand turned black, and the notebook that was clenched in his fists caught fire.</p>
<p>“Berto,” Rahne exclaimed as she quickly threw the cup of water she had been holding at the fire, extinguishing the flames.</p>
<p>Piotr was silenced with shame, so Kitty decided to defend him. “We were just trying to get her to open up and maybe start classes.” All four of the young mutants scoffed at her statement.</p>
<p>Piotr’s frown furthered at their reactions to Illyana going to school. “What?” He asked in a confused tone. “Has she said something to you?”</p>
<p>“’Course not,” Sam snapped. “Illy’s never been one for sharing. Even with us. We just know how to put two and two together to find four.”</p>
<p>Piotr and Kitty shared a very confused look. “What are you talking about?”</p>
<p>Roberto rolled his eyes. “Since this is Illyana we’re talking about, let’s play a game to see if we can spell it out for you. Metal dude, how old are children in Russia when they start school?”</p>
<p>“Six,” Piotr answered, still confused about where this conversation was going.</p>
<p>“And how old was Illyana when she went missing?” Roberto asked in a very condescending tone. Piotr did not answer; he did not have to, the number hung in the air anyways. <em>Four</em>. Illyana had been four years old. “So, tell me, since you’re her all knowing big brother, when do you think she had the time to go to school?”</p>
<p>It was silent for a minute. All Piotr could muster was an “Oh.”</p>
<p>“Oh, indeed,” Dani remarked. “I suggest you get out of our room.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The next day, Illyana curled herself up in the school’s library. Classes were in session, so no students were wandering around, and she had found herself a secluded corner where she could remain undisturbed. It was just her and her art… and Lockheed.</p>
<p>Ever since the dragon missed her outburst the day before, Lockheed had been glued to her side. She kept assuring him that he did not need to feel bad, that she understood that he wanted to spend his time playing outside, but he was adamant on being a good emotional support dragon. So he was curled up on her side as she scribbled furiously on the paper.</p>
<p>This time, the art held no traces of red. Her thoughts were not on the torture that she faced, but on everything she missed out on. Her paper was screaming colors of blue, violet, and gray.</p>
<p>Only she knew that the vivid lines of gray and blue represented the snow that she remembered fondly from her childhood. Only she knew that the purple blocks and dots represented toys and fun. Only she knew that the blue swirls represented loneliness, isolation, and what could have been.</p>
<p>The drawing was an even bigger mess than her drawing the day before, but it screamed to her all the same. She lived in a world of grief; she grieved her childhood, her freedom, and who she could have been. She grieved a world where her parents never cast her out, where her brother never left her, where her life was never ripped to pieces while she could do nothing but suffer. She grieved her innocence, her ability to feel, her blissful ignorance to the horrors that swallowed the world whole.</p>
<p>She grieved Illyana Nikolievna Rasputin.</p>
<p>Because who she was now was far from her.</p>
<p>And because she missed being her more than anything.</p>
<p>She missed being able to feel. Her emotions had long since been buried under a frozen lake. A lake of her own creation to keep her from getting too attached or from getting her hopes up. Lately, the lake had begun to thaw, but like every time she let herself feel, it hurt too much and her icy exterior snapped back into place.</p>
<p>So, her emotions remained frozen and she remained drowning, beating desperately as she tried to break through the ice to reach the surface. Screaming as the current dragged her deeper and deeper into darkness. Writhing in agony; drowning in silence.</p>
<p>The ice was too thick to break. She had spent years building that barrier, and the cold was unforgiving. It was bitter and sucked the life out of everything; <em>she</em> sucked the life out of everything. Nothing ever truly mattered because the ice would keep everything away.</p>
<p>No matter how much she wished she could feel, that she could raise the temperature and swim through the lake of life, she was stuck in a trap of her own creation. Stuck in her own isolation with only herself, her art, and her dragon to lead her through the icy depths.</p>
<p>Her thoughts were broken when something landed on the table in front of her with a thud. In front of her was a new sketch pad along with a package of something that she had never seen before.</p>
<p>“They’re water colored pencils,” a voice behind her explained. She jumped and turned around to see her brother. He looked so nervous, as though he were afraid to get it all wrong again; Illyana knew that feeling better than anyone. “The lady at the store said that they were very high quality and that many people enjoyed them.”</p>
<p>“Why did you buy them?” Illyana asked. Her voice was not cold, only curious.</p>
<p>“I saw that you liked to draw,” he said. “I don’t know anything about art, but I thought that I would try to do something to make you happy.” He paused and took a deep breath. “I want to apologize.”</p>
<p>“What for?” Illyana asked. There was a lot he could apologize for.</p>
<p>“For holding onto the past too tightly. I think I had this image in my head that you were the same girl you were thirteen years ago. I kept convincing myself that if I could just get you to talk to me that we could go be normal siblings, like we used to be.” He paused and took a breath, the heaviness of the conversation obviously taking a toll on him. “But the past is the past, and you’re not the same person you used to be. So I’m sorry that I was expecting you to be someone else, and I’m hoping that I can get to know you for who you are now.”</p>
<p>Illyana was silent. She was definitely not expecting that.</p>
<p>“Okay,” she said, surprising even her.</p>
<p>“Okay?” He asked, his mouth wide open with shock.</p>
<p>She shrugged and looked him in the eye. “I’ll try,” she said as she opened the new sketch pad he had bought for her.</p>
<p>And for the first time in a long time, the ice melted enough for her to reach the surface.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0014"><h2>14. Chapter XIV: The Plot</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Illyana trains with Nightcrawler and bonds with Kitty.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hey! So, I finally made an outline and determined that this story will have thirty chapters.<br/>Also, I added Izzy Kane into the story (she will only be a minor character) because I feel that I have neglected Sam as a character. I know that she's not a mutant in the comics, but it's my story so she is one now. I will also be adding other members of the New Mutants in the comics in as background characters eventually.<br/>Enjoy the chapter!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Chapter XIV: The Plot</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“So there I was, minding my own business when this idiotic man walks up to me and declares that, mutant or not, there was no way that I was stronger than him because I was a ‘little girl’. So I challenged him to an arm wrestling competition, and I made him cry in less than a minute.”</p>
<p>All of the teenagers sitting around the breakfast table laughed at Izzy’s story. When Sam insisted that they should at least try to socialize with the other students, Illyana though that it was a horrible idea. People like Izzy only served to prove her wrong. The girl was absolutely delightful to be around, and Illyana had a strong suspicion that the reason Sam suggested that they hang out with other mutants was because of her.</p>
<p>Even now, with all of his friends around him, Sam’s full attention was on the brunette girl. He was obviously smitten with the girl, and Illyana had to stifle laughter every time he tried to act extremely chivalrous towards her.</p>
<p>“Men always seem to underestimate us,” Illyana added to the conversation, much to the surprise of everyone. “I once knew this guy who told me that I was not as strong as I pretended to be, so I dislocated his shoulder. A true idiot.”</p>
<p>“Hey!” Roberto protested. “That was me!”</p>
<p>“And you learned your lesson.”</p>
<p>The table erupted in laughter again. People chimed in with more stories of times they had to kick the crap out of people to prove that they were strong. This mostly ended up being humans who were stupid enough to mess with a young mutant. Illyana was about to add more anecdotes to the conversation when her brother entered the room and waved her over to him.</p>
<p>“Be right back,” she told her friends as she walked towards him. It was still kind of awkward between her and Piotr, but she <em>was</em> trying. She found that she actually enjoyed his presence, in a weird way. He was no longer treating her like a problem that needed to be fixed, and that had greatly improved their relationship. He was still acting like an overprotective big brother, but there was probably no way to get that to stop. Besides, it felt nice to have someone to look out for her… not that she would ever admit it.</p>
<p>“Hey,” Piotr smiled warmly at her when she reached him. “I was told to collect you for training.”</p>
<p>“Training?” Illyana asked. She doubted that there was anything that they could teach her; she had been training to use magic and to fight since she was a little girl.</p>
<p>“Yes, training. Also, tell Dani to come too. The Professor and Jean want to see her.”</p>
<p>Illyana decided it was best not to argue and walked over to the table. “Hey, Moonstar. Let’s go.” She then grabbed Dani’s arm and pulled the confused empath behind her.</p>
<p>“Illy, where are we going?” Dani asked as she struggled to keep up with the taller girl’s fast pace.</p>
<p>Illyana shrugged. “I don’t know. Ask the tall guy.”</p>
<p>Piotr seemed to be very amused by this exchange and being referred to as ‘the tall guy’. “You are both going to training,” he explained as he led them down the stairs. “The Professor and Jean are going to help you with your abilities to prevent any further issues.”</p>
<p>Dani blushed and Illyana grimaced. While Dani has not caused any dangerous illusions to take form, she had accidentally entered and worsened the nightmares of most of the people in the house. It was only a matter of time before the Professor stepped in.</p>
<p>Piotr stopped in front of a door and nodded for Dani to enter the room. Dani sent a nervous glance to Illyana who mouthed ‘good luck’. Illyana squeezed Dani’s arm in reassurance before letting go and allowing her friend to walk into the room.</p>
<p>Piotr led her through the hall to a large room. The room was made entirely of metal and seemed to have a lot of technology built into it. Inside the room was Kitty Pryde and another mutant that Illyana had never seen before. Illyana had to fight to keep herself calm upon looking at the mutant. He looked like a demon; his skin was blue, he had pointed ears, yellow eyes, and a tail.</p>
<p><em>‘He’s just a mutant, Illy,’ </em>She told herself. ‘<em>He won’t hurt you.</em>’</p>
<p>“Illy!” Kitty exclaimed enthusiastically as she rushed over to the younger girl. “This is Kurt, but you may know him as Nightcrawler. He’s a teleporter like you, so we thought that he could help you grow your powers.”</p>
<p>Illyana nodded at her. “So, what is this place?” She asked. “It seems a bit much to be used as a teleportation room.”</p>
<p>“This is the danger room,” Kitty explained. “We use this room to train against all types of scenarios, but we won’t be using its electronic features today.”</p>
<p>“I hear that you have a bit of trouble with teleporting multiple people,” Kurt added in a thick German accent. “Don’t worry! With a bit of practice and stamina training, you should find yourself being able to do it with no problem.”</p>
<p>The man was very enthusiastic, and Illyana found that all of her fears about the man went away quickly. He was far too kind to be an actual demon. Even a demon who was just pretending to be human could not be that kind. Piotr pulled Nightcrawler to the other side of the room to talk about how the training would proceed. Illyana noticed that Kitty’s eyes followed her brother lovingly.</p>
<p>“So,” Illyana began, “how long have you and my brother been together?”</p>
<p>Kitty was obviously shocked that Illyana initiated a conversation with her, but she seemed delighted. “Almost ten years,” Kitty said.</p>
<p>“Ten years?” Illyana asked shocked. “And he hasn’t… what is it that American’s say?... oh yes… put a ring on it?”</p>
<p>Kitty laughed in response to Illyana’s question. “We’ve talked about it,” she admitted, “but we’ve always been busy. Between being an X-Man and teaching classes, I guess we’ve just never found the time.”</p>
<p>“Do you want me to bully him a bit?” Illyana joked. “Make him finally make the time?”</p>
<p>Kitty laughed again but seemed shocked at the blonde girl’s offer. “You would really do that for me?”</p>
<p>“You seem to make him happy,” the blonde said with a shrug, “and there is nothing better than happiness.”</p>
<p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p>
<p>Two hours later, and Illyana was feeling exhausted. She was shocked at how far Nightcrawler had pushed her. She was expecting some simple teleportation, but he had made her teleport across the room for fifteen minutes straight as a warmup. Then he made her practice opening portals to Limbo and made her take Kitty with her as she teleported. By the time the training was over, she was completely ready to take a hot shower and a nap.</p>
<p>“Well done,” a voice said from the doorway. Illyana looked up to find the Professor lurking in the doorway. “You really are quite the extraordinary mutant, Miss Rasputin. You possess an extreme level of control over dimensional travel. However, I am curious about your other gifts as well.”</p>
<p>“What about them?” Illyana asked coldly. Despite doing her best to warm up to her brother and the other X-Men, Illyana was still unnerved by the Professor. Telepaths made her very uneasy; even though she could block them, she was always worried that her barriers would slip, and he would waltz right into her darkest memories.</p>
<p>“I’m just curious about how you channel all of that energy into so much power. What is its origin?”</p>
<p>“It’s magic.”</p>
<p>The Professor sighed, obviously not believing her. “Do you manipulate dimensional energy to create this ‘magic’?”</p>
<p>“No, it’s just magic.” Illyana was not going to tell him the entire backstory of how she got her magic. He was nosy enough without him knowing about her connection to the dark dimension and the pieces of her soul that were missing. Deciding that she was done with the conversation, Illyana used the last bit of her strength to teleport back to the bathroom and immediately hopped in the shower.</p>
<p>When she stepped back into the room that she shared with Dani and Rahne, she found the couple sitting on Dani’s bed, whispering and giggling. She ignored their gross flirting and walked over to her bed, determined to sleep for at least an hour.</p>
<p>“Hey, Illy!” Dani called when she passed them. “We’re having a movie night tonight; just the five of us. You in?”</p>
<p>Illyana just nodded because she was too tired to speak, and she fell asleep the second her head touched the pillow.</p>
<p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p>
<p>When Illyana reached the movie room, she was surprised that none of her friends were there except for Roberto. She was about fifteen minutes late, so she had no idea where they could be.</p>
<p>“Hey,” Illyana said as she approached him. “Where is everyone else?”</p>
<p>“I don’t know,” Roberto said with a shrug. “I just got here a minute ago and I was confused too.”</p>
<p>Illyana grinned wickedly. “That just means that we get first dibs on seats.” The two mutants immediately rushed over to the comfortable couch that Sam usually claimed as his. “I wonder if they’re getting snacks.”</p>
<p>“I don’t think so,” Roberto shook his head. “There’s already food on the table.”</p>
<p>Illyana looked, and he was correct. On the table was chips, popcorn, and a bottle of the one type of soda that Illyana enjoyed drinking.</p>
<p>“Huh, that’s weird,” Illyana said.</p>
<p>“What?”</p>
<p>“There’s only two cups.”</p>
<p>It was awkwardly silent for a moment while it slowly sunk into their heads that they’d been set up. “Well,” he said, “we may as well start the movie.”</p>
<p>Illyana just nodded as he reached for the remote and pressed play. She had no idea what the movie was about. Honestly, she did not pay attention to a single word that was said during the movie. Her focus was on how hot his leg felt when it was pressed against her own…</p>
<p>And how his arm had somehow found its way across her shoulders.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Awwwww how cute</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0015"><h2>15. Chapter XV: Life of the Party</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Illyana has a mental breakdown, the X-Men have to go on a mysterious mission, and it's Rahne's birthday... just a normal week at Xavier's School For Gifted Youngsters.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hi! This is longer than normal lol.<br/>This chapter has it all: mental breakdowns, Dani/Rahne relationship fluff, friendship, mystery, and birthday fun.</p>
<p>Possible trigger warnings: Severe depression, depictions of child abuse, PTSD, and murdering of small animals.<br/>If any of this is stuff that you can't read, I will leave the important details in the end notes. Also, most of this stuff except for the depression is just in the dream, so you can just skip past the beginning, and start reading where the italics stop.</p>
<p>I really hope yall enjoy!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>CHAPTER XV: Life of the Party</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>“Illyana, come here,” the loud voice of the demon lord boomed.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>The seven year old girl rushed towards the voice of her master, knowing that if she did not move with haste, she would face his wrath. She knelt on the rough cobblestone, not daring to meet the eyes of her abuser. She did not move, did not speak, did not even dare to breathe.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>The demon grabbed her by her pretty blonde hair and dragged her to her feet. She bit her lip to stop herself from whimpering… she knew that if she showed pain or fear, everything would become much worse.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>As he dragged her, her feet began to bleed from the rough ground in the dark dimension. Every part of this dimension seemed to be tailored to destroy her. The ground was made of black and dark blue stone. Sharp stalagmites rose from the ground, threatening to impale her if she tripped. The demonic animals watched from a distance, hoping for the chance to consume the blood of a human child. Even the sky, a nasty dark red void, seemed to laugh at her misery.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>This was her life: destruction and misery.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>Finally, he stopped dragging her and shoved her into a long slab of rock; the young girl recognized it as an altar. On the altar laid a small white rabbit that Belasco must have just stolen from Earth. He roughly thrust a knife in the young girl’s hand.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>“Today, my Illyana, we are going to try something new,” Belasco said with a malicious grin.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>The blonde had an ominous feeling as she glanced between the knife in her hands and the rabbit tied to the altar. “W-what do you want me to do.” Her voice tremored as she spoke, unable to hide the terrified pit forming in her stomach. She knew what he wanted; she just did not want to believe that even he could be this cruel.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>“It is time for you to learn about sacrificial magic. We shall begin with you killing the rabbit.”</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>“No!” The young girl shouted, forgetting momentarily what happened when she refused.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>The demon roughly gripped her arm and turned her to face him. “Do not disobey me!”</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>Illyana began sobbing, unable to stop her emotions from taking over at the horror of the situation. “Please don’t make me,” she pleaded desperately.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>“I have warned you before about begging,” he seethed as he shoved her roughly to the ground. The impact caused her to lose her grip on the knife. The demon lord picked up the knife and knelt over his student. “I will teach you to behave.”</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>He yanked up the thin dress that she was wearing and dug the knife into her back. Ignoring her screams of agony, he began to carve. He carved the same signal that he had so many times before. Marking her as his; showing her who she belonged to. He went slower than he usually did, giving her more time to feel the searing pain in her back. Giving her more time to submit to his authority.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>When he was finally done, he stood up and waited for Illyana to stand, but the young girl could not move. Blood was oozing from her back, and she knew that the scar was deeper than the others before it. She knew that there was no chance of the mark ever fading from her back; it was just another part of her that was permanently destroyed.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>After a few minutes, Belasco lost his patience with the girl and once again dragged her to her feet by her hair. Once she was facing him, Belasco began stroking her hair with one hand, and he used the other hand to wipe the tears off her face. No doubt, her hair and face were now as stained with blood as her back. He always did this after punishments; he stroked her as if he were trying to soothe her, and then he began the speech that he would give her hundreds of times.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>“You need to learn this magic Illyana,” he cooed at her. “One day, we will rule the world. Every dimension will bow at our feet, and you will rule by my side. You need to be ready. You have no time for remorse or fear. Feed your anger and turn it into a weapon.”</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>He turned her towards the altar and once again thrust the knife into her hand. “Now, kill the rabbit.”</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>The young girl lifted up the knife and made the mistake of looking the rabbit in the eye. Its dark eyes seemed to be filled with a fear and sorrow that resonated with her. She could feel her innocence leaving her body as she plunged the knife into its heart.</em>
</p>
<p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p>
<p>Illyana woke with a gasp as she abruptly sat up in her bed. It had been so long since she thought about that moment. The first time she took a life. The day she lost her innocence. The day that Belasco stole the first piece of her soul.</p>
<p>She could not stop herself from shaking and choked on a sob. She brought her knees up to her chest and began rocking herself back and forth.</p>
<p>
  <em>It was just a dream, a memory. He’s not really here. You’re safe now.</em>
</p>
<p>Despite knowing all of this, her fear could not subside. She could no longer choke back the sobs and began to have a complete meltdown. Tears streamed down her face as she tried to quiet herself.</p>
<p>As if sensing the fear rolling off of the blonde in waves, Dani quickly got out of her bed and rushed towards her. Dani sat on Illy’s bed and quickly wrapped her arms around her. “Illy, what’s wrong?”</p>
<p>Despite Dani’s attempts to soothe her, Illyana just began to sob louder. This time, Rahne woke up and rushed to sit on Illyana’s opposite side. Both girls tried to get the blonde to say what was wrong, but Illyana could not speak. Every time she tried, the terror rose up again, and she choked on her own sobs.</p>
<p>Somehow the girls ended up laying down; Illyana was squished between them as Dani and Rahne flanked her from either side. They held her close, silently telling her that they were there to protect her from the world. After an hour of sobbing, the blonde eventually fell back to sleep.</p>
<p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p>
<p>To say that Illyana felt horrible when she woke up was an understatement. Her head ached, her skin was probably blotchy, and her eyes burned from crying all night. Worst of all was the empty feeling in her chest. She could not speak; she couldn’t even move a muscle. She just laid on her bed in silence with nothing but a numbness in her heart.</p>
<p>From her position, Illyana could see Dani and Rahne already up and getting ready for the day. The girls had not even noticed that she had woken up yet, but she couldn’t bring herself to speak and tell them. So she just watched for a few minutes until Dani happened to glance at her.</p>
<p>“Hey,” Dani said softly as she approached the Russian girl. Illy didn’t respond; she couldn’t respond. Dani stroked her hair as if to soothe her, but Illyana just flinched, remembering the way that Belasco used to do the same thing.</p>
<p>Rahne cast her a worried glance and then turned to Dani. “Maybe we should miss classes today,” the Scottish girl suggested. Dani nodded in response, but Illyana knew that she had to convince them otherwise. She just needed to be alone for a while.</p>
<p>“No,” Illy croaked. She did not notice how sore her throat was until she tried to speak. “You should go to class. I’ll be alright here; I just need some sleep.”</p>
<p>Rahne and Dani obviously knew that Illyana was lying, but they knew their friend. They knew that she needed to be alone sometimes, so instead of arguing, they just listened. After ensuring the blonde that they would be back at lunch time, they left the room.</p>
<p>Illyana thought she would feel relieved that they were gone, but in reality, she just felt even more empty. She laid on her bed unable to move as her thoughts spun around in her head like a tornado. Her memories flashed and clashed in her head like a cacophonous war. She needed to draw; she needed to do something to process her emotions, but she could not move. She was paralyzed by her own experiences. She was a failure in her own body.</p>
<p>Her eyes stared at the drawer where her sketch pad and colored pencils were. She could hear them calling to her above the noise in her head. She tried to use magic to open the drawer and bring her stuff to her, but that just triggered memories of the man who forced her to learn magic; the man who forced her to become this <em>thing</em>. The man who was alive somewhere out there, waiting and plotting to ruin her once and for all. So instead of using magic, she just continued to lie in silence and despair.</p>
<p>Not even half an hour after Dani and Rahne left the room, Illyana heard the door open behind her. Sam walked into the room and sat on the edge of the blonde’s bed. “Hey,” he said softly in his country accent. “Do you need anything? Breakfast or a dragon?” It was then that Illyana noticed that Lockheed had followed Sam into the room, and the purple dragon curled himself into Illyana’s side. Despite feeling the comfort of her emotional support dragon, Illyana could not bring herself to answer Sam’s question.</p>
<p>Sam leaned back against her pillows and made himself comfortable before continuing. “I just want you to know that it’s alright. I understand; you’ve been through more than anyone your age should ever have to go through. It’s okay to relapse a little bit. You’re getting better and stronger every day.”</p>
<p>At Sam’s words Illyana burst into tears. Lockheed made a distressed noise and curled himself further into her side, while Sam immediately pulled her into a hug. “Hey, I got you. Just let it all out.”</p>
<p>And Illyana did. She sobbed and sobbed, although she knew that she shouldn’t. She needed to go back to the way she was. She needed to close off everything and let the cold overtake her again. She was foolish to begin opening up in the first place. Happiness and other emotions just make way for anger and anger makes way for darkness. She couldn’t let the darkness consume her. She had spent so long building a barrier between herself and the demon in her, but she let it all tumble down when she started caring.</p>
<p>‘<em>Feed your anger and turn it into a weapon.”</em></p>
<p>Belasco’s sick voice echoed in her ears.</p>
<p>She knew she should not continue like this. If she fed her emotions, she would end up feeding her anger. Anger was not only her best weapon, but also her biggest weakness. She would lose a part of herself if she continued down this road. She knew this, but as she sobbed into Sam’s shoulders, she realized that there was no going back to who she used to be.</p>
<p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p>
<p>A few days after Illyana’s first meltdown, Dani found herself rushing towards the library looking for the blonde. Illyana had been having extreme nightmares every night that week, but her meltdowns had been less and less severe every time. She seemed colder and more fragile than usual, but at least she was getting out of bed again.</p>
<p>When she reached the library, she saw that Illyana was sitting next to her brother. The two were hunched over a bunch of books, and Dani found herself grinning. Piotr Rasputin had taken it upon himself to try to tutor Illyana in the basics of every subject that she missed out on. From the looks of it, he was currently trying to teach her math, which was the blonde’s absolute least favorite subject.</p>
<p>Deciding not to interrupt, Dani began to browse through the bookshelves in the library as she waited for them to finish. She found a book called ‘<em>Intro to Telepathy</em>’ by Jean Grey, and she decided to read it and hopefully learn something. She picked a seat close to where Illyana and her brother were sitting. As she read the book, her focus was broken by Cyclops rushing into the library and walking up to Piotr.</p>
<p>“Emergency X-Men meeting, now!” The brunette man said quietly but sharply. There was an obvious edge of panic in his usually calm and collected voice. Piotr quickly apologized to his sister and followed the older man out of the room. Dani took this as her opening and slid into the seat across from Illyana.</p>
<p>“Were you spying on us?” The blonde asked in a teasing voice.</p>
<p>Dani just rolled her eyes. “More like waiting for an opportunity to speak to you… How are you feeling today?”</p>
<p>“О боже мой,” Illyana huffed. “More of this? When will it end?” Dani had to stop herself from grinning at Illyana’s annoyance. Since the day that Illyana had seemingly fallen apart at the seams, at least one member of their gang had been glued to her side at all times. Especially Roberto: he was following his ‘not-girlfriend’ around like a worried lovesick puppy.</p>
<p>“It will end when we no longer feel like you’re being self-destructive.”</p>
<p>Illyana was quiet for a moment. “I haven’t had dreams like this in a long time. I have a really bad feeling, and I can’t seem to shake it.”</p>
<p>Dani was quite visibly concerned. “Do you think something is about to happen?”</p>
<p>“I’m not psychic, Dani,” Illyana pointed out with a roll of her eyes. “The Professor and Jean say I have something called PTSD, whatever that’s supposed to mean. They think something ‘triggered’ me and that’s caused the sudden emergence of nightmares.”</p>
<p>Dani was shocked at this; things must be worse than she thought if Illyana was talking to the Professor about it. Illyana loathed the Professor, and she definitely hated therapists after the Dr. Reyes debacle. “What do you think triggered it?”</p>
<p>“My entire life is a trigger.”</p>
<p>Dani just sighed, knowing that Illyana was not going to elaborate any further. “I have something that may cheer you up. As you know, today is Rahne’s birthday, and I was wondering if you can do me a favor.”</p>
<p>Illyana scrunched up her nose in disgust. “Don’t tell me you want me out of the room tonight so you and your girlfriend can ‘have fun’.”</p>
<p>“No, well maybe, but no that’s not what I meant. I need your special skills.” Dani then began telling Illyana her plan for the night, and the part that Illyana needed to play in said plan.</p>
<p>“Oh yes,” Illyana grinned mischievously, “this is definitely something I can get behind.”</p>
<p>Their conversation appeared to end at the perfect time because Piotr Rasputin suddenly walked into the room. Even without her fear sensing powers, Dani could sense the anxiety running off of him in waves. Something had happened in that meeting.</p>
<p>“What’s wrong?” Illyana asked when her brother approached the girls.</p>
<p>“There’s an emergency,” he explained in a calm voice, but Dani could hear the anxiousness that he was trying to hide. “I have to leave with the other X-Men for a few hours. We’ll be back as soon as we can.” He looked at his sister for a moment as if he were trying to really get her to listen. “Please, no matter what, stay inside tonight. Do not leave for any reason.” Then he rushed out of the room before either girl could respond.</p>
<p>“That was so weird,” Dani said to Illy. “Something bad obviously happened. What do you think this was about?”</p>
<p>“Who cares,” Illyana said, the mischievous grin back on her face. “No X-Men! This just makes tonight even better.”</p>
<p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p>
<p>“Where are you taking me?” Rahne asked as her girlfriend led her through the halls. Dani had placed a blindfold over her, and even with her strong senses, the girl had absolutely no idea where they were walking to. Rahne was especially confused because Dani would not answer her questions; she just continued to pull her along.</p>
<p>Finally, Dani stopped for a second, and Rahne heard a door open before she was led into a room. Rahne felt her girlfriend peck her on the cheek before removing her blindfold. Rahne gasped as she saw all of her friends crowded in the movie room. Sam was wearing a tacky party hat, and Roberto was blowing on one of those party horns. All of the other friends she had met in classes were also there; they threw sparkly confetti at her as they all shouted happy birthday.</p>
<p>“I can’t believe all of you did this for me,” Rahne exclaimed, her eyes tearing up with joy. “Thank you so much!” Rahne then looked around at all of her friends and frowned. “Where is Illy?”</p>
<p>Dani just grinned at her girlfriend. “I sent her on a special mission.”</p>
<p>Just as Dani finished speaking, there was a flash of blue light, and Illyana Rasputin appeared in the middle of the room with five bottles of alcohol. “Who wants tequila bitches!”</p>
<p>Everyone cheered and began to take the bottles from the laughing blonde. Once her arms were free, Illyana rushed over to Rahne. “Happy birthday, doggie,” she said with a grin.</p>
<p>“Thank you, Illy,” Rahne laughed. “Where on Earth did you get tequila?”</p>
<p>“Dani sent me to raid Wolverine’s alcohol. No idea why he has so much tequila, but I’m definitely not complaining.”</p>
<p>Rahne just laughed, and Illyana was quickly pulled away by Roberto who handed the blonde a cup. Rahne settled onto the couch next to her girlfriend. “You know,” Rahne said as she looked at all of their friends talking and laughing, “we have some awesome people around us now.”</p>
<p>“We really do,” Dani agreed, “but you’re the best one.”</p>
<p>The two girls kissed causing a bunch of people to shout out “gross” and “get a room”. Rahne just laughed and turned to join the conversation. They spent several hours drinking, laughing, and just having the beset possibly time. When it began to get late, they decided to watch a movie; a musical film that Rahne had always wanted to see called <em>La La Land.</em></p>
<p>Halfway through the film, Rahne was nudged by her girlfriend. When Rahne sent her a questioning look, Dani pointed to Illyana and Roberto. The two were cuddled very close to one another, and Roberto had his arm curled around her shoulder. Next to them, Sam was in a very similar position with Izzy; the boy had finally taken his shot, and Izzy seemed happy to be the goal.</p>
<p>“We did it,” Rahne whispered. “We set up all of our friends. Now we can go on double dates.”</p>
<p>Dani laughed quietly. It had been their plan all along: get Illy and Berto together, then find someone for Sam. Their plan had fallen together perfectly. “You know,” Dani added after a moment of silence, “I was hoping that you and I could have a date of our own tonight.”</p>
<p>“Oh, really?”</p>
<p>“Yep. I already got Illyana to agree to sleep somewhere else tonight.”</p>
<p>Rahne giggled and put her head on her girlfriend’s shoulder. This was love. There was love all around her; her friends went out of their way to make her happy, she had a family she could count on, and her girlfriend filled her with joy and hope for the future.</p>
<p>For so long, Rahne thought her life was a sin. Between being a mutant and a lesbian, she thought for sure that she was evil. Dani is what proved her wrong. Dani filled her with so much joy and love that she realized that this could not possibly be a sin. God sent her love, and she would cherish this love with everything she had.</p>
<p>She would cherish Danielle Moonstar with everything she had.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Summary for people who listened to the trigger warnings:</p>
<p>Illyana had a horrible dream where she remembered some of the terrible stuff that Belasco did to her. She remembered the first time he made her take the life of a living creature (a rabbit), and destroyed her innocence. He used this to steal the first piece of her soul. Also, he revealed that he wants Illyana to rule the world by his side one day.</p>
<p>Illyana wakes up and has a total mental breakdown. She believes that her emotions are going to lead her down a dark path, and that she needs to shut them off again. Dani and Rahne comfort her. Later, Sam comforts her.</p>
<p>A few days later, it is Rahne's birthday. Dani goes to find Illyana. She sees that Piotr is tutoring Illy in stuff that she missed in school. Cyclops rushes in and says that there is an emergency. The X-Men have to leave on an emergency mission, and warn the kids to stay inside no matter what.</p>
<p>Illyana has been having these horrible dreams for several days. She admits to Dani that the Professor thinks that it is a trigger from her PTSD, but she seems to think that they're a warning of dark days to come.</p>
<p>Later, Dani surprises Rahne with a birthday party. Rahne is very happy, and loves her girlfriend. Dani and Rahne see Roberto/Illyana and Sam/Izzy cuddling. It is revealed that the girlfriends had plotted to set their friends up so that they could all go on double dates.</p>
<p>The chapter ends with Rahne being happy and knowing that her existence is not a sin.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0016"><h2>16. Chapter XVI: Demon</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>A big, fat, gigantic, train wreck of a mental breakdown.<br/>Just another day in the life of Illyana Rasputin</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Oof, sorry that it's been so long. I really don't have much of an excuse. Just procrastination paired with writers block and the start of the semester. Here's a long, messy chapter to hopefully make up for it!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>CHAPTER XVI: Demon</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>Nine year old Illyana Rasputin gripped the knife in her hands. The same knife that she had used to kill the rabbit all those years ago. Her knuckles were white and her fingers were hurting from how tight she was gripping the blade. She held the blade as if she were afraid she would lose her conviction if she applied any less pressure. She could not lose her conviction now.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>It needed to be done.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>Belasco needed to die.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>She had been practicing for months; during every rare moment when she was alone, she practiced using her teleportation. Belasco had used magic to limit her abilities the moment she was taken to this dimension, so she could not teleport herself back home. However, through practice and a lot of willpower, the young girl found that she could teleport freely around the landscape. There were limitations of course: usually she had to be able to see where she was going, and she could not teleport very far. Luckily, to follow through with her plan, she only needed to get through a door.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>Illyana crept through the halls, stopping often to listen for any sounds. Before turning corners, she would peek around to see if any of the Smiley Men were lurking about. There seemed to be none blocking her path, which was strange, but the girl had never snuck out of her room this late at night. As she walked through the halls, she walked on her tiptoes and focused on breathing quietly.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>She could not breathe.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>She could not make a single sound.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>Noise could alert them to her plans.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>When she finally reached the room belonging to the demon lord, she paused for a moment to regather her courage. She could do this. She could kill him; she had to. She approached the door that she knew was locked with powerful magic. The stone door looked cold to the touch, but Illyana was no fool. She could feel the heat radiating off of it, inviting her to touch it so that it could burn the skin from her hand. Instead of falling for the trick, she imagined the inside of his bedroom and forced herself to teleport inside.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>The room was pitch black, but she could feel his presence. Even asleep, he still radiated with enough power to make her want to curl into a ball and cry herself to sleep. She let her senses guide her to his bed and looked down at his sleeping form.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>Some people look innocent while they sleep. They look happy. They look peaceful.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>Not Belasco: there was never a moment of peace with him. His face still sported his permanent scowl, and he looked as though he were dreaming about skinning someone alive.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>As Illyana looked at him, her conviction only grew. He was disgusting: a monster. He needed to die.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>Illyana had never killed anyone before, but she knew that she would never regret killing him. Killing the rabbit had broken her to pieces but killing him would sew her back together. She would bathe in his blood. She would celebrate her freedom, even if she would be stuck in the dark dimension forever. Being stuck alone would be better than being stuck with him.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>Illyana raised the blade and positioned it above his throat. Not his heart, she may miss and give him a chance to live; not his head, she was not strong enough to break the bones; his throat, where she could easily cut and make him choke on his own blood.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>No she would not regret this at all.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>With one final look at her tormentor, Illyana Rasputin brought the blade down and stabbed through his throat. Belasco’s eyes flew open as he looked up at her with horror. Blood began to pour out of his mouth, and she delighted in the look of anguish on his face. She raised the knife again, and this time she stabbed it into his heart; then his throat again; then his stomach; then his ribcage; until she was stabbing over and over again choking on her own sobs.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>She wasn’t sobbing because she felt sad or even guilty. She was crying because she was horrified at who she had become. She was truly Belasco’s little demon girl, without a care in the world for taking a life. The sensation was equally as horrifying as it was thrilling, and soon the sobs turned into gleeful laughs. She had really done it; she was free of him. She would never suffer at his hand again.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>She looked upon his bloodied body and only laughed harder at the sight of him so helpless. Nothing could wipe this smile off of her face.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>Nothing except for the deep, dark, disturbing chuckle that joined her laugh.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>Illyana stopped laughing upon hearing the laugh, and, before her eyes, Belasco’s body disappeared. It was all an illusion.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>“Did you really think killing me would be that easy, Illyana?” Belasco asked from behind her. “I am very disappointed in you. I thought I taught you to be smarter than this.”</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>Illyana couldn’t move. Her feet were glued to the floor and her eyes to the now empty bed. Footsteps thudded behind her as Belasco’s presence drew closer to her. She felt his fingers softly stroke her hair, and he chuckled at her fear.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>“My darling Illyana,” he purred in her ear, “you really tried to kill me.” He laughed as if the thought of her killing him was the funniest thing in the world. “I should be really upset; I should punish you, but you played right into my hand.”</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>He gripped her shoulders and roughly turned her to face him. He gently gripped her chin and forced her to look into his soulless eyes. “You acted with so much malice and anger; you tried to take a life.” He stopped stroking her hair and instead grabbed it to drag her closer. “You destroyed your own innocence this time.”</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>No.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>It was her worst fear come true; if he had truly corrupted her, he could steal another piece of her soul.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>She quickly jerked herself from his grip as she backed up. He laughed even louder when she tripped and continued to scoot back from the ground. He simply walked forward, advancing slowly, knowing that she could not get away. He pulled the amulet from his robe-- the amulet that contained her first bloodstone—and began to chant.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>Illyana felt the burn began to rise in her chest; it was small at first, barely noticeable. The burn grew slowly until it felt like an inferno. Illyana screamed, begged, pleaded with Belasco to stop, but the demon only chanted louder. The burning was all consuming, it was unbearable. She couldn’t breathe or move to get up; she could only lay there as a piece of her soul was ripped away from her and turned into a bloodstone.</em>
</p>
<p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p>
<p>Illyana abruptly woke up from her nightmare for what felt like the hundredth time. It had become a pattern with her having horrible dreams based on memories and then waking up in a terrified daze. Also following the pattern was Dani who woke up immediately to comfort her.</p>
<p>“Hey,” Dani said in a soothing hushed voice as she wrapped her arms tightly around the blonde. “It’s okay. Just go back to sleep.”</p>
<p>“No,” Illy choked. “Something’s coming. Something’s wrong.”</p>
<p>“Shhh,” Dani whispered as she forced Illyana to lie down with her. “Nothing is wrong. It was all just a dream.”</p>
<p>“Something’s wrong, Dani. Something is very wrong.”</p>
<p><em>Something is wrong</em>, the blonde repeated this over and over again as Dani held her tightly. She repeated this until eventually she fell asleep.</p>
<p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p>
<p>The next day started exactly as every day that week had: with Illyana in a very bad mood. She was shaky and feeling paranoid; she could not shake the feeling that something horrible was about to happen. The lack of sleep did not help things. It was like every time she closed her eyes, she was assaulted by every horrible, repressed memory from her childhood.</p>
<p>Her friends did not help the situation at all. They were just trying to calm her down and telling her that nothing bad was going to happen. She knew they were probably right, knew that the dreams were probably just a result of her trauma, but every bone in her body was screaming that everything was about to fall apart. All of her senses were fully alert, and it was making it impossible to relax.</p>
<p>Worst of all was the Professor. Charles Xavier had been on her case about her mental health recently. Apparently, everyone was worried that she was about to have a full blown meltdown, so he needed to step in. He wanted her to do therapy multiple times a week and to take medicine to treat her PTSD. She obviously said no; Reyes was proof enough to her that therapy was bullshit.</p>
<p>The Professor didn’t stop trying though. Every time he saw Illyana, he tried to convince her to stop by his office. He would wait for her after her training sessions with Nightcrawler. He even talked to Piotr about getting her into therapy—apparently, since Illyana was ‘still a minor’ her brother was her legal guardian. Piotr had tried to convince his sister, but Illyana was adamantly against it. Eventually, she told the Professor that if he did not leave her alone, he may find his wheelchair in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean.</p>
<p>So, instead of dealing with her problems like a healthy seventeen year old, Illyana did what she always did: she took her problems out on other people. She lashed out on everyone who tried to help her, and she was back to making slightly-cruel sarcastic comments. Her friends were all very worried about her giant step backwards, but they were trying to be supportive. The support only served to annoy Illyana more: she didn’t want their support; she wanted their hate.</p>
<p>She sat at the breakfast table with everyone. Dani and Rahne were in deep conversation with a girl named Amara; Sam and Roberto seemed to be in a bacon-stealing-war with a bunch of other teenage boys at the table; Illyana was just sitting there silently. She had not spoken a word since she had woken up Dani at two in the morning. Speaking did not really appeal to her at the moment. As she picked at her eggs, she realized that eating did not appeal to her either. It was as if her very existence felt exhausting.</p>
<p>That’s why when her brother came into the room to collect her for training, she just shrugged. Training could not possibly make her feel worse, so why not. Her friends seemed to think that was a bad idea, though.</p>
<p>“Are you sure, Illy?” Berto asked softly as he placed a hand on her arm. “Maybe you should take the day off. Do something that relaxes you instead of stressing yourself out.”</p>
<p>Illyana was annoyed but understood Roberto’s hesitancy. Even though Illyana had not taken her pain out on him, she had been very cold and distant towards everyone. She knew he could see the explosion waiting to happen inside of her. She felt as if one wrong word may set her off.</p>
<p>“I find that training actually helps me out,” Piotr countered. “Whenever I get really angry, using my powers and punching things helps me to blow off some steam.” Despite her brother’s reassurance, Roberto still looked unconvinced.</p>
<p>“Berto,” Illyana broke her silence, “I’ll be fine.” Upon seeing her look of reassurance, Roberto nodded and reluctantly let go of her arm.</p>
<p>Illyana walked with her brother in awkward silence, though she was not the one to cause the awkwardness. Ever since Piotr and the rest of the X-Men left in a rush two days before, they had obviously been hiding something from the students. They were walking around in groups and talking in hushed voices. They were always geared up and ready for an attack at any moment. They were also banning students from going outside. Students who had to go outside—such as Rahne who needed to run and Roberto who needed to soak up the sun—could only go out for short periods of time with supervision. It was insane; the place had suddenly turned into a jailhouse with no explanation.</p>
<p>After another minute of walking in total silence, Illyana was fed up with not having answers. She teleported herself in front of her brother, causing him to jump in surprise and stop in his tracks. She crossed her arms over her chest and leaned casually against the wall. “So,” she began in a nonchalant voice, “what are you hiding from me?”</p>
<p>Piotr tried to copy her nonchalant look, but he failed miserably. While he was generally very good at having an emotionless countenance, he was awful at lying to his baby sister. She could see right through him, but he was still going to try. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”</p>
<p>“Seriously? That’s how you want to play this?”</p>
<p>“Yes, that is how I want to play this because I am not hiding anything,” Piotr defended. He brushed past her and continued to walk down the hall. “We need to go; we don’t want you to be late.”</p>
<p>Illyana rolled her eyes at her brother’s lie, and she teleported herself in front of him again. “I can do this all day, brother.” She was very confident in her ability to get the truth out of him until she saw the amused smirk on his face. Piotr grabbed his sister and swung her over his shoulders. “Oh my god! Put me down!” She shouted as she kicked her brother in the stomach. Piotr winced and turned to metal so her kicks would not hurt him.</p>
<p>He could not stop himself from chuckling as Illyana fought tooth and nail to separate herself without seriously harming him. She twisted herself around like a pretzel to try to make him let go, but that just ended with her being stuck upside down as he dragged her by her leg. “I hate you,” she finally huffed. Piotr just laughed even louder and dragged her into the danger room.</p>
<p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p>
<p>Illyana had to hand it to Nightcrawler; as much as she had doubted his abilities to teach her, she had learned a lot. Teleporting with multiple people was still a lot harder than teleporting alone, but Illyana no longer felt like she was going to pass out when she did it. All it took was more willpower and an extra burst of energy and she could take people with her to Limbo and then to anywhere else.</p>
<p>She and Kitty had a lot of fun testing this out. Much to the annoyance of her brother and Nightcrawler, Illyana took Kitty on a quick trip to California during training. They both ignored Piotr who was telling them to come back through their earpieces, and they went to pick up some milkshakes before returning thirty minutes later. Piotr and Kurt were very annoyed, but they felt better once they saw that Kitty had gotten them milkshakes as well.</p>
<p>After teleportation training, Kitty insisted that Illyana spar with her. Illyana was very hesitant because she didn’t want to hurt Kitty, but the older girl was adamant that they needed to train all of Illyana’s abilities, not just her teleportation.</p>
<p>“Besides,” Kitty said, “I’ve been in combat training for years. I can handle it.”</p>
<p>Still, as Kitty picked up an old broadsword and told Illyana to summon her soul sword, Illyana felt nervous. She knew that she would have to hold back because her sword could easily cut through Kitty’s sword and Kitty.</p>
<p>Kitty took the first swing, which Illyana easily deflected. It turned into some sort of synchronized fight dance: first Kitty would swing, then Illyana would either dodge or deflect the swing, then Illyana would swing, and the cycle would continue. Illyana was physically and mentally holding back during the spar. She focused most of her attention on making sure her movements were controlled and not too tough; she also focused on making sure that her sword was low on energy and would not accidentally kill Kitty.</p>
<p>Eventually, the sounds of the swords hitting one another is what drew the majority of the blonde’s attention. The cacophonous clang of the swords rang through her ears as her mind began to drift to dark places.</p>
<p>
  <em>“Strike back, my little Darkchylde,” Belasco hissed as he swung his sword at the eleven year old girl. “I need you to be stronger than this.”</em>
</p>
<p>She was panicked now as she dodged Kitty’s strikes. Her breathing was erratic. She could feel reality slipping away through her fingertips.</p>
<p>
  <em>“You insolent brat,” he hissed as he cut her across the stomach.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>Oh gosh, there was so much blood.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>Why was there always so much blood?</em>
</p>
<p>There was a scream, only it was not her own. There was so much blood, only it was not her own.</p>
<p>It was all Kitty’s.</p>
<p>Kitty Pryde laid on the floor as her the wound in her stomach bled through her shirt. Her sword laid next to her, snapped in half from the brute force of the soul sword. Said soul sword was still held tightly in Illyana’s grip, but it was dripping with dark red blood.</p>
<p>In a split second, Piotr was by his girlfriend’s side. He was desperately holding her hand and applying pressure to the wound. For just a moment, he let his eyes wander up to where his sister was standing with a horrified expression on her face. It was just a moment, but it was more than enough for Illyana to recognize the look in his eyes. The look of fear, anger, and disdain.</p>
<p>He now knew what everyone would learn about her sooner or later: Illyana Rasputin was a monster.</p>
<p>A demon.</p>
<p>Absolutely irredeemable.</p>
<p>“I-“ she began, but she couldn’t finish. “I-I didn’t mean…” She was cut off when Kitty began to speak.</p>
<p>“I was phasing,” the brunette said in a dazed voice. “How did you? I was phasing.”</p>
<p>“I didn’t mean to,” she finally choked out, but it came out as a whisper. “I didn’t mean to,” she repeated this phrase over and over again as she ran out of the room.</p>
<p>No one followed her.</p>
<p>She slammed the door when she finally reached her room. She wished she could go outside, but at least Dani and Rahne would not be out of class for a few more hours; she still had a few hours to break down in peace.</p>
<p>And break down she did.</p>
<p>She was an absolute mess. She always had to mess everything up. She would never be good enough. Once a demon, always a demon.</p>
<p>She was choking on her sobs; failing to breathe just like she had failed everything and everyone else in her life. She had let herself get drawn back into her past, and she hurt someone. Someone nice; someone she thought she may one day consider a friend. That was over now. Every time she found something good and stable, she had to mess it up for herself.</p>
<p>She threw the books and bedding around the room, ripping everything in sight. She ripped the ugly green curtains off the window and tore them to shreds. She just ripped as she sobbed. Eventually, the curtains at her feet lit on fire--a beautiful blue flame that danced before her eyes. She just laughed at the flame, knowing it was only a sign of how out of control she was.</p>
<p>Maybe the fire would burn her?</p>
<p>Maybe this would finally be the end of the bitchy demon girl who did not deserve to live.</p>
<p>Afterall, wasn’t she just a waste of air?</p>
<p>Unfortunately, the fire went out before it reached her feet. She once again laughed, but this time it was more of a disappointed laugh. Of course it went out. She didn’t seem to be able to die. She had been stabbed, beaten, shot at, and literally had pieces of her soul ripped from her, and yet she was still walking around ruining everything. The world wouldn’t let her go that easily. She still had so much left to suffer for.</p>
<p>She collapsed in the pile of burnt curtains and books. She let the residual heat from the fire hurt her skin, and she mused in the fact that it wasn’t hot enough to do any real damage to her. She wished it would; she wished it would burn her skin and make her as ugly on the outside as she was on the inside.</p>
<p>But she was pretty; that was the only good thing about her.</p>
<p>She was pretty.</p>
<p>Collapsed and depressed on the scorched floor is how Roberto found her an hour later. To her surprise, Roberto did not freak out at the mess. He only walked over and sat down next to her. He began to run his hand through her hair, but she flinched away, remembering that it was how Belasco used to soothe her.</p>
<p>“What are you doing here?” She asked after a few minutes of silence.</p>
<p>“It’s lunch time,” he spoke. “You weren’t there. I was looking for you.”</p>
<p>“Well you should just go,” she said coldly. It was better for her to push him away now. He would leave eventually when he found out what she was.</p>
<p>“No,” he said simply as he laid down next to her.</p>
<p>“Yes,” she snapped as she sat up abruptly. “You should just go now before we both get too hurt.”</p>
<p>“Illy, what are you talking about?”</p>
<p>“I’m not stupid, you know,” she said, half sobbing. “I may be wildly uneducated, and I may know nothing about social interactions, but I am not stupid.” She paused to take a breath because the crying was making it hard to talk. “I know what’s happening here, between us. I know where things are heading, and we need to end this now before I hurt you and you leave.”</p>
<p>“Hey,” he said in a panicked voice. “I’m not leaving.”</p>
<p>“Everybody leaves!” She shrieked. “Everybody leaves me eventually,” she said, this time much quieter.</p>
<p>“Not me. Never.”</p>
<p>Illyana let out a bitter laugh. “You don’t know a damn thing about me. If you knew who I was, you’d be running for the hills.”</p>
<p>“Illy-“</p>
<p>“Like the story of the men I killed. Do you know that I don’t even feel guilty for that? I killed eighteen men and I don’t feel an ounce of guilt.” Her voice was frantic now. She was no longer sobbing while she talked, but tears still streamed from her eyes. “I don’t even get to claim that it was an accident or self-defense like the rest of you. I killed them because I wanted to.”</p>
<p>Roberto was silent, allowing her to continue.</p>
<p>“They were his followers, you see. The followers of the demon who had me. And when I escaped him, I could have ran for the hills; I <em>should</em> have ran for the hills. But <em>no</em>, I went after them. I hunted down every last man who helped him, and I cut them apart piece by piece with my sword. That’s how Essex found me, by the way. Not because I was weak or confused, but because I was too wrapped up in my anger to notice the world around me.”</p>
<p>“Illyana,” he stopped her from ranting. “Baby, it’s not your fault.”</p>
<p>“It’s all my fault,” she snapped. “I mean, it’s not my fault that I can’t feel guilty considering that I don’t even have most of my soul. Have I ever mentioned that? I’m basically soulless. He ripped pieces of my soul from my body, and I could do nothing to stop him. I can’t even hate him for it, because I did the same thing to myself.”</p>
<p>“Illy, slow down and breathe.”</p>
<p>“No!” She screamed. “I ripped a piece of my own soul out. You know that sword I carry around? I created it by ripping a piece of my soul out of my body and shaping it into a sword. I barely have any of my soul left, and it’s my fault. I wanted revenge more than I wanted to be human. And you deserve someone who is human.”</p>
<p>“Illy-“</p>
<p>“And I failed too,” she said with a bitter laugh. “I failed at my big plan for revenge. I tried to kill Belasco, and I failed. He’s out there somewhere, probably laughing at my misery because I failed. I failed because he’s a demon lord, and he’s stronger than I’ll ever be. I was raised by actual demons, and that’s just what I became.” She stopped talking for a second, all of the frantic energy leaving her body as the reality hit her. “I’m exactly what they always wanted me to be. A demon. Their <em>Darkchylde.</em>”</p>
<p>“Hey,” Roberto finally got out over her frantic speaking. “You’re not a demon.”</p>
<p>“Yes, I am,” she sobbed, pulling her knees up to her chest.</p>
<p>“No, you’re Illyana. You’re the girl who pretends she hates everyone, but is the first one to volunteer to fight a demon bear to save her friends. You’re the girl who saves us when people are shooting at us. You’re the girl likes to drink strawberry milkshakes. You’re the girl who likes American comedies because they make life seem so simple. You’re the girl of my dreams.”</p>
<p>She let out another bitter laugh at the last statement. “So, the girl of your dreams is an absolute train wreck.”</p>
<p>Roberto used the arm around her shoulder to draw her in closer. “Look around Illy. We’re all train wrecks here. My parents sold me out to an evil corporation after I set my girlfriend on fire during sex, Sam blew up his dad and a bunch of other people, Dani killed her entire reservation, and Rahne killed her creepy, abusive priest. We’re all one big giant train wreck, but we crashed into one another. We can make it work because we’re all the same; we’re all damaged and doing our best to put the pieces back together.”</p>
<p>“The five of us against the world,” Illyana mused, thinking about a conversation they had had weeks ago.</p>
<p>“Exactly,” he said with a grin. “And as for you and me, you are everything I have ever wanted. You’re beautiful, but you’re so much more than that. You’re witty, you’re brilliant, you’re protective, you’re strong, and above all you are you. You are everything.” He stopped for a minute, to move to sit across from her. “When I met you, my entire life had been pulled out from under me. My parents, my money, and my girlfriend were all gone. I resorted to hitting on everyone and pretending that I was still the king of the world, but you saw through all of it from day one. You called me on my shit. You kept me on my toes. You were the only light within that dark time.”</p>
<p>“Roberto?”</p>
<p>“Yes?”</p>
<p>“Kiss me.”</p>
<p>And he did. It was like fireworks went off in her head. It was her first kiss that she had willingly had, and it was everything.</p>
<p>He was everything.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0017"><h2>17. Chapter XVII: Dark Days</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>People really should've taken Illyana's premonitions seriously.</p><p>TRIGGER WARNING: Implies the rape of a child; skip the dream sequence if you don't want to read it. I don't go into details, but just implying it can be bad for some people.<br/>The dream sequence stops when the italics stop.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Chapter XVII: Dark Days</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Thirteen-year-old Illyana Rasputin sat on the cobblestone floor with scrolls laid out in front of her. She was studying elemental spells. At such a young age, she was already well versed in fire magic, but her water and earth skills were subpar at best. And subpar would never be enough for Belasco; the demon lord demanded excellency from his protégée.</em>
</p><p><em>The bowl of water remained unchanged in front of her despite her best efforts. It was a simple freezing spell, so she should have </em> <em>been able to do this very easily. However, despite her own icy exterior, she had never been a natural at using her magic to freeze things.</em></p><p>
  <em>“Rigescunt indutae,” the young blonde hissed out. She felt the power surge up inside of her, but when she tried to push it out of her onto the water, the power vanished. She let out an indignant noise and kicked the bowl, causing water to spill all over the floor.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Now, now, Illyana,” a voice mocked from behind her. “There’s no need to throw a tantrum.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>The girl turned her head to see that Belasco had been watching her from within the shadows. With a wave of his hand, the bowl sat itself upright and the water returned to it. She shrank further into herself as his large red form approached her. He pulled her up by her hair and held her flush against his body; his right hand curled around her stomach, and his left stroked her pretty blonde hair.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“I think we need to increase the intensity of your training,” he muttered into her hair. She grew panicked at his words: the training she had was already exhausting. “At this point in your training, a simple freezing spell should be second nature to you. Don’t worry my darling Illyana, you will soon be caught up to speed. We will just have to get rid of the time you spend drawing or playing with that dragon of yours.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“No, please,” she whispered, trying not to cry. “Please don’t take Lockheed away.”</em>
</p><p><em>“You can have your silly pet back when I see some progress,” he hissed angrily. “You’re wasting time and energy on something that is so beneath you.” He jerked her head forward, so she was facing the bowl of water again. “Now, I want you to focus every bit of rage you have in your body, and direct it towards</em> <em>that bowl. Let it build inside of you and take over.”</em></p><p>
  <em>She knew better than to argue against him, so she focused on the things that angered her. She focused on his hands touching her body; she focused on the brands carved into her back; she focused on the pieces of her soul that were missing; she focused on the hollow, empty feeling that lived within her at all times. She focused it all into a pure, unadulterated rage.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Rigescunt indutae,” she hissed out again, but this time she could feel the difference. She could feel the anger and the power behind her words as frost crept through her body. She felt it expand out of her as the water in the bowl began to freeze. It wasn’t until the water was completely frozen that the rage passed.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>She steadied her breathing as a sense of overwhelming darkness overtook her. It was a sense that used to scare her to pieces, but now she loved it; she lived for it. The darkness had rooted itself deep within her long ago, and now she needed it like an addict needed nicotine. Dark magic had become her drug, her reason to live. She was so scared of how much she liked the feeling.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Well done, my Darkchylde,” Belasco praised as he began stroking her hair again. “If you continue to allow the darkness to flow through you, you will be unstoppable. Just think, in a decade or so, you may finally be strong enough to use your magic without saying spells out loud.” The darkness inside of her stirred at his words; she wanted that. She wanted to be so strong that nothing could touch her. She wanted power.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Her dark thoughts were interrupted when his right hand moved upward from her stomach. She stiffened as his hand squeezed; she had never been touched there before. “You really have developed quite wonderfully,” he said in a tone that she was too young to understand. “You will make a wonderful queen, sweet Illyana.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>She was frozen as his hands moved on her. She was frozen as she was pulled into a different room. She remained frozen that entire night, unable to fight back against a demon lord.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>That night, he took her innocence in the worst way possible. Another piece of her soul followed.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>It was the night she could never fully recover from.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</em>
</p><p>When Illyana woke up, she was more hysterical than she had been the past several nights. Why, out of all of her terrible, traumatizing memories, did she have to remember that one. She felt completely numb; her body didn’t feel like her own. She felt like a puppet to <em>his</em> desires, and she hated it. She felt like a stranger in her own body, and she couldn’t focus on anything other than the hollow feeling that had taken over her.</p><p>She didn’t even notice that Dani and Rahne had woken up with her. They were shaking her, calling her name, trying to get her to snap out of her nightmarish daze, but it was no use. Her head was stuck in the memory of the worst night of her life. She was drowning in her own sorrow, and there was nothing she could do.</p><p>But she knew someone who could do something.</p><p>She vanished in a flash of blue light, leaving Dani and Rahne confused and frightened.</p><p>She didn’t know how long she waited there; it was probably just a few hours, but in her current state of mind, it felt like an eternity. At one point, she unconsciously opened a portal and allowed Lockheed into the room. Lockheed’s warm and comforting presence helped to partially draw her out of her near-catatonic state. She was now aware enough of her surroundings to be able to stroke the dragon’s head as she stared off into space. She didn’t even have the energy to turn on the lights in the dark room.</p><p>Finally, when the sun began to rise and light began to peer in from the windows, Professor Xavier rolled into his office. He looked shocked to see her, but upon seeing the haunted look on her face, he kept his questions to himself and allowed her the chance to speak first. After several minutes of silence, she finally got her thoughts together enough to speak.</p><p>“I can’t believe I’m here,” she confessed. “I promised myself that after Reyes, I would never get myself into this type of situation again.” She stopped herself from rambling and took a deep breath. “I need your help. I can’t live like this.”</p><p>
  <em>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</em>
</p><p>Professor Xavier cleared two hours of his schedule for her that morning. She didn’t speak much; she <em>couldn’t</em> speak about most of it, but she tried her best. She even let her mental barriers down, so he could venture into her thoughts and see where she was mentally. She was willing to do anything to get to a more stable place.</p><p>As she left his office, they agreed to meet at the same time for the rest of the week and see where it went from there. She still felt uneasy but talking about some of her past took a big weight off of her chest. She was no longer suffocating herself by keeping everything inside; she could breathe… kind of…</p><p>Deep in her thoughts, she was not aware of her surroundings until she walked into a hard object. Upon looking up, she discovered that the object was her six-foot-something, giant of a brother.</p><p>
  <em>Oh, fu—</em>
</p><p>“Hey,” he started awkwardly, clearly remembering what she did to Kitty yesterday. “I was looking for you. Dani and Rahne said you disappeared in the middle of the night.”</p><p>“Oh, yeah,” she mumbled, just now realizing that she had probably woken the pair up. “I just needed to get out of there.”</p><p>He cleared his throat awkwardly. “It looks like you just came from the Professor’s office. That’s good.” Illyana just nodded, and awkward silence took over them for a minute. She wanted to ask about Kitty, but the question was stuck in her throat. “Don’t worry, we fixed the window.”</p><p>That got her attention. “What happened to the window?”</p><p>“You don’t know?” Her brother asked in a very concerned tone. “Rahne said it shattered when you woke up. The glass was frozen solid.” She shrunk under his concerned gaze. It made sense; she had been dreaming about the time she mastered the freezing spell after all.</p><p>“I didn’t even realize,” she muttered, her voice barely audible. “I seem to be losing control a lot lately.” Her last statement hung in the air; they both knew what she was referring to. “Is Kitty-“</p><p>“She will be fine,” he interrupted her, much to her relief. “The cut was very shallow. She will just have to take it easy for a couple of days, and then she should be back on her feet.”</p><p>“That’s good,” Illyana said, her voice clearly reflecting her relief. “Can you tell her I’m sorry?”</p><p>“Yes, but you can also tell her yourself. She’s not mad at you.”</p><p>“She’s not?”</p><p>“No, you didn’t want to spar, and we convinced you. We should have taken your hesitance to mean that you were not ready,” he assured her. Illyana felt like crying; he didn’t hate her. Her brother didn’t think she was a monster. “I’m sorry too.”</p><p>That definitely took her by surprise. “What are you possibly sorry for?”</p><p>“I’m sorry for the way I reacted when Kitty got hurt,” he explained. “I was being a bad brother.”</p><p>“You were just helping your girlfriend. I understand,” Illyana reassured, although it definitely had hurt when he looked at her like she was a demon.</p><p>He just shook his head at her. “I should have been both a good boyfriend and a good brother; the two things should not be mutually exclusive. So I’m sorry.”</p><p>After a moment, Illyana nodded. “Okay, I forgive you then.” They were silent again for a moment, but this time the silence was not tense. “We have a lot to figure out, you and me.”</p><p>He sighed. “Yes, we’re not quite the super-siblings I pictured us to be.”</p><p>“We’re working at our own pace.”</p><p>“Yes, we are,” he said with a smile. “Do you know how to play air hockey?”</p><p>“Huh?” She asked, taken aback by the sudden change in conversation.</p><p>“Air hockey,” he explained. “You hit the little puck with the handles. I’m quite good at it.”</p><p>“Okay?”</p><p>“I’m going to teach you how to play air hockey.”</p><p>Illyana just laughed at the determined look on her brother’s face.</p><p>
  <em>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</em>
</p><p>The next two weeks showed huge improvements in Illyana’s well-being. She still had nightmares every night, but they were now bearable. She wasn’t sure if this sudden change was because of the therapy or because everything seemed calm in comparison to her worst memory. Whatever it was, she definitely was not complaining.</p><p>She went through a lot of changes over this time period. For one, Dani taught her how to braid her hair, so now she braided it at night so her hair would be wavy in the morning. She was also being more open towards being friendly with people outside of her immediate circle. Izzy, Amara, and a boy named Doug had become regular additions to their group hangouts.</p><p>The biggest change was between her and Roberto. Even she had to admit that she was acting like a lovesick puppy. They were practically glued to one another whenever he wasn’t in class. He made her laugh a lot, and she made him literally start smoking whenever he got too <em>hot</em>. They were also constantly making out. It was a cause of annoyance for most of their friends, but they could not complain too much since Dani and Rahne were obnoxious and Sam and Izzy were finally dating too.</p><p>Apparently, they were just acting like regular teenagers, but this fact did not make Piotr any less horrified when he walked in on Illy and Berto making out. Poor Roberto couldn’t run away fast enough as the metal giant chased him through the mansion.</p><p>Given all these changes in her life, Illyana woke up feeling almost happy most days. She spent most days getting all of her frustration out with her morning therapy sessions, then happily talking to her friends, then happily playing with Lockheed.</p><p>But this was most days, and today was not.</p><p>Today, she woke up feeling uneasy. Every bone in her body was screaming at her to run, to teleport herself far away. She felt shaky and a chill had swept over her entire body.</p><p>Something was wrong.</p><p>She sat up in her bed and saw that only Dani was in the room. Rahne must have already left for breakfast.</p><p>“Dani,” the blonde said nervously, waiting for her friend to turn her attention towards her. “Something’s wrong.”</p><p>Dani was obviously concerned by Illyana’s statement. Illy hadn’t woken up declaring that something was wrong in several days. “Hey,” she said in a reassuring voice, “it’s okay. Maybe you should go talk to the Professor.”</p><p>“This is not my nightmares talking,” Illyana snapped angrily. She walked over to her dresser and started getting dressed. “Whatever I’ve been sensing these past few weeks has become stronger. Something <em>is</em> wrong, and it will go wrong today.”</p><p>“Illy,” Dani said softly, “I don’t want to make you feel like you’re being paranoid, but you said it yourself. You are not psychic; you don’t know what will happen in the future.”</p><p>“I know,” Illy said, as she frustratedly pulled on her light blue shirt. “I know I’m not psychic, but I also know that something bad is going to happen.”</p><p>Dani sighed. “Okay, but you still need to tell the Professor. Either he will reassure you that nothing is wrong, or he’ll prepare for whatever it is that you are sensing. Let’s just get dressed for breakfast now.”</p><p>Illyana was frustrated that Dani didn’t believe her, but she still reluctantly got dressed. She pulled her hair out of her braids and ran her fingers through the waves. She then put on some eyeliner and mascara, and she was ready to go. Even though she felt like a mess on the inside, at least she looked put together on the outside.</p><p>Just as the two girls were about to leave the room, there was a knock on their door. Illy pulled the door open to find Roberto leaning against the wall.</p><p>“Hi,” he smiled at her.</p><p>“Hi,” she smiled back. Most of her anxiety faded into the background as she looked at him. Roberto made her feel safe.</p><p>“Gross,” Dani gagged.</p><p>“Really, Moonstar?” Illyana sassed. “I share a room with you and your girlfriend. I know what you two get up to when you think I’m asleep. You don’t get to ‘gross’ me and Berto.”</p><p>“What do they get up to when they think you’re asleep?” Roberto asked with a smirk.</p><p>“Gross,” both girls said to him.</p><p>Roberto just laughed at them. “So, why are you two running behind today?”</p><p>Illyana stilled as she remembered the feeling she had woken up with this morning. “Berto, something is wrong.”</p><p>His smile instantly went away, and Dani tensed up beside him. “Illy,” he said calmly like he was talking to a scared puppy, “nothing is wrong. We’re all okay. I promise y-“</p><p>As if the universe was waiting for its cue, suddenly there was a loud crashing sound, and the lights began to flicker. Illyana could hear screams from down the hallways, as more crashes and loud bangs echoed throughout the house.</p><p>She should have been freaked out, but instead, she calmly turned to her boyfriend and friend. “You were saying?” She mocked.</p><p>“Oh shit,” he and Dani cursed.</p><p>Thrown from their moment by another round of banging noises, the three immediately began to run towards the sound. Nearly tripping down the stairs because they were running so fast, they had to immediately duck as a fireball was thrown over their heads.</p><p>The first floor of the mansion was in chaos. Students and teachers were running around fighting off the intruders. There were so many of them; all mutants, all dressed in black, and all wearing a familiar symbol on their chests.</p><p>“Essex,” Dani whispered, voicing Illyana’s thoughts.</p><p>“Just when I thought we were finally normal teenagers,” Roberto sighed. “Now we’re going to have to go full Power Rangers on them.”</p><p>Illyana was about to ask what the heck Power Rangers were when a knife embedded itself into the wall an inch from her face. Essex had spotted its favorite mutant delinquents. The three mutants spared one last look at one another before jumping into the battle.</p><p>Sword in hand, Illyana appeared throughout the room where she was needed—mostly to help the younger students who were completely overpowered by the Essex mutants. It was bloody, but she tried not to think about what she was doing. It was easier if she thought of them as faceless monsters and not lives that she was taking.</p><p>Out of the corner of her eye, she saw a man advancing on a young girl. Before she could think twice, she had teleported herself in between them. The man grinned wickedly at her and raised his hands; once again the lights began to flicker, and electricity crackled on his fingertips. Illyana swung her sword at him, but he zipped out of reach of the blade. The electricity appeared to give him enhanced speed along with other abilities. Every time she tried to get a hit in, he suddenly was in a different spot. She kept trying, and she was getting annoyed and sloppy.</p><p>And that’s when he got the upper hand.</p><p>When she delivered another failed swing, he used his powers to zap the hand that was holding the sword. As electricity shot up her arm, Illyana was forced to drop her soul sword on the ground. The man zipped towards her and violently wrapped his hands around her throat. He threw her down on the coffee table and squeezed tighter, trying to force her to pass out.</p><p>Illyana’s mind flashed once again to the worst night of her life. How Belasco had wrapped his hands tightly around her neck; either as a way to keep her quiet or as some sick power play, she would never know. All she knew was that Post Traumatic Stress Disorder was a bitch, and she was going to break this asshole like a twig.</p><p>She felt the power surge through her body and focused the energy into her hands. There were no visible changes, but she could feel it; she could feel how strong she was. With one hand, she grabbed onto one of the hands around her neck and twisted it. The man screamed in pain as his wrist broke, but she kept applying pressure, effectively crushing every bone in his hand. He rapidly jerked his hand away, and she allowed him. The second his hand was off her neck, she quickly brought her head up and slammed it into his.</p><p>Stars danced in her vision, and she felt blood run down her head—she didn’t know if it was hers or his. She just laughed at the pain knowing his was worse. The man groaned in agony and slumped on top of her. She used this to her advantage and flipped him over, so she was on top of him, straddling him. She smiled down at him as he looked up at her in horror. She took her left hand and wrapped it around his neck, the same as he had done to her. However, with her extra strength, all it took was a little bit of pressure and his neck broke. Feeling satisfied in having fulfilled her traumatized desires, Illyana got off the man and picked her sword up off the ground.</p><p>“It’s a shame he had to die,” a woman’s voice said from behind her. “He was quite powerful. One of Master’s favorites.”</p><p>Illyana knew that voice. She turned around and saw her favorite telepathic, telekinetic bitch. “Look who showed her face for round two,” Illyana said in mock delight. “I hear they call you Psylocke.”</p><p>“And I hear you’re Magik.”</p><p>“The names really are quite ridiculous. It’s like we’re characters in some semi-successful superhero movie.”</p><p>Psylocke was not amused. Pink light erupted from her hand, forming her energy sword. The two locked eyes for a moment—dark brown on ethereal blue—before leaping into battle. Illyana used all of the tricks she had used in the previous battles: she teleported in random patterns to throw off her opponent, she cast a spell to make herself impervious to telekinesis, and she swung with the intent to kill. Unfortunately, Psylocke had picked up some new tricks.</p><p>The older mutant had obviously been practicing for her second go at Illyana Rasputin, and the practice paid off. Her swings were more vicious and precise. She seemed ready to strike again at Illyana every time the latter teleported away. She had even managed to cut Illyana multiple times, drawing blood from the wounds on her arms and left leg.</p><p>However, Illyana wasn’t going down without a fight. Every injury she sustained just made her angrier, and anger was power. As her more demonic side became prevalent, she became faster, stronger… deadlier. Anger was no longer bubbling under the surface; it had consumed her full force. She saw red as she struck Psylocke over and over again until she knocked the older mutant onto the ground. She smiled as she raised her sword, ready to get rid of her enemy once and for all.</p><p>“They’re red,” Psylocke said suddenly. Illyana froze, confused. Psylocke’s eyes didn’t hold fear; they held a cruel fascination. “Your eyes are red.”</p><p>Illyana stumbled back. A sense of overwhelming dread took over her as she looked down at her hands in horror: they were stained in blood. She had done it; the one thing she had sworn to herself she would never do… she had lost control of her demonic side.</p><p>She stopped and blinked several times, forcing herself to come back to reality. Finally, she no longer saw red in her vision and her eyes went back to normal. She was still shaken, but at least she was still <em>her</em>. Unfortunately, Psylocke took advantage of Illyana’s moment of weakness, and Illyana was thrown to the ground when a hard object hit her in the back of the head.</p><p>“You may be immune to telekinesis Miss Rasputin,” Psylocke mocked as she walked towards her, “but you’re not immune to a good blow to the back of the head.” Psylocke lifted her hands and the object that had hit Illyana floated above her. It was a lamp, coated in a dark red ooze that must have been Illyana’s blood. Psylocke position the lamp so it was above Illyana’s head and smiled at the blonde girl.</p><p>So, this was it.</p><p>After all of this time.</p><p>After all the times she had been stabbed, shot, or threatened by demon bears.</p><p>This is what would kill her.</p><p>Death by lamp.</p><p>How embarrassing.</p><p>Illyana closed her eyes and waited for the thud that would end her life. She was shocked, however, when she heard the thud but felt no pain. In fact, she wasn’t even touched.</p><p>“Get away from my sister, you crazy bitch,” a man’s voice said. Illyana opened her eyes to see Piotr Rasputin in his full metal form standing over Psylocke. Illyana didn’t know what she was more shocked about: that Piotr saved her in the nick of time, or that he actually called someone a bitch. She was pretty sure Kitty owe her fifteen bucks.</p><p>As Piotr and Psylocke began to fight, it was clear that her brother was outmatched. While he was super big and strong, Psylocke was telekinetic. She easily blocked his punches without even touching him. Illyana tried to force herself to sit up, but her vision was getting blurry from the blood loss. Black spots danced in her vision as she was forced to watch the fight.</p><p>A cold, bitter feeling overtook her as she watched Psylocke get the advantage in the fight. Of course, right when they found each other, right when they were finally acting like siblings, he was going to leave her again. She couldn’t get left again. She would rather die a thousand deaths than watch anyone she loved ever get hurt again.</p><p>She didn’t know how she found the strength to get up. She didn’t even remember picking up her sword or dragging herself to where Psylocke stood with her back turned towards her, pink sword ready to impale her brother. She didn’t even get to see her shocked expression when she was impaled instead. All Illyana remembered was the feeling of darkness that overtook her; the feeling she needed, like an addict to nicotine. She remembered looking down at Psylocke’s dead body and feeling relieved, happy even.</p><p>“You didn’t have to kill her,” Piotr’s voice brought her back to reality. “There’s always another way.”</p><p>Illyana looked her brother in the eyes and shrugged. “Not in my world, there isn’t.”</p><p>The battle ended soon after that, with the Essex mutants retreating. The mansion was a complete wreck, but Kitty assured her that the mansion gets destroyed on a yearly basis. Even though her head was spinning and her vision was going in and out, she saw Dani and Roberto alive and walking around after the battle. However, no matter how hard she looked, she didn’t see Sam or Rahne anywhere. She didn’t see them in the battle, or in the hallways, or in the med bay when her brother finally dragged her down there.</p><p>She wanted to ask, but she had this feeling that she wouldn’t like the answer. The question burned in her throat, but she couldn’t bring herself to ask yet. Not until Jean Grey cleaned the wounds on her head and helped her stitch up her wounds. Not until Dani and Roberto walked into the med bay to check on her. Not until she saw the distraught looks on their faces.</p><p>“Where are they?” She finally voiced. “Where are Sam and Rahne?”</p><p>Everyone immediately went silent. No one spoke until Dani suddenly broke into tears and ran out of the room, and Roberto sank to the floor and pulled his knees up to his chest. That’s when Illyana broke the silence again.</p><p>“Piotr,” she turned to her brother, “Where. Are. They?”</p><p>Her brother gulped and avoided her gaze. “We don’t know.”</p><p>“What do you mean you don’t know?”</p><p>The tension in the air was so thick, she could have cut it with her soul sword. “Essex took them.”</p><p>It was silent for a moment before Illyana went ballistic. “What do you mean Essex took them? We have to find them.” She tried to get out of the hospital bed, but the X-Man that she recognized as Cyclops held her down.</p><p>“Illyana,” Jean interrupted, “you are badly injured. You need to rest.”</p><p>“What I need is for you to get off of me,” Illyana snapped, her voice sounding demonic. All around her magic flowed through the air as her anger got the better of her. The lights began to flicker, the medical equipment began to malfunction, and the air grew ice cold. The cold from the air spread its way into her very soul as Illyana came to a terrible realization. Illyana turned her head towards her brother once more. “This is what you’ve been hiding, isn’t it? You knew they were coming for us, and you didn’t say anything.”</p><p>“Illy-“</p><p>“Did you not think,” she hissed through her teeth. “Did you not think for one moment, that the people that Essex was after needed to be warned.”</p><p>“We thought we had it handled,” Cyclops interrupted. “We didn’t want to worry all of you. You’re just kids.”</p><p>“I’ve never had the luxury of being a kid,” Illyana snapped. A wave of power escaped her, knocking Cyclops away from her into the wall. “You kept a secret, and now my friends are missing.”</p><p>“Illyana,” Jean said, approaching her like you would a scared dog, “you need to stay calm. Losing control of your powers may only worsen your injuries.”</p><p>For once, Illyana didn’t care about losing control. She felt the room shake as her powers ran through her like a bullet. She felt the cold air suddenly turn burning hot. She felt it all, and she welcomed the loss of control. She noticed that Roberto’s gaze was on her; it was curious, but not judging. She also noticed that his hands were smoking; he wasn’t in control either.</p><p>“Illy,” her brother tried to soothe her, “please calm down.”</p><p>But she didn’t.</p><p>Sparks flew from the lights as they lost power in the room. The temperature somehow grew hotter; hot enough to burn her skin. She didn’t care about any of it. At least she could feel something.</p><p>And she felt something else too.</p><p>She felt the familiar prick of a needle in her neck as darkness began to swarm her vision.</p><p>She turned her gaze to where Jean was standing, sedative in hand. Instead of glaring at her, as the X-Men expected, Illyana smiled at her—a cold, wicked smile.</p><p>“When I wake up, I’m going to kill all of you.”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0018"><h2>18. Chapter XVIII: Something Sinister</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Dani loses control, and Sam and Rahne discover the secret behind Essex Corp...</p>
<p>....pay no attention to the title..........</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Sorry, it's been a while. In my defense, it's snowing here and we totally lost power and water for a while.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Chapter XVIII: Something Sinister</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“What did you just do?” Roberto seethed as he rushed over to his girlfriend.</p>
<p>Piotr couldn’t answer the question. He couldn’t do anything except stare at his sister, who was passed out on the hospital bed. She looked so pale. The blood loss had obviously taken its toll on her, and the drugs stopped her from moving. If it weren’t for her breath moving her chest up and down, Piotr could almost think she was dead.</p>
<p>It was the appearance of death that kept him frozen. So he just stood there, staring at his knocked-out sister as chaos incited around him. Roberto was livid; there was no stopping it as anger took over him, and he shifted into his full solar form. Eventually, Dani came back into the room and joined Roberto in yelling at the X-Men. They were calling them every dirty name in the book. They even compared them to Reyes.</p>
<p>It all passed over Piotr’s head, though. The only thoughts in his mind were thoughts that had been repeating in his head like a broken record for thirteen years.</p>
<p>He’d failed his little sister.</p>
<p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p>
<p>Fortunately for everyone, Illyana did not keep her word and kill the X-Men when she woke up. She simply woke up from her drug-induced sleep, took one look at her desperate brother sitting next to her, and teleported out of the room.</p>
<p>She wanted to kill them, though. She was mad; her chest burned with rage at the thought of what they had done to her and her friends. She wanted to slowly break every bone in their bodies and watch the light drain out of their eyes. These violent thoughts scared her enough to realize that it was a bad idea. Her desire for vengeance was just a way for the darkness to creep back in and take full control of her.</p>
<p>She couldn’t lose control.</p>
<p>She wouldn’t.</p>
<p>So she went back to her ways from several months ago: she avoided the X-Men at all costs. Dani and Roberto happily joined her in the avoidance, but Dani checked in with them multiple times a day to see if the X-Men had any success in tracking down Sam or Rahne.</p>
<p>A lot changed during the next week. Firstly, Roberto moved into Dani and Illyana’s room because the three of them refused to be separated. The X-Men also watched all three of them like hawks, waiting for one of them to explode. Worst of all, the mansion was now under a strict lockdown. Students weren’t allowed to leave the house for any reason, and they now had a curfew. This had quickly turned from a school into a prison; they may as well have never left Essex in the first place.</p>
<p>Of course, whenever one of the New Mutants pointed this out, the X-Men just assured them that they’re keeping everyone safe...</p>
<p>Because that was so successful last time.</p>
<p>Flashbacks of that day haunted Illyana. It had only been a week since they lost Sam and Rahne, but it simultaneously felt like it had been years and seconds. Nothing made sense. Illyana just dragged herself around feeling like a stranger in her own body. She felt empty and lost without all of her friends.</p>
<p>This empty feeling was probably worsened by her sudden halt in therapy. She had been making so many strides towards getting better, but that all stopped the moment she realized that Professor Xavier had been lying to her all along. She hated that she fell for it. She hated them. Illyana was completely overwhelmed by feelings of anger and sorrow. Her emotions were a rollercoaster that she had no control over. Every time she became remotely steady, she would get sad or angry all over again.</p>
<p>The anger was the worst. The strongest.</p>
<p>Betrayal washed over her in waves, drowning her in a sea of rage. She noticed that she had become meaner, that her thoughts had become more vicious and bloodthirsty. Ever since her eyes turned red during her fight with Psylocke, her demon side seemed to be fighting to take over her consciousness.</p>
<p>That’s why she was standing in front of the mirror in the locked bathroom. She was staring at herself in the mirror--or, more accurately, staring at her eyes. She only allowed the emotions to take over her when she was alone so that no one would see. She let herself feel the anger for a split second, and her eyes began to flicker.</p>
<p>Red.</p>
<p>Brown.</p>
<p>Red.</p>
<p>Brown.</p>
<p>Red.</p>
<p>Brown.</p>
<p>Over and over again.</p>
<p>As much as she tried to fight it, she could not control the effect her emotions were having on her. She was quickly losing a battle for her soul. It was easy to fight people, mutants, or even demons, but it was nearly impossible to fight herself. She was just so tired. She had been fighting all her life, and she just wanted it to stop. Maybe the fact that she was losing was a sign that she should give up. So she just stood there, in front of the mirror, trying not to cry as her eyes flickered red.</p>
<p>Her dark thoughts were interrupted by a knock on the door.</p>
<p>“Hey,” Roberto said softly when she opened the door. “Sorry to rush you, but I need to hop in the shower.”</p>
<p>“Okay,” Illyana muttered, her eyes now back to brown. She tried to walk by him, but he grabbed her arm.</p>
<p>“Are you okay?”</p>
<p>“Would you believe me if I said yes?”</p>
<p>“No,” he responded with a sad smile, “but I won’t push you anyways.”</p>
<p>Illyana gave an attempted smile and kissed him on the cheek. “Goodnight.” She walked back into the bedroom, hearing the shower begin to run. Dani was curled up on her bed, looking as uneasy as Illyana felt. The younger girl looked pale and panicked, like she didn’t know what was real. “Hey, Moonstar. You look like you’re feeling fantastic.”</p>
<p>“My head feels messy right now,” Dani rushed out, her voice sounding panicked and anxious. “I can feel everyone’s fear, and my own fear is just making it worse.”</p>
<p>Illyana instantly teleported to stand right in front of her friend. “You’re okay. You just need to breathe and focus on something else.”</p>
<p>“I can’t,” Dani snapped. “What is there for me to focus on? My girlfriend possibly being dead? Sam being gone too? Everything is a nightmare right now.”</p>
<p>Illyana forced her own fear down and made her voice as reassuring as possible. “I know it feels like that, but if you just calm down, everything will be alright eventually.”</p>
<p>Dani snorted at Illyana’s failed attempt to be reassuring. “I just need everyone’s minds to be quiet. Why is there so much fear?” Dani asked, nearing tears. Downstairs, Illyana heard people screaming.</p>
<p>“Dani,” Illyana said as she grabbed onto her shoulders, “you really need to calm down.”</p>
<p>“Don’t touch me,” Dani seethed.</p>
<p>“No,” Illyana said confidently, even though she was terrified. “I’m not leaving you right now.”</p>
<p>“I said don’t touch me!” Dani thrust out her hand, and a golden arrow appeared and hit Illyana in the chest.</p>
<p>Illyana looked down, expecting to see blood, but there was no physical arrow in her. However, she could feel its effects all the same. Her eyes rolled into the back of her head as her body fell, and her mind began replaying its worst memories.</p>
<p>
  <em>The Smiley Men threw her on the floor, ripping her clothes off as they tore into the flesh of her back.</em>
</p>
<p>The memory changed.</p>
<p>
  <em>The Smiley Men threw her down the stairs of Belasco’s castle. Her arm broke in several places.</em>
</p>
<p>The memory changed.</p>
<p>
  <em>She stabbed the rabbit, watching as blood poured out of its body. Behind her, Belasco chuckled.</em>
</p>
<p>The memory changed.</p>
<p>And again.</p>
<p>And again.</p>
<p>And again.</p>
<p>The memories changed more times than she could count, replaying every memory that haunted her thoughts daily. Memories of the Smiley Men and Belasco, of every broken bone and bloody scar, of every time she lost a piece of her soul and her will to be good. She was trapped in her mind, trapped in an endless state of horror. Then the worst image came to her mind.</p>
<p>
  <em>There was blood everywhere. It wasn’t her blood, but there was still a lot of it. She calmly made her way across the room, sword in hand. As she walked through the room, she looked down at the bodies on the floor, smiling gleefully.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>Piotr Rasputin’s metallic head laid at her feet; the rest of his body was not in sight. A few feet away from his head was a tanned hand. The hand was bloody and was obviously cut roughly from someone’s body. As Illyana focused on the area around the body, she saw Dani lying dead on the ground missing a hand. Illyana kept walking.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>She walked over the body of Rahne, who was cut in half mid-transition into wolf form. She walked right by Sam, whose guts were spilling out of his chest. She only stopped walking when she reached Roberto. He wasn’t dead yet. There was a bloody stab wound on his stomach. Blood was spilling from his lips as he choked on his own blood. His eyes were begging, pleading with her.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>“Illy,” he croaked out, “please.”</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>She ran her hand through his hair down his cheek as she cupped his face. Her nails, which were long and clawed, dug into his cheeks. She stared into his beautiful brown eyes and felt nothing. Then she snapped his neck like he was a twig. As he fell to the ground, she saw her reflection in his lifeless eyes. Her skin was deathly pale. Horns protruded from her wild blonde hair. Her smile was cold and cunning. Her eyes were a vivid red.</em>
</p>
<p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p>
<p>Illyana woke up abruptly from her nightmarish daze. She couldn’t move or breathe properly. Everything was flashing in and out of focus. She could feel someone’s hand on her forehead and someone else desperately gripping her hand. She could hear panicked voices all around her, but the voices just caused her head to spin more. It was like her senses were overwhelming her. She was drowning in them.</p>
<p>Eventually, all of the flashes of sight and sound calmed down, and she was conscious of the real world. She saw Dani passed out on her bed. She saw X-Men spread out throughout the room, talking in hushed voices. She saw her brother pacing back and forth in front of her bed. The hands that were crushing her own were Roberto’s, and the hand on her head was the Professor. It took her a moment to realize what he was doing, and she immediately rebuilt her mental barriers. Professor Xavier winced as he was thrown out of her mind.</p>
<p>“Stay out of my head,” Illyana seethed as she sat up. Upon realizing that she was now awake, all of the X-Men rushed towards her.</p>
<p>“I wasn’t reading your mind,” the Professor winced. “I was simply trying to bring you back to consciousness.”</p>
<p>“Professor,” Jean said worriedly, “are you okay?”</p>
<p>“I think, somehow, that her mind <em>bit </em>my mind,” Professor Xavier said, sounding confused. Everyone looked at Illyana, but she just shrugged. “We were downstairs when suddenly monsters started attacking the school. Fortunately, I picked up on Dani’s psionic energy, and I was able to temporarily put a halt to her abilities before she caused severe damage.”</p>
<p>“That’s when we found you,” Piotr joined the conversation, causing his sister to roll her eyes. “You were awake, but you weren’t… here. What did she do to you?”</p>
<p>Deciding to be helpful for once, mostly because she was confused herself, Illyana answered. “She was overwhelmed… everyone’s fears were flooding into her mind at once. I was trying to help when she… she threw an arrow at me?”</p>
<p>“An arrow?” Piotr asked, sounding confused.</p>
<p>“Yes, some kind of psychic arrow. What a cliché.”</p>
<p>Roberto groaned. “Not this again, Illy.”</p>
<p>“Roberto, you don’t understand. A thousand Native American stereotypes are popping into my head right now.”</p>
<p>“Didn’t you learn anything from the hospital?”</p>
<p>“Hey! Her abilities brought this stereotype to life. It wasn’t me this time.”</p>
<p>“When she wakes up, Dani is going t—” Roberto was cut off when someone cleared their throats.</p>
<p>Illyana rolled her eyes as she turned her attention to all of the X-Men who were watching this exchange. “What are all of you still doing here?” She asked coldly.</p>
<p>“Illya—” Piotr started, but Illyana cut him off quickly.</p>
<p>“You said you stopped Dani’s powers, right?” Illyana asked the Professor, causing him to nod. “There you have it! No more danger. You can all leave now.” The X-Men stayed for a couple more seconds before seeing that she was very serious. Her brother stopped in the doorway to look back at her before quickly leaving the room.</p>
<p>Once they left, Illyana quickly went to Dani’s bed. It was a struggle because her legs were so shaky, but she eventually sat down on the edge of Dani’s bed. She was planning to stay up and wait for Dani to wake up; it’s not like she was going to be able to sleep after that dreadful invasion of her fears. Roberto, of course, said that he was going to stay up with her, but within two hours, he was fast asleep on Illyana’s bed. Illyana didn’t mind waiting alone, though; it gave her time to let her thoughts run wild.</p>
<p>When Dani did finally wake up, she looked perplexed. “I feel weird,” she said. “It’s like I can feel people’s emotions, but they’re so weak.”</p>
<p>Illyana let out a dark chuckle. “Yeah, the Professor did something to you to stop you from killing the entire school.”</p>
<p>Dani suddenly sat up. “Oh my god,” she exclaimed. “I did something to you.”</p>
<p>“Yeah, you kind of broke my mind. Never do that again.”</p>
<p>“I’m so sorry,” Dani cried. “I didn’t want to hurt you.”</p>
<p>“It’s fine,” Illyana shrugged. “I mean, it sucked, but it was an accident. Besides, you and I take turns trying to kill each other.” Dani let out a sad laugh at that, causing Illyana to grin maliciously. “Do you know how you hurt me?”</p>
<p>Dani looked confused. “No, how?”</p>
<p>“You somehow formed a psychic <em>arrow</em> and shot it at me.”</p>
<p>“Not this again,” Dani groaned. “I thought we were done with this.”</p>
<p>“I can’t believe your own powers made you into a walking cliché,” Illyana teased.</p>
<p>“I would be careful, blondie,” Dani said in a playful angry tone. “We now know that I can knock your ass down with my mind, so you better be nicer to me.”</p>
<p>Illyana laughed at that. “If you ever hit me with one of those psychic arrows again, I’m going to teleport you to an alternate dimension where the ground spontaneously catches on fire, and I’m going to leave you there.”</p>
<p>Both Dani and Illyana burst out laughing at the threat, knowing that Illyana was only half-joking. For a while after this, they didn’t speak. They just laid next to each other, side by side. Each of their heads were swimming with a million thoughts about how bad things had gotten. They were both mirroring each other perfectly: both of them completely out of control and falling apart at the seams. It really was ironic given how much they used to hate each other.</p>
<p>“Illy?” Dani finally broke the silence.</p>
<p>“Hmm?” Illyana hummed in reply.</p>
<p>“I didn’t see what you were seeing when I shot you with that arrow,” Dani paused for a second, “but I saw what you were most afraid of.”</p>
<p>“Dani—”</p>
<p>“Illy, why are you your own worst fear?”</p>
<p>“Look at the two of us,” Illyana said instead of answering the question. “How are we ever supposed to defeat Essex if we can’t even defeat our own darkness?”</p>
<p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p>
<p>The first thing that Sam felt was cold. The room he was in was freezing cold, as was the table that he was strapped to. The room was pitch black; he couldn’t see anything, but he still had an eerie feeling that someone was watching him. His skin tingled, but he wasn’t sure if it was from the cold or the terror that was washing over him. Next to him, he heard movement as if someone were struggling.</p>
<p>“Who’s there?” he asked, feeling like an idiot in a horror movie.</p>
<p>“Sam?” A familiar Scottish accent asked.</p>
<p>“Rahne?” He said, relieved. “Where are we?”</p>
<p>“I don’t know,” she replied, her voice shaking. “I’m so cold.”</p>
<p>Before he could reply, a dark chuckle resonated throughout the room. “Who’s there?” He asked loudly, wishing he could move and protect Rahne. The chuckle just became louder, turning into a full evil cackle. The lights turned on, and Sam was momentarily blinded before everything returned to focus. They were in some sort of windowless room. There were multiple machines that did god-knows-what. There was a tray that held what looked like tools that you would see in surgery. In the center of the room was a man gleefully watching Sam and Rahne panic.</p>
<p>This man was pale, so pale that his skin was almost blue. There was a red diamond on his forehead. His eyes were glowing an eerie red, no pupils nor whites in his eyes, just a solid red glow. His face held a sinister smile. He wore a suit of blue and red, matching his physical appearances. He looked more like one of the demons that Illyana drew than a human being.</p>
<p>“Welcome back,” the man said through his teeth. “Our organization has greatly missed your presence.”</p>
<p>“Essex,” Sam seethed, fighting against the restraints.</p>
<p>The man let out a thundering laugh. “Essex was my name a long time ago, but it is no longer. You can call me Mister Sinister.”</p>
<p>Sam didn’t know how to respond to that. If Illyana or Roberto were here, they would point out how stupid his name was. Or they would tell him to lay off the clown makeup. But Sam and Rahne were the good ones; they never spoke out and mocked their enemies. All he could do was watch as Sinister walked over to the tray full of surgical equipment.</p>
<p>“Now,” Sinister said sinisterly, “we have to run a few tests.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>YAYYYYY!!!!!!<br/>So I brought in one of Dani's comic book powers (she can shoot psychic arrows).<br/>Also, I mean we all pretty much knew that the movie was hinting towards bringing Mister Sinister into the X-Men cinematic universe, right?????<br/>Eeek! I've been waiting to write this one for a while now.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0019"><h2>19. Chapter XIX: Something Wicked This Way Comes</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>The remaining New Mutants plot to save their friends with the help of some teenage rebellion.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hi!<br/>It's been so long, I'm soooo sorry.<br/>So, I was in the hospital... Don't worry, I'm fine, not gonna die or anything. The past few weeks have been a mess of doctor's appointments and catching up on missed assignments.<br/>I'm back now, though!</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Note: Remember how in X-Men Apocolypse electric fields stopped Nightcrawler from teleporting? We're gonna pretend that applies to Illyana too.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Chapter XIX: Something Wicked This Way Comes</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“What do you mean you found them?” Dani asked.</p>
<p>After weeks of avoiding all of the X-Men like the plague, the Professor's office had felt cold and unwelcoming. Illyana, in particular, had intended never to step foot in his office again. Now, however, the three young mutants stood alongside the X-Men as they listened to a giddy Kitty Pryde deliver the unexpected news.</p>
<p>“I mean, I found them,” Kitty exclaimed. “I hacked into the dark web to try to find any trace of illicit activities involving Essex Corp or any similar organization, and I found information related to the whereabouts of two young mutants fitting Sam and Rahne’s description.”</p>
<p>“Kitty is an excellent hacker,” Piotr explained supportively. Kitty beamed at her boyfriend.</p>
<p>“So you really found them?” Roberto asked.</p>
<p>“Yes!” Kitty exclaimed. “They’re in West Virginia, just outside of the Appalachian Mountains.”</p>
<p>It only took Illyana a moment to process the information before her mind immediately strategized a rescue. “So what’s the plan? We need to move quickly in case they are moved again.”</p>
<p>Everyone turned their attention to Professor Xavier. In direct contrast to the New Mutants, who looked like Christmas had come early, Professor Xavier looked troubled. Something about his expression gave Illyana the impression that he was not happy about this at all; he almost looked angry.</p>
<p>“Miss Pryde,” he began in a wary tone, “I really wish you had spoken to me about this information before you brought this to everyone’s attention.”</p>
<p>A wave of confusion washed over Illyana before the truth of the matter pulled her back into reality like whiplash. Roberto seemed to come to the same realization as his girlfriend.</p>
<p>“You don’t want us to find them,” Roberto said. “Do you, Professor?”</p>
<p>Professor Xavier sighed. “It seems a little too convenient that this information was so easily found online.”</p>
<p>“Easily?” Kitty scoffed. “I spent days searching for any type of information.”</p>
<p>“Exactly,” Professor Xavier explained. “You spent days searching for information, and suddenly the exact whereabouts of Sam and Rahne are available. It seems oddly suspicious to me. This appears to be an elaborate trap set to draw Illyana, Roberto, and Dani in.”</p>
<p>“Oh, it most definitely is,” Illyana surprised everyone by agreeing with the Professor. “But I’m more than willing to blow the trap up.”</p>
<p>“I’m afraid I cannot allow you to risk yourself like this.” He pulled a remote out from his desk and pressed a button on it. Illyana could feel the energy in the mansion change suddenly. She could feel the electricity as if it were burning through her body.</p>
<p>“What did you just do?” She asked.</p>
<p>“We learned long ago that electric fields could stop a mutant from using teleportation,” he explained. “I’m sorry, Miss Rasputin, but I can’t have you teleporting yourself to the Essex base.”</p>
<p>“You do realize it would be very easy for me to chop off your head and use it as a bowling ball,” Illyana snarled at him. She felt the now all too familiar darkness creeping up on her. She wanted to kill him.</p>
<p>Fortunately for the Professor, who didn’t seem too offended or surprised by the threat, Roberto put his hand on her arm. “Come on, Illy,” he said to her. “We’re done here.”</p>
<p>As she, Dani, and Roberto solemnly left the Professor’s office, Illyana could feel the darkness boiling over. She could feel the need to kill, the thirst for blood driving her mad. She desperately needed to get away from her friends before her eyes flashed red or she hurt them, so she squeezed Roberto’s hand one last time and quickly walked away from her friends.</p>
<p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p>
<p>It had only been a few hours when Illyana found herself standing in the shadows. She was watching her dark-haired friend as she took out all of her anger on the practice dummies in the training room. Even though she wasn’t the one who was empathic, Illyana could still feel the anger and frustration rolling off of her friend in waves. With a scream of pure fury, Dani positioned her arms as if she were shooting an imaginary bow and shot a psychic arrow in the dummy.</p>
<p>Illyana clapped slowly as she walked out of the shadows, like a villain in a cheesy action movie. “Bravo,” she cheered, but her voice was anything but cheerful. “You really showed that dummy who’s boss.”</p>
<p>Dani nodded solemnly. “Professor Xavier has been teaching me how to control these arrows,” she explained. “I want to punch him in the face, but I have to listen to him, or else I’ll destroy this entire place.”</p>
<p>Illyana accepted her explanation with a shrug. “How are you feeling? Still completely out of control? Or are you back to being a stable empath?”</p>
<p>“I would say I’m semi in control.”</p>
<p>“Good,” Illyana said with a wicked smile. “We’re going to need a little out of control.”</p>
<p>“What do you mean?” Dani asked. Illyana’s sudden change in attitude was more than enough to attract the younger girl’s attention.</p>
<p>“How good are you at controlling those psychic arrows of yours?” Illyana deflected the question.</p>
<p>“Good enough, I guess. I’m still working out a few kinks, but I can summon them at will.”</p>
<p>“Good to know. How many do you think you can shoot before you tire yourself out?”</p>
<p>“I don’t know,” Dani said, still confused about where this conversation was going. “I’ve shot fifteen in the past hour, and I’m still not completely worn out. Why do you ask?”</p>
<p>“Those arrows knocked me on my ass,” Illyana said with a grin. “They could be very…useful in a fight.”</p>
<p>As realization dawned on her, Dani grinned. “I thought the Professor said that we were banned from leaving.”</p>
<p>“Oh, Dani, darling,” Illyana mocked in an overdramatic fake British accent. “Since when do I ever listen to the rules?”</p>
<p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p>
<p>Dani, Roberto, and Illyana stood around the table in their room as they studied the map of West Virginia that they stole from the library. Illyana’s plan had seemed flawless at first:</p>
<p>Step One: Find out where Sam and Rahne are being held.</p>
<p>Step Two: Steal a car and go to said place.</p>
<p>Step Three: Kick ass.</p>
<p>What more could one possibly need in a plan? Unfortunately, Illyana’s complete lack of education had come to spite her yet again. She’d never been to a geography class in her life, so how was she supposed to know that there were a lot of places in West Virginia right next to the Appalachian Mountains? Her own lack of general knowledge completely screwed with step one of her plan. So that’s how she found herself bent over a map, trying to discern the best possible location for Essex to be located.</p>
<p>“How about there,” Illyana pointed to a spot. “That seems to be far enough away from major cities.”</p>
<p>“No,” Dani huffed. “That’s too close to a major highway. No way are they going to build a facility where any random person could accidentally stumble upon it.”</p>
<p>“Well, I don’t know then,” Illyana groaned. “They could be anywhere. We’re never going to find them before Essex moves them.”</p>
<p>“If only you knew someone with the mutant ability to speak every single language, including computer code,” a familiar voice spoke from the doorway. Illyana turned her head to find Doug Ramsey, along with nine other teenaged mutants entering the room. “It may have taken Kitty a while to find their location, but it only took me a minute to steal it from her computer.”</p>
<p>“What are you guys doing here?” Dani asked.</p>
<p>“Sam and Rahne are our friends too,” Amara explained as she approached the table. “We’re here to help any way we can.”</p>
<p>Roberto grinned wildly at all of their new friends. “Now that’s more like it! What did you find, Doug?”</p>
<p>Doug approached the map and pointed at a spot just outside of the mountain range. “That’s where the base is.”</p>
<p>Illyana squinted at the spot. “How are we supposed to know what that place is?”</p>
<p>“Fortunately for you, blondie,” Doug stated with a grin, “there is this wonderful invention called Google Earth.” Illyana was annoyed at the nickname, but she decided that breaking Doug’s nose would have to wait for another time. Doug put his laptop on top of the map as everyone gathered around behind him. He quickly pulled up Google Earth and began to type in the coordinates of the base location.</p>
<p>“Woah,” Izzy said as the image appeared on the map. “How are we supposed to get in there?”</p>
<p>The map showed a gray building resembling a prison. The walls appeared to be made of stone or concrete, and a giant stone gate surrounded the entire building. There did not appear to be any windows or other entrances, but Illyana knew that there were likely cameras everywhere. Essex loved cameras almost as much as Dani loved Rahne.</p>
<p>“Hey, Illy,” Roberto said, his wild grin never going away. “Do you think you can generate enough magic to knock down those walls?”</p>
<p>“Probably,” she replied nonchalantly, “but that wouldn’t be the best idea. I could end up using too much power and taking down the entire building on top of Sam and Rahne. No. I have a better idea.”</p>
<p>“What is this better idea supposed to be?” Amara asked.</p>
<p>“I think a good, old-fashioned demon bear could do the trick,” Illyana replied with a wicked grin. “Don’t you, Moonstar?”</p>
<p>“I think I could manage that,” Dani replied with a wicked grin of her own. “It could knock down those walls and eat a couple of Essex soldiers while we’re at it.”</p>
<p>“I’m sorry,” Izzy interrupted, “but what on Earth is a demon bear?”</p>
<p>“Pray you never find out,” Roberto answered in an amused tone. “You better not pass out and let it run loose this time.”</p>
<p>Dani swatted his arm, and the group went back to studying the image. They pointed out any potential weaknesses and areas that they should stay clear of. However, until Illyana brought up the next point, they had all forgotten about the most difficult part of the plan: transportation.</p>
<p>“This place will take several hours to drive to,” Illyana groaned. “We need to leave immediately if we’re going to make it before it’s too late.”</p>
<p>“Why are you driving?” Doug asked in a confused tone.</p>
<p>“Our darling, sweet, perfectly wonderful Professor put an electric barrier around the mansion,” Illyana explained with a sneer, “so I can’t teleport out.”</p>
<p>“Why don’t you just take one of the jets?” Doug asked.</p>
<p>“Wouldn’t it be difficult to steal one of the X-Men’s jets?” Roberto asked.</p>
<p>“Not as hard as you think,” Amara replied with a grin. “Not if you have the perfect distraction.” Amara turned her head, causing everyone else to follow her gaze.</p>
<p>A girl named Tabitha, who Illyana had always found loud but tolerable enough, leaned against the wall away from everyone. She was bouncing one of her explosive balls in her hand as she surveyed the conversation around her. When she realized everyone’s attention was on her, she grinned. “I guess I could make some noise.”</p>
<p>“Great!” Izzy said. “So Tabitha distracts the X-Men while we sneak down and take one of the jets.”</p>
<p>“No,” Dani said. “There’s no ‘we.’ Only Illy, Berto, and I. The rest of you have to stay.”</p>
<p>The rest of the group seemed shocked at hearing this and began to protest.</p>
<p>“As of right now,” Dani interrupted, “Essex is only interested in the three of us, but if they see all of you using your powers, they may change their minds. It’s too risky.”</p>
<p>“Besides,” Illyana added before anyone could argue further, “there are multiple X-Men in this building. I don’t mean to underestimate Tabitha’s skills, but it will likely take more than her to keep all of them distracted. Especially when they know that we want to go after Sam and Rahne.”</p>
<p>The group seemed reluctant, but they nodded along with the plan anyway. They would split into groups of two and cause chaos in different parts of the mansion. Nothing was off-limits, not even explosions. Lockheed would be flying close to Amara to give the impression that Illyana was close by. The only person not on board with this plan was Doug.</p>
<p>“At least bring me,” Doug explained. He quickly continued before someone could cut him off. “None of you know how to fly the jet, but I do. My powers aren’t interesting enough for Essex to be interested in me, but I can shoot a gun, and I know how to fight.”</p>
<p>Dani studied him for a moment before nodding. “All right,” she agreed. “The four of us then. Everyone else, you know what to do. Distract the X-Men at all costs, and we will be back as soon as we can.”</p>
<p>The group departed from their room and went their separate ways. Some of the teens were grinning at all of the chaos that they were about to cause. Illyana was almost sad that she was going to miss the look on Cyclops or Wolverine’s face when the first of Tabitha’s explosions would hit. Fortunately, she was distracted by her own task. Illyana, along with Dani, Roberto, and Doug, began to descend the stairs to the basement. She had an active sleep spell waiting in her hands in case someone tried to stop them.</p>
<p>They were only halfway down the stairs when a cacophony of screams, explosions, and ridiculously loud music began to ring throughout the entire mansion. Above her, she could hear Cyclops' voice yelling and his footsteps as he ran down the hall to find the source of the noise. Illyana found herself having to stifle her laughter to avoid making any loud noises. Finally, they reached the bottom of the stairs and began to rush towards the jet.</p>
<p>“Illyana!” her brother’s voice called out behind her. Illyana quickly turned to find Piotr and Kitty standing at the bottom of the stairs. She raised her hands, ready to shoot the sleep spell at them when her brother raised his hands in surrender. “You’re going after them, aren’t you?”</p>
<p>“I have to,” Illyana nodded.</p>
<p>“And there’s nothing I can do to convince you to change your mind?”</p>
<p>“Nothing at all.”</p>
<p>Piotr and Kitty made eye contact and shrugged simultaneously. “Okay then,” he said simply. “Let’s go.”</p>
<p>The New Mutants were obviously taken aback. “What do you mean ‘let’s go’?” Illyana asked.</p>
<p>“You’re my sister,” Piotr said like it was the most obvious thing in the world. “I’m going to help you.”</p>
<p>“We were planning to go either way,” Kitty explained. “I guess we all had the same idea of sneaking down to the jets.” Kitty and Piotr walked past the shocked younger mutants towards the jet, but Kitty stopped a few feet before she reached the jet. “Okay, I get why the three of you are determined to go, but why is Doug here?”</p>
<p>“I’m here to fly the jet,” Doug explained with a smile.</p>
<p>“Okay, but I can fly the jet.”</p>
<p>“No way, I called dibs,” he argued. Illyana turned to him and raised the sleeping spell in her hands. “Wait, no. Illyana, I can be helpful. I can help take down th-“ Illyana hit him with the spell before he could finish his sentence. Doug fell to the ground, sound asleep. The remaining mutants followed Piotr and Kitty onto the ship.</p>
<p>As Kitty began to fly the jet, Illyana felt her nerves calm and her mind sharpen as she prepared for the battle ahead. After all, it was what she was meant for. She was raised to be the perfect weapon, and she was determined to use it for good for once. If she had to be good for her friends while utilizing the worst parts of herself, she would gladly do so as many times as she needed to. Next to her, Piotr did not seem nervous about the upcoming battle either. He seemed deep in thought as if he didn’t know how to express his feelings. Finally, Illyana decided to put him out of his misery.</p>
<p>“Thank you,” she said quietly to him. “I know I’m not the nicest sister in the world, so thank you for doing this for me.”</p>
<p>Piotr smiled down at her and rested his hand on her shoulder. “I haven’t been the nicest brother in the world either, so I think it’s only fair.”</p>
<p>Illyana laughed softly at that. “Yeah, I guess we’re both just a mess.”</p>
<p>“I wouldn’t have it any other way, снежинка,” he said as he nudged her shoulder. “Besides, you being a mean sister meant that you bullied me into making a decision that was a long time coming.” Illyana looked at her brother confused, and Piotr held his finger to his lips in a shushing motion. He looked around to make sure no one was watching and then pulled a small velvet box from his jacket. “If all goes according to plan, I’m asking on our anniversary next week.”</p>
<p>Illyana gasped dramatically. “You’re in love,” she teased quietly in a sing-song voice.</p>
<p>"Seriously,” Piotr groaned, “now you act like a normal little sister?” Both siblings burst into quiet laughter immediately.</p>
<p>As she laughed, she looked around the jet. Somehow, without her even realizing it, Illyana had formed quite a large family. She had her brother, her future sister-in-law, her boyfriend, and her best friends. Suddenly, despite all of her past trauma, Illyana felt like the luckiest person in the world. She loved each and every single person on this jet, and she was going to save the other people that she loved. A few months ago, she’d had no one. She was isolated in her own world of terror and trauma. Now she had everything.</p>
<p>And she’d do whatever necessary to keep her newfound family together.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Poor Doug.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
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